WEBVTT 00:07.878 --> 00:14.801 It's a kind of music test of fuel in London Town With a lot of weirdos and unsavory types of grinding rights 00:30.416 --> 00:38.419 Went to bed at a reasonable hour Gotta be sharp on Saturday morning That's the secret of the Square Prince power 00:41.874 --> 00:45.476 Good morning Black Squadron, this is Adam Buxton speaking. 00:45.496 --> 00:50.780 Hey, this is Joe Cornish and we're joining you this morning live from Camden Town. 00:50.820 --> 00:51.581 Isn't that correct? 00:51.841 --> 00:53.122 That is in fact correct. 00:53.282 --> 00:58.085 We are here as part of the Camden Crawl, which Six Music is organising. 00:58.505 --> 00:59.226 Here it's very exciting. 00:59.286 --> 01:02.388 It's a two day festival in London Town and it's got bands. 01:03.208 --> 01:05.610 The Yeah Yeah Years were playing last night. 01:05.830 --> 01:08.873 We introduced Madness, playing on the top deck of a bus. 01:09.233 --> 01:10.594 The Fall are playing tonight. 01:10.814 --> 01:11.915 All kinds of good things going on. 01:12.196 --> 01:14.477 We're not going to see any of the actual music because we're too old. 01:14.878 --> 01:19.682 And there's an alarm that goes off if you're too old into some of the venues. 01:19.762 --> 01:22.504 Only Steve LaMac has the ability to bypass the alarm. 01:23.424 --> 01:25.205 But we're not allowed in, which is unfortunate. 01:25.225 --> 01:26.185 That's not true, of course. 01:26.625 --> 01:29.266 Camden Crawl is open and welcoming to everybody. 01:29.366 --> 01:31.346 Welcoming, welcoming, welcoming. 01:32.047 --> 01:35.948 We're joined here, though, in our makeshift studio, which is in a sort of a... What is it? 01:35.988 --> 01:38.629 A sort of a shed-stroke, barn-stroke... It's a bar, Joe. 01:38.649 --> 01:38.989 A bar? 01:40.049 --> 01:40.549 A bar. 01:40.650 --> 01:41.510 I remember bars. 01:42.291 --> 01:42.811 It's in a bar. 01:42.831 --> 01:47.454 We're in a bar in Camden and we're joined by 20 elite listeners. 01:47.814 --> 01:50.776 All members of Black Squadron by default because they are here. 01:50.817 --> 01:55.059 You know, just to remind you that if you're listening now, you are part of Black Squadron. 01:55.079 --> 02:00.423 Black Squadron are the people that listen to this programme for the first half hour live as it goes out. 02:00.463 --> 02:06.127 The people that tune in from nine o'clock until nine thirty in the morning on a Saturday, right? 02:06.227 --> 02:07.188 Not listening again. 02:07.648 --> 02:13.414 You're not part of Black Squadron if you're listening again, not downloading the podcast, but actually listening live. 02:13.834 --> 02:16.316 So we've got Squadron, 20 Squadron members here. 02:16.356 --> 02:17.618 We're very excited to have them. 02:18.118 --> 02:19.479 Clean cut, young men and women. 02:19.840 --> 02:21.642 They're all staring at us at the moment. 02:22.282 --> 02:25.826 Every single pair of eyes, 40 pair of eyes staring at us. 02:25.886 --> 02:27.567 What do you think of Squadron Joe? 02:27.808 --> 02:29.209 I think they're magnificent. 02:29.249 --> 02:30.330 They're a beautiful sight. 02:30.370 --> 02:31.731 They're so powerful. 02:32.752 --> 02:38.934 attractive, intelligent, they make a high-pitched ultrasonic squealing sound when you bake them. 02:39.174 --> 02:49.178 Just to prove that we're live there, because we've got the playback going in the market bar here where we are, but that was a little bit too much playback and it caused the feedback. 02:49.418 --> 02:52.759 Here's a letter from Nick, a letter, an email, that's what it is. 02:53.459 --> 02:59.361 He says, and still there's a few people out there who are confused about whether they are or are not part of Black Squadron, 02:59.981 --> 03:04.143 He says that he's one of the people that has to download the show. 03:04.163 --> 03:09.184 He catches it via iPlayer because he's not able to listen live on a Saturday morning. 03:09.564 --> 03:11.005 He's not part of Black Squadron. 03:11.285 --> 03:12.606 You are not part of Black Squadron. 03:12.906 --> 03:18.928 I was thinking that we should create a new squadron for the people that listen via iPlayer, right? 03:19.648 --> 03:20.408 via iaplay. 03:20.428 --> 03:29.871 Well hang on, we've discussed various squadrons in the past, we've discussed Black Squadron, there's been mention of Phantom Squadron, there's also been mention of Slack Squadron, hasn't there? 03:29.891 --> 03:40.014 Now my understanding is Black Squadron Listen Live in the UK and Ireland, Phantom Squadron Listen Live via Listen Again, Slack Squadron Listen Live via the podcast, 03:40.814 --> 03:47.137 And I thought of a new squadron who are called Globes Squadron, who listen live in a foreign time zone. 03:47.557 --> 03:48.737 And have large breasts. 03:49.758 --> 03:52.018 Possibly, but that would then rule out men. 03:52.899 --> 03:53.699 Not my kind of men. 03:55.300 --> 03:56.180 Okay then, fair enough. 03:57.240 --> 03:58.421 So those are the squadrons, right? 03:59.041 --> 04:00.342 Are they not going to be upset by that? 04:00.362 --> 04:04.983 I was thinking Digiforce for the people that listen via the iPlayer. 