That's you two with desire.
This is Adam and Joe.
Good morning.
It's 7 a.m.
It's Wednesday.
The mysterious midweek day.
The fulcrum.
The axis at the center of the week.
A kind of a pointless day that we're lobbying to have cancelled.
The axis of evil.
How can you have Wednesday cancelled?
It's the best day of the week.
It's a silly day.
Oh, come on.
I don't know anyone who dislikes Wednesday except for you.
I think it should be a holiday.
Really?
Well, that's a good point.
But you know, a lot of the best TV goes out on Wednesday.
Is that true?
Yeah.
What TV goes out on Wednesday?
I'm just saying instinctively.
Certainly in the old days, they used to put the best stuff on a Wednesday.
Our show used to go out on a Wednesday once in a while.
Did it?
Yeah.
Well, that was the best.
ER used to go out on Wednesday.
And, um... Wednesday's a good day for making big decisions at work.
Right.
Having meetings, you've still got two days to implement the results of the meeting.
Yeah.
It's an excellent day for leaving a partner.
That's true.
Or, you know, just doing important things in life.
Leaving a partner, because you've got a couple of days to get over it.
You've had Monday and Tuesday to think about it.
That's right.
Wednesday to action it, as they say.
Nice.
Thursday and Friday to deal with the consequences.
And then on the weekend you can go out and meet someone else.
It's not a big problem.
What's the problem?
What's the problem with Wednesday now coming up in the show today apart from the usual mix of excellent music Can I just say no go on then that that you know, I think six music plays the best mix of music Around I think that's true and you're not just saying that to kind of a cow town curry favor the powers the key to the bosses of the big British castle What curry flavor is there to be flavored?
What?
What a delicious curry flavor.
No, I'm not trying to curry favor, but it's- You know what, I agree with you.
Yeah.
Contemporary radio is play listed, uh, out of existence.
That's true, man.
You know, you switch on your average radio station, you have to plow through a lot of, should we call it, dross, to get to the, uh, delicious chicken McNuggets.
yeah you know you tend to hear the same records every hour that's true over and over again not here at six music no no by no means and apart from that great music uh we have we have the nation's favorite feature which is called text the nation where we invite you to communicate with us about an important topic and we'll be telling you about today's important topic uh very soon but first
Again, I feel guilty about this, but it's, it's, it's Winehouse.
Yeah, what's the BBC's stance on Winehouse's situation?
I was watching TV last night, a Winehouse TV advert comes on encouraging people to... Really?
And I was thinking that's not right, because they are way capitalising on the out-of-control-ocity of... So I think the thing to do, listeners, during this record is just not enjoy it.
Well, you can enjoy it, but try and think about what you're gonna do to help her.
Yeah, or think about your life.
Yeah.
Think about the things you may be addicted to, that's one way or another, and you know, whether you need to go to some kind of a mental rehab.
And if you've just scratched your partner's name into his face or your face, just go back to bed.
She's one talented, whacked-out dame.
She's a crazy, talented girl.
That's Amy Winehouse.
Lovely voice.
Tears dry on their own, this is Adam and Jo.
Here on 6 Music, we've only got a couple more days with you after this, folks, and then... Yeah, and we've only got a couple more hours of the show.
That's true.
Yeah, only... Is that a good way to look at life?
Two hours and fifty minutes.
Everything's running out.
Everything's ticking away.
Make the most of it while you can!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Live every day like it's your last.
Well, my son said to me very poignantly yesterday, Daddy, why does time work the way it does?
What did you say to that?
I said, what do you mean?
And he said, well, why does everything just get older and older and then goes and then it goes away and then new things come along?
He's getting frightened about the idea of mortality and stuff at the moment.
Really?
What did you say to that?
I said, listen, you're talking to the wrong guy.
Sean Kievny's back next week.
You might like to chat to him about it.
No, I said... I said, that's the way it works, mate.
and there's nothing anyone can do about it.
It just, time goes forward and much as we'd all like to go backwards, you can't think about it like that.
It's fun, there's lots of nice things about getting old and it's great to see new things coming along.
But don't worry about it, we're all in it together, I said.
Do you know what I would have said to him?
What would you have said?
Shut up and watch the telly!
Slap!
Listen, I said that to him afterwards, because he kept on about it.
And so after I'd given him my little pep talk, I just lost my temper.
I kicked him in the groin.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
We do not tolerate this kind of humour at the Big British Castle.
I'm sorry.
You were saying earlier that Wednesday was a great day for telly.
You know what?
You're right.
There's an Ashton Kusta film on BBC One tonight.
There's The Restaurant, the new reality series on BBC Two.
There's Anne Widdicombe versus The Truance on ITV.
And there's Big Brother on Channel 4.
Widdicombe.
You see a water cooler television.
They put it on Wednesday so that it sort of bleeds throughout the rest of the week like that.
Did you see the last Widdicombe thing?
Well, I was very interested in her versus the hoodies.
That was the first one she did.
Was it last year or earlier this year?
I think it was earlier this year.
And it was ridiculous.
Utterly, utterly pointless and ridiculous.
And that's exactly why they recommissioned it.
Because everybody the next day went, did you see that ridiculous woman being stupid?
Yeah.
And that's good enough for them.
As long as you make something grating enough and ludicrous enough.
For people to talk about.
Yeah, that's the job done.
What else have we got to look for?
Well, actually, there is some good stuff on telly, but it starts at 11.20 on BBC Two.
Brazil is on.
Is it?
Yeah, followed by Arrested Development.
Ooh.
So you've got to stay up really late to catch the good telly these days.
What channel's that on?
BBC Two.
BBC Two!
The second big British castle.
Shall we have some more music now?
This is about, are they from Brazil, CSS?
Yes, they are.
And this is one of these slightly unwieldy, mad-looking bands, you know what I'm saying?
Really?
Their image is to sort of have no image.
And yet they're kind of all over the place and sexy and there's a lot of kind of nutty looking women in this band and stuff.
How many people are there in the band?
I don't know, like seven or something?
Thereabouts.
This is a band called CSS.
The track's called Off The Hook.
Enjoy.
She's got a nice voice, hasn't she?
Very nice.
Assuming it's a lady, it might be a small boy.
You never know in pop music these days.
That's right, it's a filthy nightmare.
Could be the new one from Little Chris.
Kate Garraway's hair's different today.
Listen, as Adam Buxton is obsessed with Kate Garroy, who presents GMTV, he's obsessed with her hair.
Well, yesterday she had the most incredible hairstyle I've ever seen.
You should start reading some Lady Max.
They probably cover her hair in some detail.
Maybe I will.
I might go online after this show and look for a gallery that shows all, look, it's just normal today.
She looks lovely today.
Do you remember that show about the sort of modern update of Beauty and the Beast?
Where the Beast lives in the... He lives in the sewer.
In the sewer of New York.
Yeah, I do.
She looks a bit like the chick from that, doesn't she?
Was it not even called just Beauty and the Beast, that show?
Maybe.
She looks a bit like the chick.
You know, I don't remember.
I don't think I ever watched an episode in its entirety, because it was one of the worst programs ever made, wasn't it?
He was just... The Beast looked like... He looks like that guy, Fabio.
Do you remember Fabio?
Yeah, the muscle man.
The muscle man.
He had a big mullet.
I'm getting a mullet.
You know what I'm saying?
Really?
Have you ordered it?
No, it's coming.
It's growing.
Is it?
Yeah.
I need a haircut.
Oh, that's so cool.
One day I'm going to wake up and I will have a mullet after years and years of pointing at other people and saying, look at that mullet.
I'll have one.
And maybe, you know, that's middle age.
No, I'm just appointed about Garraway yesterday.
This link is very rambly.
Have I had permission from the Ramblers Association?
It's about hair.
Is it?
Okay, good.
It's all about hair.
And yesterday, Garraway's hair, it went, it looked as if her hair was just hanging down normally, but then she was wearing a kind of bandana.
No, it was, it was, it was centre parted and braided at the front, right and left.
Yeah, it's, it's a common style.
I think Lisa's probably more to say than that.
I've never seen that style.
that looks as if you're wearing a kind of sweatband, but the sweatband is made out of two braids of your own hair.
Yeah.
It's insane.
It's absolutely insane.
I think she's lovely and she does very well to get up so early and be so perky.
Listen, I never was impugning her presenting skills or her loveliness, because she is lovely.
shall we play some more music yeah we've got some great music coming up uh this hour i've got a an archive session track that i'm really excited about coming up towards the top of the hour my archive session track is coming up after this and it's from the young marble giants but this track right now
is Prefab Sprout.
Now this is not a version that I'm familiar with of this track.
This is not the album version of Appetite.
Weird.
Let's listen to it.
Well now here's some old music on Six Music and just a second ago you heard Prefab Sprout with Appetite.
That's the non-album version and I didn't really like it.
What was that version?
Didn't sound live?
No, I think maybe it was the single version.
They used to do quite different single versions.
Really?
Yeah.
Well, I had the 12 inch and it wasn't like that.
That was pretty much the same apart from the synth and there was no harmonica on there.
And the chorus was different as well.
There were some harmonies there.
But the synth at the beginning of that was horrible.
It was a bit weird, yeah.
Great tracks, still a great tune, I enjoyed hearing that.
Yeah, but right now, here's a track from a band who were around, they were around the same time, maybe a little bit before Prefab Sprout, the Young Marble Giants.
I don't know a huge amount about this band, other than they were very influential in the post-punk scene.
and they pioneered, or at least were part of a very stripped-down sound, you know what I'm saying?
Really minimal, as you'll hear in this John Peel session from August the 18th, 1980.
Hope you like this one, it's called Brand New Life by Young Marble Giants.
Yeah, rocking hard with the woodblock there.
Smash that woodblock!
I like it.
That was good.
Young Marble Giants from the John Peel Sessions 1980.
That track was called Brand New Life.
Fact update.
The woman from Beauty and the Beast was actually Linda Hamilton from the Terminator films.
There you go.
That factoid has come courtesy of Tobias Sturt.
The monkey-jawed genius of Linda Hamilton.
And here's someone else who's emailed.
You can email us on adamandjo.sixmusicatbbc.co.uk or text us
are on 64046.
This is from Fitzy from Wales.
Hey Adam and Jo, I'd just like to say I really like the jingle for Text-A-Nation.
I've managed to get it onto my PC and then onto my phone and I've set it as my text received ringtone.
Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
That's good, man.
I hope you received many texts.
Wouldn't it be exciting if he, if he texted us his phone number, we could text him.
Right.
And activate the jingle.
And it would, and so.
And it would activate.
He would be part of text summation and the jingle would be on his phone at the same time.
Yeah.
Wouldn't that be an exciting moment of synchrony?
Not a D?
Synchronicity with the police?
Yes, it would.
Yeah, that would be extraordinary.
I don't think anyone would ever get over that.
Is it Back for Lashes time?
Here's Priscilla.
Back for Lashes with Priscilla.
This is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music.
It's time for the news with Mike and Lucy.
Editors there with an end has a start.
This is Adam and Joe on BBC6 Music.
We were just discussing during that link that I, Joe Cornish, I don't dislike editors.
I think they're brilliant.
Let me make that clear.
But I'm just, I just don't understand that kind of music.
Music with that tone in it.
That level of drama.
Well that level of drama, that level of seriousness, it just seems a bit silly to me.
And I was asking what, like, in an attempt to understand editors and those who like them, what situation in real life would that music really be suitable for?
You know, because sometimes with music you think, I'm in a really good mood, I'll put on this track, or I'm feeling sad, I'll put on this track.
What mood would that be suitable for apart from reading the papers?
Well, very simple.
You know, situations like you are running from a house where your girlfriend is destroying your possessions and it's raining, there's a lot of lightning, and then you hear a scream as she falls down the stairs.
I tell you what it is, it's kind of like UltraVox, like Midjior type music, isn't it?
Yeah.
Basically, they're Midjior for the noughties.
It's sort of cinematic, I suppose.
Yeah, similar, like a long coat, a pencil moustache, a big, you know, Germanic statues, dry ice, and just standing with the wind blowing, leather boots, kind of thing, smoking a cigarette.
You damn understand!
Maybe that's it, maybe you're smoking a fag from a packet of fags, as the news reader described them, slightly so.
We were surprised by that description on BBC Six Music.
You're holding a fag packet, and you're looking at that picture of diseased lungs.
Yeah.
How far must I go?
That is that kind of moment, isn't it?
That's right.
Yeah?
Anyway, you might be interested to know, um, if you're an editor's fan that Tom from Editors will be appearing on Steve LaMax Show, what day is it?
Friday.
He's gonna be, and what time is Steve LaMax Show on?
Four til seven.
I always listen to it.
I just forget time.
You're just so drunk It's you and Amy Winehouse and Pete Doketin having a big we get together a bowl of jelly That's how we talk when we're together Steve Lamax
Now coming up soon listeners is the nation's favourite feature, text the nation at 8 o'clock, but there's another feature going on on the show at the moment, it's, it's, what do they call it?
Stripped across the week?
There's a special type of media word for that, isn't there?
Spread, banded, something like that?
Wiffled?
That's the one wiffled, it's wiffled through the week, and it's called Band-Aid.
It's a segment we've inherited from Sean W. Kivney, but we've perverted it to our own needs.
Basically, me and Adam have composed a song each, and we'd like you to listen to clips of them, decide which one you'd like to hear the full version of this Friday.
This Friday show is going to be a big show, it's our last show, and one of the biggest events on that big show will be the unveiling of the winner of Band Aid.
You can go to the Six Music website and listen to little extracts from both, and then click.
That's how you vote.
You click on the one you like best.
The votes are collated here by BBC Monkeys.
All you have to do is learn to click.
Um, just extend your finger, give it a flick.
Now, at the moment, let me say that Joe is beating me by around about 200%, and that's depressing to me because I believe that the clip more or less encapsulates everything you're gonna get from Joe's song.
Where is mine?
You're wrong.
Mine is just the tip of the iceberg.
There's all kind of verses and middle-eights and choruses and stuff that you're not even getting into.
I heard yours is an inverted iceberg that floats on its tip.
Oh, with the bottom up in the air.
Well, let's have a listen right now.
This is a clip from mine, Adam Buxton's band-aid track, which is called Jane's Brain.
She'd use her brain to think of things that she didn't have She'd think of cars and she'd think of fancy grasses And she'd think of big houses and she'd think of cars
Wow.
James Brain, if you want to hear the full version of that, go to BBC6 Music and click on that one.
Don't say it like that.
I like it.
I'm laughing with joy and excitement.
It's like, what else is in her brain?
Exactly.
It sounds good.
I like the fact that you repeat the whole car idea.
Well, that is explained.
That's explained in the next verse.
Is it?
Yes.
I genuinely really want to hear the whole thing.
I can't believe that we have to wait till Friday.
Well, yeah, yeah, exactly.
So tantalizing.
So we hear a clip from Joe Cornish's piece right now.
Yeah, this is my track.
It's a kind of Euro house number about shopping when you're abroad.
It's called European Supermarket.
Shall I tell you what is winning it for you so far?
What?
Is that sound you've got in there at the end?
That's the hook, man.
That's the most important part, you know, of the song.
People want to hear more of that.
It's addictive.
I'm addicted to it myself.
I'm addicted to my own work.
I've got some sounds like that in Jane's Brain.
You're tweaking Jane's Brain, aren't you?
I think you're going home and tweaking it.
I was thinking last night, I bet you Adam brings in a new clip.
I was thinking that.
He brings in a new clip.
And I bet he beats me with his new clip.
But you haven't.
You know, I'm winning at the beginning of the week, but it could all change.
There's today's whole day, you know, the one today to vote.
And then there's all of tomorrow's day.
The Thursday.
And then yes, so there's like 48 hours.
There's over 50 hours left to vote.
Anything could happen.
I don't mind if I'm beaten.
Let me just say that.
But, I don't want to be absolutely thrashed.
You know, I don't want it to be ridiculous, like no one wants to hear Jane's brain.
Well, you're all ready, because a couple of people do.
A couple of people have voted, so you're all right.
Look on the bright side.
Here's Digitalism with Idealistic.
That sounds fantastic, doesn't it?
That's going to be very good, yeah.
All those guys.
There's an amazing article in Mojo the other month all about Hollandosia Holland and all those Motown times.
Well, there's a terrific documentary I saw recently.