04:05.043 --> 04:07.504 Well, I guess there could be subsets and different names. 04:07.584 --> 04:12.366 Yeah, because Black Squadron covertly operate as the 9 o'clock club. 04:12.926 --> 04:17.528 That's true, you know, just to fool certain people into thinking they're like a little kiddie club. 04:17.688 --> 04:20.449 Whereas actually, they're an elite listening force! 04:21.469 --> 04:46.019 We had a member of black squadron doing some amazing work has Joe's been issuing commands for black squadron in previous shows And this from Nick is one of those he says in response to a call to action We have initiated a search and destroy tactic on all the offending media He's talking about the photographs of us me and Joe that were in the Guardian magazine a few weeks back Hmm and Joe was particularly upset by the unflattering nature of the squadron to destroy 04:46.459 --> 04:48.900 Destroy the Guardian, and Nick's daughter, what's her name? 04:48.940 --> 04:49.180 Kia. 04:49.540 --> 04:56.524 She sent in, or they both sent in, some fantastic photos of Kia putting the Guardian weekend magazine in a blender. 04:56.544 --> 05:00.185 Not the whole magazine, because it's a fab magazine, yeah. 05:00.445 --> 05:01.746 You wouldn't want to destroy the whole mag. 05:01.826 --> 05:02.226 Quite right. 05:02.286 --> 05:04.707 All they did was destroy the actual pictures of us. 05:05.048 --> 05:06.888 Yeah, we're going to... Greasy and spotty and old. 05:07.088 --> 05:12.531 We're going to put those pictures of the pictures being blending up on the blog, the website. 05:12.771 --> 05:14.733 So thanks very much, Nick, and thank you to Kia. 05:14.753 --> 05:23.701 We're going to maybe get some suggestions for Commands for Black Squadron after this next track, but this is dedicated to Kia. 05:23.741 --> 05:24.462 Thank you very much. 05:24.662 --> 05:30.007 It's The Flaming Lips with Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots, or whatever the heck it's called. 05:30.047 --> 05:30.388 Here it is. 05:31.168 --> 05:32.869 Excuse me, sorry about that. 05:34.449 --> 05:35.409 What a frightful stench. 05:35.429 --> 05:36.429 What an absolute stench. 05:37.070 --> 05:39.530 That was the Flaming Lips with Yoshimi Battles of Pink Robots. 05:39.550 --> 05:42.191 This is Adam and Joe here, coming live from the Camden Crawl. 05:42.211 --> 05:42.851 We're in a room. 05:43.231 --> 05:46.712 It's got people in it, young people, good-looking young men and women. 05:47.292 --> 05:53.634 You know, if there was a cataclysm outside this room, Joe, we think this would be a good start point to repopulate the planet. 05:53.714 --> 05:54.354 Absolutely. 05:54.514 --> 05:56.555 We could make a very good-looking race of people. 05:56.575 --> 05:59.576 Some of the best DNA in the country is right here. 05:59.596 --> 06:00.236 Yeah. 06:01.496 --> 06:03.898 I'm not even gonna think about that prospect any any longer. 06:04.478 --> 06:05.458 Are you bought it up? 06:05.638 --> 06:06.179 I know I did. 06:06.219 --> 06:06.959 I'm sorry about that. 06:06.979 --> 06:22.587 I took it into a dirty area So listen, you are all members of black squadron not only here in the market bar in Camden But also listening at home and we have some commands for you who are they've been selected by Elite black squadron members here the commands aren't people are they not? 06:22.787 --> 06:23.767 Yeah, you refer to them. 06:23.827 --> 06:24.468 You said who are 06:25.368 --> 06:27.351 Right, that's true, I did still pick you up on that. 06:27.391 --> 06:32.058 But they're good commands, they've been thought up by the Elite Black Squadron conference that's happening here. 06:32.519 --> 06:34.642 And there's three there for you to choose from, Adam, what do you reckon? 06:35.063 --> 06:37.106 First command, shall I say them? 06:37.126 --> 06:39.470 I think you should just choose one and read out the one that you pick. 06:40.456 --> 06:40.957 Hmm. 06:41.317 --> 06:43.981 Well, there's an obvious one staring at me. 06:44.201 --> 06:44.481 Do it. 06:45.042 --> 06:46.604 Take off all your clothes. 06:47.065 --> 06:48.807 That's the Black Squadron command this morning. 06:49.007 --> 06:51.551 What about the squadron members who are here with us, though? 06:52.211 --> 06:55.376 Uh, they are exempt, I think. 06:55.496 --> 06:56.697 It's too early in the show. 06:57.338 --> 06:58.838 Can they take off some of their clothes? 06:59.399 --> 07:00.059 If they want to. 07:00.479 --> 07:01.399 They're exempt, you know? 07:01.439 --> 07:03.260 This is like the G20 conference. 07:03.420 --> 07:05.921 They don't have to abide by the same rules as the populace. 07:06.001 --> 07:08.361 Otherwise, this is the kind of thing that Russell Brand used to do, isn't it? 07:08.461 --> 07:10.022 I know, and we can't get into that area. 07:10.062 --> 07:12.743 We'll only become amazingly successful, and that will be awful. 07:14.523 --> 07:15.104 So there you go. 07:15.144 --> 07:18.005 That was suggested by Laura, a squadron member here in Camden. 