I can't recall its name, I'm getting you confused with the Oasis album, but it's in the Shadow of Giants.
It's all about the...
the musicians who played on all of those tracks was called.
Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It was called something like that.
Something like that.
It was really good, and it interviewed all the drummers, and it sort of tells you how you can recognize each drummer by very subtle differences in their fills.
Ooh.
And they play all the different fills, and they're some of the best fills I've ever met.
Yeah, and are some of them called fill?
the drummers yeah no oh okay it's time for my archive session track and this is one i'm really excited about hearing one of my favorite bands orange juice uh epon collins has a new album coming out a new solo album coming out soon but this is back from the old days from 1980 and one of the great things about orange juice is they're a terrific live band
A lot of their early albums just sound as if they're recorded in one take, like albums used to be.
So they're guaranteed to sound amazing, if not better, than the album versions.
And this is a classic track.
This is called Falling and Laughing by Orange Juice.
Yeah, that's Orange Juice from the 21st of October, 1980, the John Peel Sessions on Radio 1 with Falling Down.
Fantastic.
Falling and Laughing.
Sorry, Falling Down.
That was Michael Douglas and Joel Shoemaker with Falling Down.
Was that Joel Shoemaker?
You don't like Joel Shoemaker, do you?
Good lord above!
Uh, it's from somebody called Al.
He says he's walking nine miles home from a night shift.
Right, so we should pay attention to what he wants.
This is what he wants.
Can I beg you not to play Haven to Blue, do you?
It needs a got.
And another have instead of the do.
Or something.
Thanks, fellas.
Oh, it's King Creosote he's talking about.
Oh, he doesn't want me to play that!
You haven't a clue, do you?
He's, uh... Can I beg you not to play, haven't a clue, do you?
He's worried about the grammar.
It needs a got and another have instead of the do.
He's saying you, uh... We can't not play it because of the grammar of the title.
No, that's... If we started doing that, we wouldn't play most popular music.
Exactly.
The grammar's very poor in a lot of modern music.
A lot of... A lot of it.
What was the name of that chap?
He was called.
He is called in fact.
As long as he's still with us.
Al.
I don't know his second name.
Well you said it.
The inflection on the owl was getting ready for us like a name then.
Well I'm crazy with my inflections.
It makes it more interesting.
Oh you dropped me right in the inflection bucket.
It's like there's certain comedians when they when you say it like a number.
Yeah, I was there for 500 Yeah, exactly exactly like that.
I was there for nine The air minutes what no that's exactly wrong.
That's a bad example
Now, Joe Cornish, how do you feel about Courtney Love?
Well, I'm confused about Courtney Love.
Why?
Because she's turning into one of these stars that struggles in America and then comes over to England and tries to kind of establish roots.
Here, she was interfering with Noel Fielding for a while, wasn't she?
The Mighty Boobs.
Then she had a fling with someone else.
Did she try and hit on David Walliams?
I'm sure she'll get her tentacles on Walliams at some stage.
She's been kind of Steve Coogan.
She had a tristate.
There you go, Coogan.
But she's always been an Anglophile, you know.
Could you imagine?
She used to hang around with the teardrop explodes in the Liverpool scene way back when she was always a part of that whole area.
And Britain's been in her blood for a long time.
She's got some kind of crazy book out, hasn't she, where she pictures of her bum.
She's going through a thin stage at the moment, isn't she?
She's on some insane kind of diet.
She actually confuses me.
She reckons she got a little porky towards the end of the last year because she was eating lots of macrobiotic foods and she felt the fact that they were macrobiotic was enough so she could eat as much of them as she wanted.
So she just ate loads and loads of macrobiotic desserts.
I'm confused about her relationship with Kurt Cobain as well.
Right.
rock heroes yeah you love Kobe second untouchable rock god that's right because he seems like such a sensitive soul and she is so much the opposite yeah well what you know was she his yoko oh no oh what does that mean I don't know we can discuss that more after we hear some of whole this is Miss world
Make of that what you will, listeners.
That was whole with Miss World.
She's so defiant.
She hates the Miss World pageant.
She thinks it's a shallow sham.
What's she talking about?
It's a wonderful pageant!
It's about time the Miss World Pageant was targeted and exposed for the ridiculous parade of shallow values it is.
Thanks, Courtney.
That's an old track though, isn't it?
Yeah, yeah.
That's from living through this, I think.
Hey, we don't usually do dedications, but Steve in London has texted us twice.
As he?
Yeah.
It's the most text we've ever got.
He says, please wish Sarah from Edinburgh happy birthday.
She's been texting you two over the past couple of weeks.
Just because of that use of pirate English towards the end of the sentence.
We're reading it out.
Yeah, happy birthday, Sarah.
Yeah, happy birthday.
Have a lovely one.
And you know, big cuddles and hugs and kisses from me and Adam.
Are we allowed to say happy birthday?
No, it's... It's copyright, isn't it?
It's copyright.
Yeah, you have to pay about five grand.
Is that, surely that's an urban myth?
No, it's true.
Is it?
It's true.
You can't see it, but people do see it in movies, though.
Yeah, but they pay the money, they splash the cash.
Right.
In fact, that is a way that a lot of musicians try and make extra money is by writing new happy birthday songs.
Ah, Kelly's got one.
There you go.
Yeah.
Who else?
Stevie Wonder, of course.
We should have a compilation of those.
You know, if you can write a happy birthday song better than that classic,
then you could be in the money forever.
I have to work again.
Maybe there'll be something about that on the news right now, which is read by Nikki and... Think, think.
Try and psychically project into the newsroom and see the newsreaders in your mind's eye.
Mike?
Nikki?
Mike and Lucy?
There we go, the coral.
He'd rather die than say goodbye, so it's best stick with him, otherwise he'll kill himself.
There you go.
Not much of a kind of circumstance to operate a relationship under.
No, that's true.
Championed by the Arctic Monkeys, that band are very much.
They support them often, don't they?
And I think we'll be doing so at some of the festivals, or have done so.
Right, right.
They're, uh, yeah, you know, they're a good band and they've got a new album out which is supposed to be very good indeed.
Now, listeners, this is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music.
It's time for Serial Thriller.
Ah, this is the part of the show where a listener elects two tracks to play back-to-back so that we can have some breccy.
And that, in itself, is thrilling, hence the pun.
Serial thriller.
It's a segment that was invented by the fellow we're sitting in for, the wonderful Sean Kievny, who'll be back on Monday.
But for the moment, we're kind of doing it.
Yeah.
You know, another pun would have been... Yeah.
I'm just stating the obvious there.
Yeah, it's just radio.
Doing it.
It is wicked.
Serial filler they could have had and that would imply the records were just filler, right?
Wrong exactly.
You need the thriller to make it seem more exciting.
Yeah.
Yeah, who've we got on the line today?
We've got you and stone from Exeter Come in you and hello.
How are you doing?
I'm very well.
Thanks.
Who are you?
Well, we're absolutely fine We've got some facts about you here you and so that we can paint more of a picture of your personality there for the listeners Are you ready for these?
I'm ready.
Yep
Okay, your favourite film... What do you think Ewan's favourite film is?
Just listening to his voice there, Adam.
Listening to his voice, I would say his favourite film is The Last Mimsy.
That's so close.
Yeah?
Which one is it, Ewan?
It's Taxi Driver.
Taxi Driver.
That's a strange one to have as your absolute favourite, though.
Are you a seething nutball?
Yeah.
Pretty much, yeah.
Have you got a lot of rage?
I've got a lot of rage, but I keep it locked up.
You and that?
I mean, that's unquestionably a great film.
Ah, of course, directed by Martin Scorsese starring Robert De Niro, but apparently so.
And I was just pointing it out for any five-year-olds listening, you know what I mean?
Thanks.
You never know.
But...
It's difficult to watch, though.
Here's a fact about Taxi Driver.
The only scene in Taxi Driver that doesn't have Travis Bickle in it is what, Euan?
The entire film is told through Travis Bickle's eyes apart from one scene.
What is that scene?
Um...
I don't know.
Isn't it the scene with Lady from Moonlighting and she's in the campaign offices?
No, because you can see through the window.
The only scene is where Harvey Keitel's pimp, you know, chats to pimp character.
There's a little scene with him and Jodie Foster, isn't there?
Yeah, but he beats it up.