07:18.265 --> 07:20.046 Take off all your clothes, Black Squadron. 07:20.386 --> 07:21.667 Let us know how it goes for you. 07:22.367 --> 07:23.408 Don't break any laws. 07:23.668 --> 07:26.590 Yeah, what happens if there's a family listening, for instance? 07:27.230 --> 07:29.411 Or, you know, it's a difficult command. 07:29.431 --> 07:30.572 It is a tough one, isn't it? 07:30.832 --> 07:34.133 Maybe I should have gone for a less controversial one. 07:34.373 --> 07:38.716 Well, no, I think it's really going to sort the... But it should be controversial to take off all your clothes. 07:39.516 --> 07:39.876 Why not? 07:39.896 --> 07:41.157 It's a natural state, right? 07:41.537 --> 07:41.797 Right. 07:41.877 --> 07:42.678 Even though it's illegal. 07:43.778 --> 07:46.199 It's really going to sort the wheat out from the chaff though, isn't it? 07:46.279 --> 07:47.760 This week's Black Squadron command. 07:48.300 --> 07:49.140 Send us some pictures. 07:49.560 --> 07:50.741 We'd love to see how it goes. 07:51.521 --> 07:53.362 But that's your Command Black Squadron. 07:53.602 --> 07:55.703 Right now it's time to play some more fantastic music. 07:56.123 --> 07:59.985 And this is CSS with Let's Make Love and Listen to Death from Above. 08:00.885 --> 08:04.727 That was CSS with let's make love and listen to death from above. 08:04.747 --> 08:07.388 This is Adam and Joe here at the Camden Crawl. 08:07.749 --> 08:09.650 We're coming live. 08:09.710 --> 08:10.230 There we go. 08:11.010 --> 08:12.271 Suddenly it just popped into my headphones. 08:12.291 --> 08:17.674 I don't know if you could hear me speaking at home there, listeners, but I didn't hear anything in my headphones and I was a little perturbed for a second, but it's all fine. 08:17.694 --> 08:18.194 It's all fine. 08:18.234 --> 08:18.694 Calm down. 08:18.794 --> 08:20.155 Do you answer me this, right? 08:20.195 --> 08:21.556 Adam Buckson and listeners at home. 08:21.656 --> 08:25.498 Do you care that the right side of your headphones is on your right ear? 08:26.158 --> 08:26.899 Yeah, definitely. 08:27.299 --> 08:29.901 Before you put them on, you check for the little R and L. Always check. 08:30.041 --> 08:31.042 Yeah, I do as well. 08:31.062 --> 08:31.743 Do you think it matters? 08:32.063 --> 08:32.744 Very much so. 08:32.804 --> 08:36.166 What happens if you listen for a sustained period with them the wrong way round? 08:36.247 --> 08:38.669 Well, the two hemispheres of your brain become inverted. 08:38.849 --> 08:40.850 Right, you get synaptic disconnections. 08:40.870 --> 08:42.191 Shut down, synaptic shutdown. 08:42.211 --> 08:43.473 Yeah, global, lobal... 08:44.213 --> 08:44.473 Yeah. 08:44.513 --> 08:44.953 Conflict. 08:45.374 --> 08:45.794 Conflict. 08:45.814 --> 08:46.594 Global conflict. 08:46.614 --> 08:47.455 Global conflict. 08:47.555 --> 08:47.775 Yeah. 08:48.075 --> 08:49.236 Global ballistic conflict. 08:49.336 --> 08:50.236 It's very dangerous. 08:50.497 --> 08:55.739 And the thing that annoys me is, you know, there's usually on these big chunky headphones that we're wearing, right? 08:56.420 --> 08:59.001 The cord comes out of one side. 08:59.301 --> 08:59.922 Yeah. 09:00.042 --> 09:01.923 Doesn't come out of both of them. 09:02.103 --> 09:03.904 As it does on smaller ones, right? 09:04.384 --> 09:04.884 Right, fun. 09:05.584 --> 09:07.005 This is a good conversation to chat, isn't it? 09:07.365 --> 09:15.587 But sometimes it comes out of the left side, I think it should always come out of one side, because sometimes you think there should be an international standard for headphone cables. 09:15.607 --> 09:21.769 And all headphones should have a very large white L or an R. I didn't realise I was going to spark such a rant. 09:21.789 --> 09:23.150 It's something I care very deeply about. 09:23.170 --> 09:23.550 Clearly. 09:24.230 --> 09:26.491 But listen, we are coming live from Camden. 09:26.511 --> 09:38.076 Of course, listeners, if you can hear a peculiar acoustic, it's the sound of a beautiful but slightly stinky bar here in Camden filled with 20 elite Black Squadron listeners. 09:38.236 --> 09:39.136 It's like a kind of barn. 09:39.176 --> 09:43.118 It's a bit like in Witness when the Amish people erect a barn. 09:43.138 --> 09:43.578 Do you remember? 09:43.898 --> 09:44.219 Yes. 09:44.339 --> 09:49.401 Well, in this case, it was just a load of drunk people in Camden who erected a beautiful barn. 09:49.901 --> 09:50.802 Well, they've done very well. 09:50.862 --> 09:51.562 And we're sat in it. 09:52.023 --> 09:56.526 But a few moments ago, we issued a command to Black Squadron, which was, take off all your clothes. 09:56.886 --> 10:01.790 And we've been thinking about this and thinking it might be a difficult command for some Squadron members to execute. 10:01.810 --> 10:03.452 Well, there's a lot of families listening, aren't there? 10:03.952 --> 10:06.694 Now, luckily, we didn't think of the command. 10:06.894 --> 10:07.074 No. 10:07.335 --> 10:10.957 We asked our elite Squadron members to think of some suggestions. 10:11.057 --> 10:16.281 And that one was generated by Laura, who I believe we have a roving mic. 10:17.102 --> 10:17.622 pointed at. 10:17.783 --> 10:18.303 Hello Laura. 10:18.423 --> 10:18.543 Hi. 10:18.563 --> 10:19.504 How are you doing? 10:19.544 --> 10:28.471 So listen, you issued this command and we're abdicating responsibility and in a cowardly way throwing the spotlight of public hubris. 10:29.071 --> 10:31.213 Yeah, is there a spotlight of public hubris? 10:31.233 --> 10:31.693 There is now. 10:31.894 --> 10:33.435 Yeah, well it's shining on you. 10:34.015 --> 10:39.680 What should people do, for instance, if they're in a family scenario or maybe on public transport at the moment? 10:40.407 --> 10:41.387 Just go with it, I think. 10:41.747 --> 10:42.067 Really? 10:42.307 --> 10:45.608 I mean, like you said earlier, there should be no problem with just taking your clothes off. 10:45.928 --> 10:46.288 Right. 10:46.408 --> 10:47.528 It's illegal. 10:48.209 --> 10:49.049 Is that a problem? 10:49.249 --> 10:50.209 That's a problem, isn't it? 10:50.309 --> 10:53.250 It's indecency in public from a legal perspective. 10:53.270 --> 10:57.490 But you can find objects that you can place in front of... Ah, lost in powers. 10:57.990 --> 10:58.891 Good thinking, right. 10:58.931 --> 10:59.911 That is good thinking. 11:00.471 --> 11:02.931 So family members just need to get creative with the command. 11:02.951 --> 11:05.792 The thing is, Laura, that only works from a single point of view, doesn't it? 11:06.570 --> 11:06.910 Yeah. 11:07.771 --> 11:18.998 So if you move round... Well, what if you're being looked at, you know, the person to your right might not be able to seal bits and bobs because of a coffee cup, but the person to your left could have a clear view of the bobs and bits. 11:19.939 --> 11:20.719 Or bobs bits. 11:21.019 --> 11:22.500 Are you more worried about the bobs than the bits? 11:23.201 --> 11:24.382 I don't know, it's the combination. 11:24.402 --> 11:27.544 Well, I would say try to shadow the areas. 11:28.124 --> 11:28.444 Yes. 11:29.205 --> 11:31.046 I would say try two shadowy areas. 11:32.347 --> 11:33.388 That's the perfect answer. 11:33.428 --> 11:33.849 Say no more. 11:34.169 --> 11:37.712 Yeah, but it kind of counteracts the point of taking your clothes off, doesn't it? 11:37.732 --> 11:40.294 Take your clothes off, then hide in shadowy areas. 11:42.066 --> 11:44.547 It's the shadowy areas you're trying to hide in the first place. 11:45.528 --> 11:47.128 Listen, Laura, thank you very much, though. 11:47.208 --> 11:51.250 We leave it up to families to interpret the command in a decent way themselves. 11:51.650 --> 11:52.391 We don't want to cause any risks. 11:52.411 --> 11:52.711 How about this? 11:52.751 --> 11:54.331 Families should put extra clothes on. 11:54.351 --> 11:55.012 How about that? 11:55.352 --> 11:55.612 Yeah. 11:56.052 --> 11:56.512 That's great. 11:56.552 --> 11:57.513 That solves all the problems. 11:57.573 --> 11:58.353 All problems solved. 11:58.613 --> 12:01.034 Now I've got my free play right now to take us into the news. 12:01.494 --> 12:04.795 This is a track that I stuck on a compilation for A Card Journey this week. 12:04.835 --> 12:06.175 It went down very well. 12:06.355 --> 12:06.695 Did it? 12:06.896 --> 12:07.676 Very well. 12:07.716 --> 12:08.556 With The Wife and Kiddles. 12:08.596 --> 12:08.856 Yeah. 12:09.036 --> 12:15.758 Neil Diamond with a very moving and wonderful song about a man called Mr. Bojangles. 12:16.158 --> 12:16.638 No, no, wait. 12:16.798 --> 12:17.919 I said the wrong one, didn't I, Ben? 12:17.979 --> 12:20.059 Or can you flip to the... Okay. 12:20.660 --> 12:21.600 Right, we're going into this one. 12:22.060 --> 12:23.281 After that introduction as well. 12:23.581 --> 12:25.481 Luckily this... Is it not Mr. Bojangles? 12:25.541 --> 12:26.742 It's not Mr. Bojangles, no. 12:27.182 --> 12:32.424 Luckily this track's got a one minute long preamble before it actually gets into the body of the song. 12:32.444 --> 12:33.104 Oh, that's lucky. 12:33.205 --> 12:43.249 So I can fill by telling you that this is a track by Howard Devoto, lead singer of magazine from his solo album Jerky Versions of the Dream, one of my favourite solo albums. 12:43.589 --> 12:46.270 And this is a track that my mum enjoys very much, you know? 12:46.670 --> 12:51.612 She's a big fan of magazine, obviously, and she likes this one which is called Rainy Season. 12:56.724 --> 13:04.889 Stand down, your work is done You've earned yourself a nice warm bath And maybe a nice little bargain mark 13:07.975 --> 13:10.296 Just signing out Black Squadron there. 13:10.336 --> 13:11.897 You can relax Black Squadron. 13:12.137 --> 13:15.619 Yeah, you can put your clothes on or take the surplus clothes off now. 13:15.639 --> 13:16.619 All right. 13:17.240 --> 13:24.583 And just to remind you, this is Adam and Joe here at the Camden Crawl and we're in the market bar in Camden Town having a good time. 13:24.623 --> 13:28.825 We're joined by around about 20 of our listeners, 20 Black Squadron members. 