Does he beat her up or does he dance with her?
I think he dances with her.
And then beats her up.
Isn't that a fascinating fact?
That is fascinating, Joe Cornish.
Joe films Cornish.
And Euan, what do you do?
How do you make your living?
I work in IT and finance.
And you're going on holiday to Italy this weekend, Ewan.
Hooray!
Yeah, that'll be fun.
Whereabouts in Italy are you going?
Le Marche.
Le Marche?
Mark Le Marche.
Wow, that's a very angry town.
That's where they make... Obsessed with pop facts.
They make real cream there.
And do you, before you go on holiday, are you going for a week, Ewan?
A week, yep.
Before you go on holiday, will you check the 10 day weather forecast or will you just leave it to chance?
I think I'll go as far as the 5-day weather forecast.
That's good.
Leave a bit of kind of a mystery to the holiday.
Right.
Yeah.
Because it can be depressing if you check that 10-day forecast, you go out there and it's totally rubbish and you just think, why am I even bothering?
Because usually it's right, you know, that's the thing.
You think, wow, weather forecasts, they're not always right, are they?
Yeah, pretty much they are, when you go on holiday.
Our final fact about Ewan, and maybe the most fascinating fact of all, is that Ewan is currently engaged in the making of his very own film.
Is that right, Ewan?
That is right, yes.
Are you doing a film course?
I'm doing a film course, yep.
Nice for a time when I'm not at work.
Are you making a short film, or are you launching into your first feature?
I'm starting off with a short, and probably ending with a short, to be honest.
What's it called?
It's called The Busker.
The Busker.
I like it.
Is it, uh, pornographic?
No, it's a family friendly film.
No.
Good, good, good.
No, it's not.
Where's your accent from?
That's not an Exeter accent, is it, Ewan?
No, Scotland.
Abadine of a choice.
Abadine, right.
I like the fact that our callers, we question them so much, you hear a certain weariness in their voices by the end of our questioning.
How long has this been going on for?
Six minutes?
It's like, why did I call that show?
So tell us about the music you've picked out for us, Ewan.
Well, the two films are hit the city by Mark Lanigan and touched and voted by Deus, who is my favourite artist.
The Mark Lanigan band and Deus not tracks that I'm familiar with at all, actually.
Well, hopefully you'll like them.
Yeah, well, thank you very much.
I am looking forward to making their acquaintance.
Hey, Ewan, thanks for putting up with this.
Thanks for calling.
If you listeners out there want to do a serial thriller, then get in touch with us via email or by text.
But Ewan, have a fantastic time in Italy.
I really hope the weather is perfect for you.
Have a good break.
Have a great day.
And here's the Mark Lanigan band with Hit The City.
Wow, all those different sounds and they were all in a sequence.
Six music.
Terry, we're doing a trail on Friday.
At about 4.42, can you just call from your phone and say six music?
You alright?
Sure.
Yeah, thanks.
And I'll record you and then I'll put it in the trail.
Six music.
Make it sound quite urgent, as if someone's going, what's the best radio station quickly?
Six music.
I love trails like that.
Before that you heard the two music choices of our caller today, our serial thriller Ewan who is out there in Exeter and he chose for us the Mark Lanigan band and Dais with a track called Suds and Soda.
Before that you heard Adam Buxton being very rude about Hollywood filmmaker Joel Shoemaker.
Now I feel a bit bad about it because you've, Joe's been talking in his defence and because Joe is one of the people that listens to the commentaries on a lot of movies on DVDs and Joe's telling me what a nice guy he sounds like on his movies
But I was making the point... I don't care how old he is!
I thought you were going to say an industrial accident.
Right.
He's a gay man.
He had a terrific time in the 70s by the looks of things.
Right.
Doing all sorts of bits and bobs.
He's a little ravage now.
He's a little ravage.
And then, you know, when I was a kid and didn't really have much taste in films, he made some classics.
The Lost Boys.
I love that film.
Your affection for him is more or less based on The Lost Boys.
And also St.
Elmo's Fire.
St.
Elmo's Fire.
Now I did watch that recently.
Yeah, it's a terrible, terrible, terrible film.
I never watched it.
But when it was released in 1980, whatever, it seemed like the most glamorous, sophisticated and exciting thing in the world.
1985.
Well, it was a Brat Pack film, wasn't it?
Yeah.
So it had the likes of Andrew McCarthy in it, and who else was in it?
All those fellas.
Roderick O'Dell.
Demi Moore.
Simon Thompson.
All the Brat Pack.
John Turner.
Phil Robespierre.
Felicity Huck.
Here's another email, Adam, that might make you think again about your dislike for Joel Shoemaker.
Oh, yeah.
Who's it from?
It's from Sean McDonald.
Hello, Adam and Jo.
As I turned on the radio this morning, I caught you describing Joel Shoemaker as, quote, an absolute toilet bowl.
That's true.
I can prove it.
When I was living in New York in 1998, I met up with a friend who now lives in Toronto.
Whilst we were having lunch in a deli, in came Joel Shoemaker with another guy.
My friend Jason Walker looked directly at him and booed him.
Ooh, I wouldn't do that.
I was shocked.
My friend turned to me and said, that was for Batman and Robin.
That's rough, man.
Joel Shoemaker looked sadly at the ground.
I think he knew.
Another friend of mine once booed Hale and Pace when he was getting money out of a cash line in Aberdeen.
You've got the wrong friends, guy.
Listen, I'm not advocating people going, I would never boo the bloke.
And I was not saying that he as a human being was a toilet bottle.
Joel Shoemaker, he's a very soft and self
deprecating man.
He is ashamed.
What does he talk about on the commentary for The Client then?
One of the most unwatchable films ever made with Susan Sarandon?
You like courtroom thrillers.
Not that one.
That was a test of my affection for courtroom thrillers and it failed.
He discovered Brad Renfro.
Oh.
Okay.
Who Brad Renfro?
He's the guy that got high on drugs and tried to steal a boat whilst forgetting to unchain it from the dock.
He's brilliant.
He's a brilliant actor.
He's in Larry Clark's Bully.
Right.
He's really good in that.
He's in all sorts of good things.
Listen, I'm not saying that he's an entirely worthless person.
I don't want to have him killed or anything.
But eight millimetre with Nick Cage.
But it does contain the line.
Uh, you can't unsee what you see.
I like that line.
Yeah.
And, of course, the number 23, which Joel Schumacher directed, uh, which came out earlier this year starring Jim Carrey.
Yeah, that's, that's, um, one of Adam and my favourite films of this year, the number 23, just because of its breathtaking awfulness.
Uh, it includes a mysterious book, uh, full of kind of mysterious, uh, clues and stuff, and sort of prophetic.
Jim Carrey finds this book.
It's given to him as a present for his birthday by his... Yeah, he's obsessed
with numbers why he's obsessed in particular with the number 23 it's this idea that the number 23 is everywhere in the world yeah that I hadn't heard of before this film and I quit that I quickly forgot any number but anyway he discovers this mysterious book in a bookshop and the author of the book is a woman called Topsy Kretz
Top Secrets!
It's amazing.
You should kind of see it just for that moment.
Yeah.
Here's some Maximo Park with girls who play guitars.
Maximo Park no longer talking about girls who play guitars.
Now they just talk about politics.
Politics.
George Bush.
They like to talk about George Bush.
He's drunk with power.
He is drunk with power.
Yeah, and Gordon Brown, he's a breath of fresh air.
He's a fresh of breath air.
Everyone's forgotten about the bad old days and all the mistakes that Tony Belya made and it's a fresh start not only for the country but for the Labour Party itself.
A jug-eared Scottish breath of fresh air.
Now we just had an email, a message from someone who was listening in Finland.
Yes, his name's Tim Burt, he's a journalist, editor and photographer, and he says to Adam and Jo, I've been listening to you for two weeks, and I have no idea who you are.
There's no biography on the website, so who the hell are you?
And where do you come from?
Are you...
Comedians?
You're quite funny, by the way.
Tim Bird, journalist, editor, photographer.
Finland.
Well, thanks very much for your message, Tim, and thanks for not ending that email with a stream of abuse.
Which I thought that was the direction I thought it was going to go in.
Does Wikipedia exist in Finland?
It must do.
Pop us into Wikipedia.
We're on Wikipedia.
There should be a biog for us on 6 Music.