13:29.305 --> 13:34.368 We should try and get them to make some kind of collective sound so listeners at home can envisage them. 13:34.428 --> 13:36.309 So I wonder what they would reply with. 13:37.049 --> 13:41.853 If I said, Stephen, there you go, you see. 13:41.873 --> 13:42.753 Yeah, come on. 13:43.234 --> 13:43.454 That's good. 13:43.474 --> 13:50.679 We're going to be talking about Stephen a bit later on, because there's a certain amount of antipathy controversy, whatever you want to call it about Stephen. 13:50.699 --> 13:57.284 And we'd very much like to canvas the mood here in the Camden crawl bar area. 13:57.644 --> 13:58.545 We'll do that later on. 13:59.105 --> 14:03.508 But right now I want to talk about something that catch up on something we were talking about last week. 14:04.048 --> 14:05.349 Someone sent us an email. 14:05.489 --> 14:08.411 It was Tom in Clapham and also Patrick Boyle, I think. 14:08.491 --> 14:19.879 He says, in response to the lock the taskbar thing that we were talking about, we were talking about things last week that make your life more entertaining that you do on your own. 14:20.359 --> 14:28.625 And someone was saying that when they see the command lock the taskbar on their computer, they sing to the tune of the Clash song, Rock the Casbar. 14:29.085 --> 14:31.427 Lock the taskbar, lock the taskbar. 14:31.727 --> 14:42.455 So, Tom and Clapham and Patrick say that we are often sing, crossing the road, crossing the road, to the tune of the Judas Priest song, Breaking the Law, whenever they're crossing the road. 14:42.936 --> 14:46.819 Crossing the road, crossing the road, eh, eh, crossing the road, crossing the road. 14:47.279 --> 14:47.559 Wow. 14:48.040 --> 14:48.360 So we... 14:49.841 --> 14:51.282 Well, that was genuine awe. 14:51.882 --> 14:53.824 That's what I say when I'm genuinely awed. 14:53.884 --> 15:05.031 And they also sing, when they're cooking with meat, like chicken for example, or bacon, they sing, It's chicken for me, save all your chicken for me. 15:05.411 --> 15:08.113 Bye-bye, bacon, bye-bye. 15:08.273 --> 15:08.594 Wow. 15:08.974 --> 15:09.174 Yeah? 15:09.995 --> 15:12.856 Are they locked away in any sense? 15:13.817 --> 15:14.577 That's good, though, isn't it? 15:14.597 --> 15:23.060 I mean, don't you sing... Are we maybe looking for other contemporary songs or pop songs that could be applied to everyday tasks? 15:23.300 --> 15:24.361 Well... No. 15:25.021 --> 15:26.121 We're not looking for that. 15:26.141 --> 15:30.162 I'm curious about other songs that people do sing like as a matter of course. 15:30.182 --> 15:31.163 Do you not do that at all? 15:32.083 --> 15:33.004 I just have to have a think. 15:33.044 --> 15:34.104 I'm not sure that I do. 15:34.265 --> 15:35.245 I'd have to have a proper old think. 15:35.265 --> 15:36.186 Chicken for me. 15:36.506 --> 15:37.967 Save all your chicken for me. 15:37.987 --> 15:39.328 No, I'm definitely not going to sing that one. 15:39.728 --> 15:41.109 Bye, bye, bacon. 15:41.409 --> 15:41.970 Bye, bye. 15:41.990 --> 15:43.231 Just before you pop it in your tummy. 15:43.431 --> 15:43.991 It's a good song. 15:44.071 --> 15:48.714 I did a little jingle about... Do you remember I was talking about my fish fingers last week? 15:48.734 --> 15:51.676 When I run out of fish fingers, I sing a little song to myself sometimes. 15:51.756 --> 15:51.997 Yeah. 15:52.637 --> 15:53.437 Don't say it. 15:53.457 --> 15:55.259 My stomach's making peculiar noises, yeah. 15:55.339 --> 15:55.899 But keep talking. 15:56.079 --> 15:58.341 Okay, well, I've done a little jingle to celebrate the fact. 15:58.681 --> 15:59.161 Oh, good one. 15:59.261 --> 15:59.622 Here it is. 16:00.470 --> 16:03.171 Oh no, we've got no fish fingers. 16:04.191 --> 16:07.373 No fish fingers in the fridge or the freezer drawer. 16:07.693 --> 16:08.193 Damn it! 16:08.673 --> 16:11.894 I was sure that we had loads of golden fingers. 16:12.654 --> 16:16.316 But it appears that I was wrong and there ain't no more. 16:16.436 --> 16:16.976 Fish fingers! 16:18.709 --> 16:23.192 So what, that you would sing that out loud without the musical accompaniment around the house? 16:23.232 --> 16:23.952 Yeah, I would, yeah. 16:24.152 --> 16:24.492 Yeah. 16:25.013 --> 16:25.693 That's good though. 16:25.833 --> 16:26.914 Only if there's no fish fingers. 16:26.954 --> 16:28.255 I don't just randomly sing it. 16:28.275 --> 16:29.015 I'm not insane. 16:29.275 --> 16:31.877 It's sort of like living with Jack Nicholson out of The Shining. 16:32.717 --> 16:33.878 But a musical version. 16:34.638 --> 16:36.619 Yeah, it's like living with Jack Nicholson out of The Shining. 16:36.899 --> 16:38.739 If he's found out, he's got no fish fingers. 16:39.199 --> 16:43.060 Which would legitimately cause him to go on a killing rampage. 16:43.440 --> 16:45.581 Anyway, we're going to play some music for you right now. 16:45.821 --> 16:47.501 We've got Polly Scattergood coming up. 16:47.541 --> 16:49.882 This track, she's from Colchester in Essex. 16:50.042 --> 16:51.322 She attended the Brit school. 16:51.582 --> 16:52.263 She's a graduate. 