Basically, Joe and I used to do a TV show on Channel 4, which we started doing in 1997.
It was kind of a cutlery and dishware review show.
We used to review all the latest table furnishings.
Joe's joking.
He's joking.
I'm a comedian.
He's a kind of comedian.
It was like a pop culture review show, Tom.
Tim?
What was his name again?
Tony Tom Timm Tom Timm from Finland.
Sorry.
I forgot your name there for a second and Yeah, we used to make it ourselves.
So it was a homemade.
It was like Wayne's world except real it was the way I used to explain it sometimes and And that was it.
We made that for a few years and after that we appeared on on some top hundred shows talking about scariest movies and things like that and
And now we mainly beg on street corners and we do this.
Hey, we noticed in the last news bulletin, he didn't say fag packets.
He changed it to cigarette packets.
We've had an effect on the news.
We're powerful.
And now here is the news on BBC 6 Music, read by Mike and Lucy.
Text-a-nation!
Text, text, text!
Text-a-nation!
What if I don't want to?
Text-a-nation!
But I'm using email.
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter, text!
time for the nation's favorite feature text the nation where we throw the phone lines open as opposed to the rest of the show when they're open anyway they're just sort of open they're just they creak open but right now we're throwing them open and we are encouraging you to communicate with us on today's text the nation subject which is today's text the nation subject Adam is
I'm just opening the envelope that's come from the Houses of Parliament.
See what the subject is.
And today's text the nation subject is disappointing encounters with famous people.
That's a good one.
It's disappointing only, is it?
I think so.
We like to be downbeat on this show.
I thought we were going to have best and worst.
Let's keep it moribund.
All right.
Well, we could have some good ones as well.
Basically encounters with famous people, specifically your heroes.
If there's somebody who you kind of worshipped and always imagined what they would really be like and then maybe you ran into them or met them, did they live up or...
Do down your expectations.
Is that a phrase?
Do down.
That's the kind of duvet I have that's made from do down.
Do down.
So let's give the listeners some examples, but quickly we'll give you the text number.
It's 64046, or you can email adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk with your encounters with the famous.
You know, I was just thinking, sorry to go on a tiny bit of a tangent here, but
that very sad story.
I thought it was tragic about the Joel Schumacher incident with that being booed.
That's rough.
Well, that's an encounter with a famous person.
I guess it is, but I was thinking like it would be interesting not that it would ever happen.
But if you got like a load of celebrities to call in with their worst encounter with a normal people with a muggle.
What about, now that Sparks record, which was a great record we just heard there.
We met Sparks, didn't we?
When we did the Cure Awards.
Years ago.
Now they were, they're people you particularly like.
Yeah, but that was a painful day.
I don't know about you, Joe, but I didn't feel we did our best work hosting the Cure Awards.
No, well it's a tough gig.
But there we go.
That day I met Tom York from Radiohead.
I found myself, sort of, we gave them an award or something, didn't we?
And then I found myself walking off the stage with Tom York.
Uh, and he said to me, um, uh, how does he speak, Tommy, or what's his speaking voice like?
It's very much like his singing voice.
Kind of like that.
Well, he said to me, are you having a nice time, mate?
Is that a good impression?
Yeah, okay, well thanks.
I said, yeah, yeah, God, I'm having a brilliant time, you know.
It's just brilliant, you know, amazing just to be standing on a stage with you.
He said, oh, don't be stupid, shut up.
And not as if he was going, oh, don't be stupid.
It was like, don't, don't act.
You're making me sick.
You don't be stupid.
Shut up.
I went, oh.
That was pretty much that for my relationship with Tom York.
What do you say, though, to that?
If someone says, oh, you know, meeting people like you, it's amazing.
I'd say wicked.
Thanks.
It must be for you.
Do you want me to punch you?
Would that be wicked for you?
Yes, it probably would.
So there's my disappointing encounter with a famous person.
I tell you what my best encounter with a famous person would probably be when I interviewed Dustin Hoffman for BBC Radio 4.
He was amazing.
You know what?
I've got a Dustin Hoffman story as well.
Yeah, what's yours first then?
Well, it was just an interview and he was just really charming.
Yeah.
He talked about how tall I was and he said, I got this another good impression coming up.
He said, I got a brother who's really small, but he wishes he was tall.
So every time he comes through a door, he bends over as if it was too short for him.
That's a good anecdote.
Good anecdote.
Yeah, but he was just lovely.
That's lovely, isn't it, to make that effort to connect with you, especially someone like you.
It's true.
It is true.
You know what I mean?
And my Dustin Hoffman anecdote was when I was working as a...
a bartender in a fifties themed restaurant in the west end it was at the top of uh... somewhere called the trocadero which still exists the trocadero still exists in piccadilly circus but the restaurant doesn't it was called the rock island diner and i used to work there and my girlfriend at the time was one of the waitresses she was lovely beautiful uh... lady called karen and uh... one day Dustin Hoffman came in with his with his family and he was having a meal there
as suddenly he got up and he started, the DJ was playing a song, because we had a DJ in there who was playing a song by Elvis.
They used to encourage the punters to dance.
That's right, yeah.
And I DJ'd there occasionally, played a lot of fifties music and stuff, and I think maybe a Bobby Darin song came on beyond the sea or something.
Does Dustin start dancing?
Dancing Dustin?
Dustin got up!
And he started dancing with my girlfriend, Karen.
And he did an amazing job, though.
It was really beautiful.
He was a brilliant dancer.
And Karen was literally swept off her feet.
She was on roller skates.
And Karen was very tall as well.
And Hoffman's a little fella.
He's tiny.
I mean, he's really tiny.
So it was a sort of a funny sight.
But he was so graceful.
It was brilliant.
Everyone was just completely captivated, you know.
And it was an amazing moment.
And he was just totally charming.
Gave her a massive tip.
And he's the man.
So text us with your disappointing, I think we're focusing on, meetings with famous people.
People who you idolise, who maybe let you down or been a bit rude to you.
We can let successful meetings in there as well.
Yeah, but they're not as fun as disappointing ones.
Alright then, alright.
Text 64046 or email adamandjoe.6music at bbc.co.uk.
Joe, we've been invited to a Cajun dance party.
I'm busy.
Are you?
Oh, please come.
No, I can't.
Well, I'm going.
Here's analyse.
This is BBC6 Music.
Before that, you heard Amalays with Cajun Dance Party.
Adam, Amalays.
Oh, oh, oh, I know it's called Amalays.
I was saying analyse because I was handing you that copy of the book.
Something to analyse.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was saying analyse.
Can you analyse this?
Analise this?
Analise that.
Yeah?
Analyze This is a great film by, with Justin Hartman.
I know, and so is Analyze That is the sequel.
That's right.
What would the third one be called?
Um... Analyze This, Analyze That, Analyze The Other.
There you go!
There you go.
Nice.
That's why they didn't make it.
Um, you join us in the midst of the nation's favourite radio feature, Text The Nation, where we ask you to text us... things.
Um, and today we've asked you to text us your most disappointing encounters with celebrities.
And you can also email, incidentally.
Yeah.
Adam and Jo are in the jingle.
Stop.
Dot six music at bbc.co.uk.
Here we go.
Are you ready, Adam?
Yeah.
I met Adam and Jo at the NME Awards in 2000.
Adam bought me a drink.
Jo didn't.
From Emma Leatherbarrow in Sheffield.
Emma, did you have as bad a time as we had?
I left those awards because I thought it was a miserable event and I'd rather be anywhere else in the world.
At the Bratz.
We were there because we were picking up an award for Travis who were on tour at the time and they asked if we would go and pick up their award for them for Best Live Act.
And it was like a pathetic school assembly.
All the acts were trying to be as like anti-establishment as they possibly could.
They were all grumpy and throwing things and heckling.
But in a very pathetic way.
I mean, the atmosphere was charged with violence and animosity because Blur and Oasis were in the room together for the first time since their spat.
And Super Furry Animals were doing a lot of heckling and Mogwai were particularly vocal and just heckling absolutely everybody.
And Griff from the Super Furry Animals went up to collect one of the first awards of the night and Steve LaMac was hosting, I remember.
And Griff very, very slowly walked over to the podium and just pushed it over.
but pushed it over so slowly.
Everyone was watching it.
Was that him?