16:52.283 --> 16:54.163 The Brits is where all the stars come from now. 16:54.343 --> 16:55.083 A lot of them do. 16:55.143 --> 16:56.344 The Noisettes, don't they? 16:56.364 --> 16:57.324 I think one of them or two of them. 16:57.364 --> 16:58.064 I think all of them do. 16:58.384 --> 16:58.784 All of them. 16:59.624 --> 17:01.325 Her track is called Please Don't Touch. 17:02.065 --> 17:05.191 presumably a follow-up to tidy up your room and stay off the grass. 17:11.758 --> 17:12.178 Very good. 17:12.319 --> 17:14.961 That was Polly's Scattergood there with Please Don't Touch. 17:15.141 --> 17:16.062 This is Adam and Joe here. 17:16.082 --> 17:17.404 We're coming live from the Camden Crawl. 17:17.884 --> 17:24.070 And yesterday, we made a little trip into Camden just to check out the vibes, yeah? 17:24.351 --> 17:31.277 Yeah, Camden is an area of London that's famous for gigs and getting drunk. 17:31.358 --> 17:31.998 Very good. 17:32.078 --> 17:32.759 Is that correct? 17:32.779 --> 17:34.361 Yeah, I've got some facts about Camden. 17:34.381 --> 17:34.641 Really? 17:35.161 --> 17:36.743 Yeah, there's a lock there. 17:36.883 --> 17:42.109 This is for people who maybe have never been to Camden or don't know what it is What kind of locks you unlock? 17:42.909 --> 17:53.500 No, it's just It's just a normal kind of a lock Since the dawn of time witches and warlocks have sold trinkets to teenagers at Camden 17:54.821 --> 17:57.544 And you can find all sorts of famous people in Camden. 17:57.724 --> 17:59.665 Well, you know, that's how Camden got its name. 17:59.845 --> 18:00.106 Is it? 18:00.786 --> 18:11.054 Originally in Dickensian times it was there was a fellow who was known as Camp Den and he had like a shop where he sold Dickensian t-shirts. 18:11.615 --> 18:11.855 Did he? 18:11.975 --> 18:18.120 Yeah, some of the ones the most popular ones were the slogans included You're taking the peeps 18:18.800 --> 18:19.100 Nice. 18:20.041 --> 18:23.345 And Fogging Hell, it's another piece super. 18:23.785 --> 18:24.046 Right. 18:24.266 --> 18:26.588 That was a big seller back in Camp Den. 18:26.848 --> 18:27.049 Yeah. 18:27.369 --> 18:27.609 Yeah. 18:27.629 --> 18:28.230 Are you enjoying these? 18:28.410 --> 18:28.810 Yes. 18:33.515 --> 18:36.879 There was a very controversial t-shirt they used to sell. 18:36.939 --> 18:38.901 It had ripped sleeves and the slogan was 18:39.141 --> 18:41.964 That's the last time I lent Jack my t-shirt. 18:42.084 --> 18:42.785 Jack the Ripper? 18:42.865 --> 18:43.786 Yep, got that one. 18:44.046 --> 18:44.547 I'm on that one. 18:44.567 --> 18:45.868 Because it was in bad taste, right? 18:46.108 --> 18:46.308 Yes. 18:46.349 --> 18:47.510 And that's provocative t-shirts. 18:47.570 --> 18:48.351 It was very provocative. 18:48.371 --> 18:48.871 The kids love that. 18:49.151 --> 18:50.933 And they shut Camp Den down. 18:50.993 --> 18:51.354 Did they? 18:51.574 --> 18:52.175 For a while. 18:52.435 --> 18:58.101 And the other reason he was known as Camp Den was because he always had a fruity response when people came into the shop, you know? 18:58.281 --> 19:00.163 Yeah. 19:00.543 --> 19:01.644 Come into the shop. 19:02.321 --> 19:02.742 That's very pretty. 19:02.762 --> 19:03.765 You're welcome in. 19:05.349 --> 19:06.612 No wonder he was called Camp Dan. 19:06.692 --> 19:07.173 Exactly. 19:07.193 --> 19:09.419 Because he always said things that had a slight double entendre. 19:09.760 --> 19:11.183 Have a look at all the stuff! 19:12.279 --> 19:13.100 Oh, that's filthy. 19:13.180 --> 19:14.601 Filthy, absolutely filthy stuff. 19:15.241 --> 19:18.703 And that's why Camden is known as Camden, thanks to Camp Den. 19:18.844 --> 19:21.966 Oh, thanks to Adam Buxton for that historical info. 19:22.126 --> 19:25.848 But are we going to play the listeners the little thing we recorded yesterday? 19:25.948 --> 19:27.930 We're going to play another track and then we're going to play it. 19:28.270 --> 19:30.091 But we should set the scene for them. 19:30.111 --> 19:33.914 We went wandering around and we felt that we were not correctly dressed, really. 19:33.934 --> 19:35.975 You look like Brian Ferry yesterday. 19:36.275 --> 19:40.256 I made some bad clothing choices and we had to rectify that at the last minute. 19:40.856 --> 19:41.956 You looked like such a smoothie. 19:41.996 --> 19:42.976 I mean, you looked handsome. 19:43.236 --> 19:44.857 My mum would have been very attracted to you. 19:45.337 --> 19:49.978 I knew as I left the house that I'd chosen the wrong clothes for a Friday in Camden. 19:50.398 --> 19:58.880 I had a sort of quite nicely pressed shirt and then some quite clean jeans and then some sunglasses. 19:58.980 --> 20:00.340 Some very tasteful Ray-Bats. 20:00.580 --> 20:03.182 Yeah, and I just look like some kind of awful yuppie. 20:04.042 --> 20:05.743 Oh, and I think you look like a nice yuppie. 20:06.084 --> 20:06.464 Thank you. 20:07.024 --> 20:14.149 Anyway, we're going to play you the fruits of our foray into Camden after this next track, which is The Police. 20:14.689 --> 20:18.132 And I used to get very embarrassed when this track came on the radio. 20:18.152 --> 20:19.172 Because it's about prostitution. 