Yeah.
And it all just sort of like the sound of it now.
It kind of collapsed very slowly and then the mic fell over gradually and then there was a little bit of feedback and Steve LaMac was like, oh, the mic's falling over.
I have to pick that up.
And then Graff, you know, he sort of picked it up, but Graff kind of stayed on stage.
You know, there was no sort of like, there was no bravado.
It was like, that's for you, the man.
Okay.
The man.
How'd you like that?
I pushed over that thing.
He just pushed it over very slowly, then quite the wall.
And then he shook Steve LaMac's hand and then he went off and stuff like that again.
Here's another one, this is from Ross.
Paul Daniels stopped at traffic lights.
Mate taps on car window and screams.
Do some magic, you little turd.
Daniel's just sat there.
Disappointing.
Now, Ross, I wouldn't encourage that kind of behaviour.
Daniel's bought magic to many millions of people.
Seriously.
Absolutely, he's much misunderstood for the bad guys.
Yeah, you've got to value these people.
Imagine the poor man's life.
He drives around in a car with a fancy number plate, doesn't he?
I think it might be... Madge One Guy.
Or something like that.
Anyway, okay, here's another one from Roger in Norwich.
I got to meet Kim Deal after seeing the Pixies at Allie Pally, and she was completely lovely, cooler than you can possibly imagine.
I bet, I bet.
Thumbs up for Kim Deal.
Good one.
I'm not surprised by that.
Have you met Kim Deal?
Never met her.
Would love to meet her.
She's adorable.
She's absolutely... Apparently she really is.
Here's another one.
This is from Ellen from Liverpool.
My boyfriend Jim and I met Colin from Radiohead.
I was ready, poised with a camera.
What?
No, my boyfriend Jim and I met Colin from Radiohead.
I was ready poised with a camera when Jim asked for a photo with him, but Colin shut us down immediately, refusing point-blank.
No!
No photographs!
Well, it doesn't put the anecdote in context there.
Maybe it wasn't a good time, you know.
Do you know Colin?
I've met Colin.
Yeah, he's nice.
Nice guy.
He's very obliging as well.
He's not the kind of person that would shut someone down for no reason.
Maybe he's a vampire.
We need more context than that anecdote.
Maybe he doesn't.
come out in photos or mirrors we're going to have some more of these in just a second but first here's a track that you thoroughly approve of joe oh yeah this is great this is uh tribe called quest with check the rhyme i'm going to enjoy this the pigeon detectives take our back this is adam and joe on bbc6 music just coming up to nine o'clock we're here for another hour and a couple of minutes it's nearly the news but first here are some more responses to text the nation this has come in from gary ready for this adam yeah just to remind people we're talking about celebrity encounters mainly ones that were a great disappointment maybe some good ones too
Hey, Adam and Jo.
When I was a kid, I went to the motor show at the NEC.
At the top gear stand, I saw Jeremy Clarkson, the Clarkmeister.
I asked him to autograph my motor show program.
When he said to me, you're supposed to buy a top gear magazine for me to autograph, you little bustard.
Except he didn't say it like that, did he?
No, he said the word bustard properly.
I was gobsmacked.
I was only a kid.
Clarkson was my hero.
Quentin Wilson, who stood next to Clarkson, just looked down at me and said, just ignore him.
He's a... Now, how can I say this word?
Is it the C word?
A twit.
Just ignore him.
He's a twit.
Only with an A instead of the I.
Yeah.
That's pretty disappointing from Clarkson there.
Well Clarkson was just joshing surely.
Here's a good one.
This is from John David in Stretton.
Good morning gentlemen.
I met a really sober, just after filming Harry Potter, Gary Oldman at my graduation ball.
He's a total hero of mine, but sadly I was drunk when I was introduced.
I was told by the Dracula playing character that he liked my record collection, as I'd been DJing earlier that night, and I, in a blurred and impassioned tone, as if I was conveying information that he needed to know, in the embarrassingly forceful voice that only a drunk man produced, said, Oh, and I love your films!
To which he was ushered away like lightning away from my booze-tinged admiration.
That's okay, man.
You acquitted yourself admirably there.
I think Gary would have been happy with that.
Nothing to be worried about at all.
Anyway, it's time for the news now.
We'll have some more texts and some more... Oh, yes, yes, Joe's just reminding me.
Who the news is read by?
Who the news is read by.
In case there's another embarrassing slippage.
Look, I don't want any fights with the news guys.
So, maximum respect to Mike and Lucy reading the news for you now.
Nancy Boy by Placebo.
Placebo.
Now, what's his name?
Brian Molko, isn't it?
Brian Molko was someone who had a celebrity encounter with my dad.
Now, which was the biggest celebrity?
That's the question.
My dad interviewed Brian when we were at... It's rather insulting to Brian.
Well, yeah.
When we were at V97, we were backstage trying to get famous people to talk to my dad for our TV show, The Adam and Jo Show.
And Brian Mulco was one of the few people that agreed to chat to my... Your dad said, this is your boy or a girl.
Didn't know what sex Brian Mulco was.
Brian Mulco was absolutely charming, very nice indeed to my dad, unlike the stereophonics.
Oh.
They were a disgrace.
They had a pipe up their nose.
Yeah.
Is that an expression?
I don't know.
I don't know what that means.
A loof-ness.
They certainly did have pipes in their trousers.
And they were, they were so like kind of pathetic with him and they were just totally off, you know what I mean?
Like totally disrespectful to a 70 year old man.
I don't care whose father he is.
You know, you don't treat a septuagenarian that way.
You've got to have respect for the elders, it's one of the values that people have forgotten in anarchy UK.
And Kelly Jones was just sort of surly and off hand, and that guy, that goofbag that they fired, Richard Cable, whatever his name was, he was okay actually, he was the nicest one of the lot, but still he was just a bit of a jackass.
We're asking you, sorry to interrupt you there.
That's quite alright, that's pretty much it.
We're asking you to text in your most disappointing or exciting encounters with famous people, the text number 64046, or you can email Adam and Jo.6music at vbc.co.uk.
Here's one that's coming from Daniel from Durham.
I was able to interview famous psychic Derek Acora, and I was in awe of his psychic ability.
You know that, fella, don't you, Adam?
Yeah, yeah.
On Ghost Mostly Ghostly.
Sickly Sense, he does, doesn't he?
Does he do that?
He might do that.
That might be his solo show.
He's definitely on Mostly Ghostly a lot with Becky Turnbull, whatever her name is.
I'm just making up all the names.
Don't really watch those ghosty shows.
Anyway, I walked into the room.
He was smoking like a chimney and had a really growly voice until I switched on the microphone and his voice suddenly became ethereal and floaty for the benefit of the audience.
Can you imagine that?
Yeah.
What does his voice sound like before the microphone went on?
And what would you sound like when the microphone went on?
Hi!
That's exactly what it sounded like.
Hi Adam and Jo, this is from Brian in Belfast.
I have to admit I find it hard to watch Seinfeld star Michael Cramer Richards after an encounter in London a couple of years ago.
I would have thought you'd find it hard to watch him after his hideous racist outburst.
That's what I was thinking he was going to say.
This is before that.
We walked by a restaurant in Camden and my friend said, that was Kramer from Seinfeld back there.
I didn't believe her, but we walked back and indeed it was him.
After much deliberating, I decided to go up and ask him if he'd be OK if I had my picture taken with him.
He was at a table outside on his own in full view.
I thought it must be OK.
He must be all right with this sort of thing.
But when I asked him for a photo, he looked up all stroppy and just said, I'd rather eat.
What a gimp.
Now, you know, I have some sympathy for celebrities who don't like having their picture taken.
Well, of course.
It's very invasive and awkward, and if you're just a naturally shy person, it's no good.
And if you're properly famous, it can happen literally the entire time, especially because people have cameras on mobile phones.
Like I recently went with Simon Pegg and Nick Frost and Edgar Wright on their US promotional tour for Hot Fuzz.
And they're pretty famous out there.
And it can be impossible literally just to get down the street.
Right.
Because everybody has a camera and everybody wants a picture with you.
Yeah.
And the second you say no, they think you're a sodding one.
Yeah, that's true, isn't it?
However,
It's very easy to deal with those situations in a way that that lot Simon and Edgar and Nick are very good at.