20:19.232 --> 20:19.713 Exactly. 20:19.773 --> 20:27.558 And when it would come on and my family was there, I would try and talk loudly over it because I wouldn't want them to think that I was listening to a track about prostitution. 20:28.138 --> 20:28.719 God forbid. 20:28.759 --> 20:29.499 And now look at you. 20:29.860 --> 20:30.420 Now look at me. 20:30.700 --> 20:33.442 What does that mean? 20:33.482 --> 20:35.763 You can't stop using prostitutes. 20:38.385 --> 20:40.987 Funny how the world turns. 20:41.007 --> 20:41.627 Here are the police. 20:43.402 --> 20:52.010 So, listeners, here we are at Camden in the midst of the Camden crawl, but as we might have already mentioned, I've really misjudged my sartorial choices for today. 20:52.310 --> 20:55.473 I'd look like a kind of a banker who's having a day off. 20:56.433 --> 21:00.237 I look quintessentially touristy because I've arrived on my bike, so I've got my shorts on. 21:00.477 --> 21:01.558 First day of shorts weather. 21:01.818 --> 21:08.823 Yeah, we both feel sort of conspicuously misdressed, so we're going to try and fix it by buying some uniform, right? 21:08.863 --> 21:09.603 Some trendy uniform. 21:09.624 --> 21:10.004 Exactly. 21:10.044 --> 21:14.567 We've come to the epicentre of Trendiosity in Camden, which is the shop Ganges. 21:14.987 --> 21:18.029 It's halfway between Ganges and Ganges. 21:18.570 --> 21:20.511 It's maybe the place that... Perfect place to be. 21:20.731 --> 21:21.232 Exactly. 21:21.992 --> 21:29.517 The thing about this shop is it's for girls, but that kind of gender bias doesn't really wash at Camden. 21:29.537 --> 21:32.279 You know, girls can dress like boys, boys can dress like girls. 21:32.880 --> 21:33.640 Who gives a toss? 21:33.840 --> 21:39.304 So we're going to focus on sunglasses because I've got some Ray-Bans on and they look very 80s, don't they? 21:39.344 --> 21:40.085 Very Tom Cruise. 21:40.305 --> 21:41.747 That should be trendy, shouldn't it? 21:41.767 --> 21:45.973 To me, you look really nice, but... What they need is coloured rims, right? 21:46.073 --> 21:46.454 Right. 21:46.614 --> 21:47.355 That's the fashion. 21:47.415 --> 21:49.899 Candy colours on your sunglasses rims. 21:50.420 --> 21:54.686 The other thing to do is have slats, as if you've got Venetian blinds over your eyes. 21:54.786 --> 21:56.629 Like, Kanye West modelled these very... Yeah. 21:57.069 --> 22:06.174 Once you've got your sunglasses and there's a magnificent range of different colours and frames and shades, you've got to have your scarf, haven't you? 22:06.194 --> 22:07.135 They're very trendy. 22:07.255 --> 22:08.256 What do you do with the scarf? 22:08.276 --> 22:09.616 Do you wear them around your neck? 22:09.636 --> 22:10.797 Well, have a look around you, Adam. 22:10.837 --> 22:14.619 Here in Camden you'll see a lot of people sporting scarfs. 22:14.739 --> 22:18.221 These people have them on their heads as if they're sort of Arab gentlemen. 22:18.422 --> 22:19.782 A couple of individuals there. 22:19.802 --> 22:23.785 But a lot of kids like just to toss the scarf around the neck in a devil-may-care fashion. 22:24.545 --> 22:26.246 It's got no practical purpose. 22:26.346 --> 22:26.846 What about this? 22:26.926 --> 22:30.367 Could you pop a scarf, say, with some skulls, a skull motif? 22:30.427 --> 22:33.348 Could you pop it in your flies and just have it hanging out of your flies? 22:33.368 --> 22:34.208 Sorry to interrupt you. 22:34.248 --> 22:35.709 This gentleman's looking for sunglasses. 22:35.869 --> 22:36.249 Hello, sir. 22:36.289 --> 22:37.369 Do you mind if we say hello to you? 22:37.869 --> 22:38.730 Yeah, no worries. 22:39.170 --> 22:40.890 You're looking for a pair of sunglasses here. 22:41.130 --> 22:42.111 I can't help but notice. 22:42.551 --> 22:47.953 If you want these, this is one single lens framed with sort of metallic plastic. 22:47.993 --> 22:49.633 You could look like a robot man first. 22:49.793 --> 22:50.333 Cyclops. 22:50.553 --> 22:51.534 Daft Punk, yes. 22:51.574 --> 22:52.394 Cyclops finger. 22:52.574 --> 22:55.535 How would that change your life if people must took you for a cyclops? 22:58.256 --> 23:00.216 How's he supposed to respond to that? 23:00.856 --> 23:02.257 What kind of question is that? 23:02.337 --> 23:05.498 I think um was a good enough answer. 23:05.598 --> 23:06.578 You're almost talking to me. 23:06.598 --> 23:07.878 I'd be interested to find out. 23:08.039 --> 23:09.399 I might just buy a pair now. 23:09.679 --> 23:10.680 Hey, listen, what's your name, sir? 23:10.940 --> 23:11.160 Paul. 23:11.480 --> 23:12.220 Paul, nice to meet you. 23:12.240 --> 23:13.181 I'm Adam, this is Joe. 23:13.201 --> 23:13.801 Hello. 23:13.861 --> 23:14.622 How are you doing? 23:15.182 --> 23:15.882 I love you, sir. 23:15.902 --> 23:16.363 Thank you. 23:16.723 --> 23:22.546 Hey, listen, Paul, as a present, right, I'm proposing to buy you any pair of sunglasses that you like. 23:24.167 --> 23:24.327 Right? 23:24.367 --> 23:25.448 But you have to pick one. 23:26.310 --> 23:27.071 Okay. 23:27.591 --> 23:27.811 Right. 