You know, they're pretty much unfailingly obliging, aren't they?
And they deal with people who like their stuff very, very, well, that's all you have to do generally, because it's like their lives aren't completely taken over by it.
And Michael Richards, if he's going to decide to sit outside, as that bloke was saying, who was that that sent in that message?
I don't know.
No, it was Brian from Belfast.
Brian, I kind of agree with you there, you know, and it's very easy if you don't want your picture taken to be polite about it and not just kind of throw a little strop fit.
Yeah.
So that's two strikes against Richard, I reckon.
Richard, you're off on list.
Now, Joe, it's time for your breakfast single of the week.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This is our King Creosote.
This is called You've No Clue Do You.
That's the wonderful King Creosote with You've No Clue Do You.
None.
You've none clued.
That's our single of the week.
We're encouraging you to go out and buy his new album, which is coming out soon.
I'll tell you when it's coming out, September the 3rd.
It's going to be called Bombshell.
Can't believe it's September already, Jon.
The year's gone so far.
The older you get, the faster it goes.
Just whiz by it.
Seems like it was Christmas yesterday.
That's true, isn't it?
Yeah, lucky the summer's come back finally.
What a dream.
for summer.
Dreadful summer, absolutely awful summer.
Let's conquer already.
Autumn's come sooner than us.
Global warming, is it?
I don't know.
It's true, isn't it?
Come back faster every year.
George Bush is drunk on power.
It's going to be Christmas before you know it.
Yeah, Tony Blair's his poodle.
Christmas comes earlier every year, isn't it?
Probably start putting the lights up in September.
Titanic's a great film.
What a tragedy.
Titanic's brilliant.
I'll tell you a funny programme, eh?
Trigger Happy TV, have you seen it?
It's very easy.
Crazy stunts.
It's Adam and Jo on BBC 6 Music.
You join us in the middle of... That was just a bit of topical chat for you, some ideas for what you can talk about today.
We're in the middle of Text the Nation, the nation's favourite feature.
It's where we ask you to text us about things.
The number is 64046.
The email is adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk.
Okay, here we go.
Here's some more.
You ready, Adam?
Go on then.
This is from El Cid.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Whilst on holiday as a child, my cousin and I saw Lenny Bennett near our digs.
Oh, man.
We went over, excited like, and asked for his autograph.
He shot us a glance, lit a fag, and told us to beep off.
Oh, Bennett, who do you think it should be?
I think that's the correct reaction there.
Really?
Yeah.
No.
Somehow, I kind of admire celebrities who are just really rude.
Really?
Do you know?
Have you never been rude to anyone who's come up to you?
No, no, I'm always so excited.
Well, it doesn't happen to us that often, so we're always very pleased when it does.
Yeah, well, we're lucky because if people know who we are, they tend to like us.
If they don't like us, then they just don't know who we are.
Right?
If you're properly famous, everybody knows who you are, whether they like you or not.
That's true, exactly.
So you get like a critique from everybody.
Yeah, everyone's got an opinion.
Yeah.
Here's another one.
I had a childhood crush on Lenny Kravitz.
But when I met him, he wasn't the tall, dark, handsome man I dreamed of.
He is short and skinny with legs like a frog.
That's like me.
Says Juliet.
Legs like a frog.
Uh, so kind of bandy.
Mm-hmm.
And boingy.
Because he was an early pioneer of the tight trouser look, wasn't he?
Yeah!
He was.
He loves all that stuff.
The rock posturing.
Yeah.
He's a silly fellow.
He's apparently one of the nicest people on God's Green Earth.
Really?
Who's told you that?
Our old manager, Fenton.
Really?
Yeah.
The Crabbits.
He's hung out with him in LA and just says he's the best company.
Really?
He's really nice.
He's very sexy.
He's a good looking man.
He gets all the best looking girlfriends.
I bet he does.
Goodness.
But he's got legs like a frog.
He's got legs like a frog and... You better not go to France.
You'll get cooked off and eaten.
Very funny dog.
Very amusing.
French dish.
Very amusing.
I don't care for his music.
Really?
No.
By no means.
Here's another one from Chris in Forest Gate.
When I was about 13, I was using a phone box in the South Bank.
When I finished, I turned and saw Rod Hull waiting behind me.
I said, hello, Rod.
Where's the bird?
Oh, nice one.
Rod said beep off.
I'm sure he did.
Very disappointing.
Chris, that is not disappointing.
That is the correct response.
Where's the bird?
It's people like you, Chris, that make the world go round.
Well done.
This is Adam and Jo on BBC Six Music.
It's time for some music.
This is, oh, it's a free choice.
This is a track for anybody who's breaking up with their girlfriend today.
It's called Get Out of My Life, Woman.
It's by Lee Dorsey.
Text-a-nation!
Text, text, text!
Text-a-nation!
What if I don't want to?
Text-a-nation!
But I'm using email.
Is that a problem?
It doesn't matter, text!
That mixed really well, didn't it, that Calvin Harris entered the Text the Nation jingle.
Yeah, he should consider covering that, maybe.
He should integrate it into his set.
He played live in the hub yesterday, and you can listen again to his amazing set.
There were about 100 cameramen filming the set.
It was amazing.
It was an important event.
It was a real production number, and I think you can see the video online, can't you?
Yeah, you just go to BBC Six Music.
Uh, you don't need to give URLs anymore, do you?
You just pop that into Google?
Exactly.
Give it a whiz?
Mugs there is.
BBC Six music, and it's the Listen Again thing, isn't it?
You can hear this show on Listen Again.
I don't know why I'm saying that, because...
I think you're listening to it now or you're listening to it again and you already know that.
We're asking you to text in your encounters with famous people, disappointing or rewarding.
We'll do the last little link on this.
Here's a final little round up.
This is from Mike Hartley in Bury in Lancashire.
Many years ago whilst waiting at the taxi rank at Manchester Piccadilly train station on a boozy Friday night, we noticed that next to us in the queue was a rubby called train.
Cracker.
Hagrid.
Hagrid?
Harry Potter.
We said, wow, Robby Coltrane, hello.
And then the conversation ran dry.
At that point, my drunken friend Ian had a reality check, oh, thought a reality check was required and said, wow, you're actually much fatter than you look on the telly.
Oh, what?
Robby Coltrane did not look flattered.
It's all about the drunk friends in these emails.
Here's another one.
Yo Adam and Joe, good morning.
This is from Paul Evs in Deutschland.
I once met Richard Wilson at Tower Records in Piccadilly Circus.
I don't believe it.
You could be in this story.
He was there with some other celebrities, including the Pussy Galore woman, the actress who played Pussy Galore, for some Terrence Higgins Trust promo years and years ago.
I don't believe it.
Anyway, Wilson was flooded by autograph hunters and everyone was very polite.
My mate, Kempe.
Kempe sounds like a disaster.
My mate, Kempe.
Kempe.
My mate Kempe was hounding him to say, I don't believe it.
Go on, go on, would you say I don't believe it?
Oh, please.
Kempe.
Go on, Kempe, ask him.
What, mate?
Kempe will ask him.
Go on, say it, would you say it?
Go on, please.
In a very thespian voice, Richard Wilson politely refused, but the Kempster kept on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on.
Ooh, come on, bees!
We can't say old folks miss you!
Say oohs and say it!
Until Meldrew cracked.
Meldrew said, just bugger off, you little SH1T, and walked.
It's such a shame we can't swear on this programme.
That anecdote is ruined by the inability to say that word.
Just bugger off, you little sh1t.
And walked off.
I couldn't believe it.
The Kempmeister couldn't believe it either.
And Pussy Galore couldn't believe it.
I don't believe it.
That's brilliant, Paul.
I like the fact that you call him Kempe, the Kempster and the Kempmeister, all in one email.
If this was a competition, which it isn't because they'd been banned, that would win.
That would win.
Fair enough, I think.
There are some people, and Richard Wilson is one of them, who are so intimately associated with their most successful catchphrase, that there's like a physical imperative.
It's like a curse.
have to get them it's like Ricky Tomlinson you'd want him to say my ass otherwise you'd be very disappointed now speaking of asses here are the smashing pumpkins with that's the way my love is the smashing pumpkins with that's the way my love is this is Adam and Joe on BBC six music it's time for the news with Mickey and loose yep
Good news.
Thank God.
Hmm.
Well, there we go.
Ryan Adams.
With So Alive, this is Adam and Jo on the BBC Six Music Breakfast Show filling in for Sean W Keveny.
We've only got two and a bit shows left.
How do you know he's called Sean W Keveny?
Because somebody texted and said that he insists on being called W. Does he?
Is that not right, Jenny?
You work on his show, right?
He doesn't insist on it, but he can.
He doesn't?
I've been a fool.
I think his middle name begins with a W, doesn't he?
You're gonna get in trouble with the keys.
I'll tell you who else you're gonna get in trouble with, the newsroom.
Now, you might have heard that I referred to the newsreaders as Mickey and Loose.
I don't know if they like that.
I'm trying to bring a bit of levity to serious news, but just now, Lucy came into the studio.
She didn't look that happy about it.
I thought she looked lovely She looks lovely and she was talking about something else, but that I detected from her air that maybe we were like Trespassing on her territory.
Well, you know, they're they're serious journalist.
They're trained music news
that doesn't matter she's still a trained journalist news nothing that ever happened in music ever affected the world in any important way Joe said said Stephen Boston a journalist from America in an article that I disagreed with
It's time for a track from our album of the day by the Polyphonic Spree.
It's their new album.
It's called The Fragile Army.
This track is called Running Away.
We'll tell you a bit more about the Polyphonic Spree after we hear the track.
This is good stuff.
The polyphonic spree, the insane musical cult, that it would be okay to have your kids kidnapped by.
Is that something you just made up?
Yeah.
Oh, that's very good.
Don't you think that's true?
That's not something that Tom Boston said in an article once.
No, wasn't it Simon Boston?
Simon.
Oh, no.
Well, he might have.
He's a very perceptive journalist.
But if your kid was abducted by the Polyphonic Spree and taken to live in their camp and brainwashed and stuff, you wouldn't mind, would you really?
No, because the harmonies would just make your heart soar.
Exactly.
What if the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms
surrounded the Polyphonic Spree's camp like they did to David Koresh in Waco and attempted to throw gas canisters in and raid them.
How would they respond?
Well, they would sing about it, wouldn't they?
They'd sing the FBI down and they'd
Exactly, they probably use ultrasonic audio waves in the same way that during sieges the FBI play like bad music to flush people out, the polyphonic spree would be able to send back equal and opposite audio waves.
What was it then?
They played These Boots Are Made For Walking by Nancy.
Something over and over again during some sort of season.
It was either with David Koresh or it was with Gaddafi.
Someone like that.
Anyway, that was from our album of the day, the Polyphonic Spree's album The Fragile Army.
That was a track called Running Away.
It's their third album.
And here are some facts.
What's the matter?
Don't you want the facts?
Are they real or are you just making these ones out?
No, they've been written down.
Okay.
Tim Da Laughter, is that his name?
Yeah.
Wrote the soundtrack for Mike Mills's 2005 film Thumbsucker.
What's funny about that?
It's just when you read facts.
They sound unsubstantiated.
They sound like lies.
Hey, we just had an exciting incident here in the studio.
Mike the newsreader came up.
And he wasn't angry.
He was really nice.
He was fine about it.
And Lucy came up.
It's all like a big family here at the Big British Castle.
Yeah, yeah.
Everyone gets on fine.
Only quarter of an hour left of the show, Joe Cornish.
Hey, I should just say that you can hear more tracks from that Polyphonic Spree album throughout the day here on 6 Music.
That's excellent.
Um, is there anyone in the hub today?
I like to- Yeah, there's a band called Mum.
Mum?
Yeah, who are they?
They're like a- Is he the electronics guy?
They're an Icelandic group.
Hey, I'm into Mum.
Have they got an accent over the U there?
Or is that just a- Nym.
Nym.
Are they like the people that make the, um, the, um, No, the classy puddings that come in little ceramic pots?
Oh.
Are they called Mum?
No, they're called goo.
I don't like those because I don't like anything that's too, like, when you infantilize language like that.
What's the deal with putting a product in an actual proper bit of ceramic?
Do you know?
What about it?
It's good, isn't it?
Is it good?
Because you can use it again.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's a good thing.
Oh, for the environment you mean.
I don't know.
Just generally, why do people do it?
Every now and then you get just a product that would normally be in a throwaway plastic carton, but it's in a proper bit of sort of earthenware.
added value added value they can charge a bit more something you can keep a little souvenir paperclips and every time every time you pop a paperclip you can think oh i remember when i ate that chocolate pudding it was nice and now i can pop paperclips in it all good now suzy suit time doctor berry god is rejected the original baby love
How would he?
Why did he do that?
Why?
It's clashing with his blood.
What?
We're trying to... I'm trying to make a kind of a medical analogy there.
Oh, I see.
He's rejected it.
His body's rejected it.
Oh, right.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
We've got... Yeah, I wasn't even on board for any part of that whole thing.
Just move on, move on.
Hey, this is element Joe on BGC 6 Music.
We're coming into the last nine minutes of our show.
We've just been checking the results of the Band-Aid face-off, and it's not looking good for Adam Buxton.
not looking good in the least.
We'll play you some clips before the end of the show, just to remind you what the tracks are.
But I'm, I've only got 18 votes for Jane's Brain, which is my track, a rock track, and it rocks.
Joe's got something like 31 for his ludicrous European supermarket.
Everyone wants to hear European supermarket.
Even the title makes people feel happy.
Yeah, and it's all because of that sound.
It's not, man.
There's more to it than that.
It's not.
It's that sound.
There is so much.
All it takes is a sound.
The lyrics are amazing, I swear.
All it took for that song, Believe by Cher, people bought that song.
I was one of them because they liked the little effect.
They like the effect on her voice, and they thought, I'm gonna buy it, I'm gonna invest in that effect.
That's all they're doing.
Listen, let's go to the 6 Music website.
Click on Band Aid.
You'll hear a sample from my song and from Adam's song.
Vote for the one you like.
The sound of will play the full one on Friday.
If you want real songwriting craftsmanship.
I think James Brain is the one for you.
I think European supermarket is what...
Is the best now I've got a free choice and this is by a beautiful lady She's called Emily Haynes used to be in a band called metric who were kind of hard rocking Well, they said it would you describe them as emo Jenny?
I don't know if emo is right to describe them as emo.
You're the kind of person that would describe them as emo.
Only an idiot would do that.
I personally wouldn't describe them.
I don't put things in boxes like that.
I don't like categories.
I hate them.
Emily Haynes has got an album out with her band The Soft Skeleton and it's apparently very good.
Well, I've got it.
Are you gonna play it at any point?
Alright, this is a track called Doctor Blind.
That was lovely.
It's good, isn't it?
Yeah.
It's a very good album.
Emily Haynes and the soft skeleton in that track is called Doctor Blind.
This is Adam and Jo here on BBC 6 Music.
We're filling in for Sean Kievny only two more days after this, Thursday and Friday.
And that's it for us, unless there's an overwhelming response from the listeners and we are given our own radio station within the big British castle.
We'll settle for nothing but a station.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Um, that's not true.
Uh, yeah, so, uh, what now?
Well, we'd just like to thank everybody who texted us and messaged us today.
Um, thank you very much indeed.
If you responded to Text the Nation, there'll be more Text the Nation, the nation's favorite feature, tomorrow, and we want to encourage you to vote for our Band-Aid tracks.
Uh, do we have time just to play a little clip right now?
No, by no means.
No time.
There's no time.
So, can you do a little vocal rendition of yours, Joe?
European supermarket.
Which is butter?
Which is cheese?
Won't somebody help me, please?
Mini break in Amsterdam.
What's the flipping touch for ham?
There you go.
That's Joe Cornish's European supermarket.
Mine goes...
Her name was Jane, she had a brain and it lived in her head.
She used her brain to think of things that she didn't have.
She'd take her food and she'd think of houses.
And it goes on a bit like that.
But it's really good.
So, wow, those are acapella versions.
Sounds brilliant.
We could use those on the B side when we release them.
But that's it for us today.
So go on the Six Music website right now, bbc.co.uk, slash six music, whatever it is.
and vote for our Band-Aid tracks.
We'll play them in full on Friday.
We'll be back tomorrow at 7am.
Thanks for listening.
Here's Otis Reading.
I love you.
Bye!