23:29.012 --> 23:32.814 It's going to be... It's got to be something totally ridiculous, isn't it? 23:32.854 --> 23:33.095 Yeah. 23:33.515 --> 23:35.296 But you've got to walk away from us wearing them. 23:35.636 --> 23:36.397 All right? 23:36.537 --> 23:37.157 That's the deal. 23:37.577 --> 23:45.923 And then you've got to contact the show and tell us what kind of lady response you've had, how your life's changed, whether you've got promoted, or will you do that? 23:46.343 --> 23:48.025 Yeah, all right, I'll tell you what I'm going to do. 23:48.085 --> 23:51.467 I'm going to go for the Camp Blue Cyclops glasses. 23:51.487 --> 23:52.769 He's going to the dark funk. 23:52.969 --> 23:56.572 It's a single lens going right across the eyes, curling round the head. 23:56.612 --> 23:57.733 Oh, it does have a little line on it. 23:57.793 --> 23:59.514 Oh, see, you don't see that from the outside. 23:59.614 --> 24:00.855 How much are they? 24:00.875 --> 24:02.777 That's the question I'm concerned with. 24:02.957 --> 24:04.538 That's a previous little trick, that. 24:05.559 --> 24:05.920 Ado, look. 24:06.140 --> 24:06.961 You look insane. 24:06.981 --> 24:07.701 Sensational. 24:07.821 --> 24:08.982 That is sensational. 24:09.003 --> 24:11.765 All right, I'm going to buy you those glasses. 24:11.825 --> 24:12.746 Paul, nice to meet you. 24:13.206 --> 24:13.907 You too, Seth. 24:14.107 --> 24:14.388 Take care. 24:14.408 --> 24:14.988 Nice to meet you, Paul. 24:15.008 --> 24:15.869 Thanks for talking to us. 24:16.690 --> 24:17.531 There goes Paul. 24:17.671 --> 24:20.794 He's walking away from us wearing his robot shades. 24:21.114 --> 24:21.715 Bye-bye, Paul. 24:21.755 --> 24:22.655 He's blowing us a kiss. 24:22.976 --> 24:28.661 He looks like a very, very, very stupid man now that he's got those glasses on. 24:30.943 --> 24:51.863 Oh crikey there we go that was madness playing last night on the top of a bus here in Camden and this is Adam and Jo on BBC six music coming to you live from the Camden crawl and we actually introduced madness yesterday as well yeah and the thing is that six music a while a week ago or so said are you up for introducing madness and we said yeah sure up for anything but then when the time came you always get 24:52.043 --> 24:55.746 One always gets a little bit nervous and then the crowd builds up and then madness. 24:55.826 --> 24:57.968 Sugs didn't turn up for quite a while. 24:58.508 --> 25:02.311 And so the crowd was waiting for about 45 minutes in a little pen and getting a bit boisterous. 25:02.331 --> 25:03.192 Tiny bit belligerent. 25:03.452 --> 25:07.035 And Joe and I had agreed vaguely what to say. 25:07.415 --> 25:09.777 But when we got up there, Joe, you abandoned the plan. 25:10.438 --> 25:10.718 I did. 25:10.738 --> 25:12.019 I'd like to apologize for that. 25:12.559 --> 25:16.823 When I get in front of a crowd of people, I suddenly have a kind of a power surge. 25:17.003 --> 25:17.283 Right. 25:19.105 --> 25:20.386 Is it like a Hitler power surge? 25:20.406 --> 25:24.351 Yeah, I want to talk about politics and foment some sort of revolt. 25:24.531 --> 25:26.994 I find it hard to repress those instincts. 25:27.034 --> 25:29.136 Yeah, I do apologize for that. 25:29.156 --> 25:31.179 I was thinking last night I should apologize to you for that. 25:31.920 --> 25:32.681 So now I've done it. 25:32.701 --> 25:33.922 Or through the plan. 25:33.942 --> 25:36.805 Then we get up there and I go, hi, I'm Adam. 25:37.446 --> 25:39.526 to which your response should be, and I'm Joe. 25:39.586 --> 25:41.707 Joe just goes off on one. 25:41.727 --> 25:42.707 It was good, though, wasn't it? 25:42.807 --> 25:43.687 It was good, yeah. 25:43.747 --> 25:48.028 And then you got rattled because you thought the crowd were getting bumptious because I mentioned that we were South London boys. 25:48.048 --> 25:50.528 Well, they were chanting off, off, off, off. 25:51.128 --> 25:52.689 No, they weren't chanting off, off. 25:52.729 --> 25:53.529 That's what I heard. 25:53.549 --> 25:55.569 That's the voice in your brain. 25:55.609 --> 26:04.631 They were so, maybe, yeah, that is the voice in my brain, but they seemed very keen to hear madness and they wanted anyone who wasn't madness to get off, off, off, off. 26:05.091 --> 26:05.671 Maybe you. 26:05.691 --> 26:06.351 Maybe me. 26:06.371 --> 26:07.572 But they wanted more bucculis. 26:07.832 --> 26:08.332 Did they? 26:08.372 --> 26:08.572 Yeah. 26:08.852 --> 26:10.853 The other side of the crowd were chanting, More Buxton! 26:10.893 --> 26:11.713 More Buxton! 26:11.973 --> 26:12.313 More! 26:12.393 --> 26:13.854 Half hour set from Buxton! 26:14.374 --> 26:15.154 That's what they wanted. 26:15.174 --> 26:17.215 When all you'd said was, Hello, I'm Adam. 26:17.295 --> 26:17.495 Yeah. 26:17.815 --> 26:21.416 Well, listen, I think we should launch Text the Nation after this next record, don't you? 26:21.756 --> 26:22.036 Yes. 26:22.216 --> 26:22.776 Let's do that. 26:23.337 --> 26:25.757 But now we've got a free play, and this is one of yours, I think, Joe. 26:25.797 --> 26:27.478 Yeah, this is the band Godly and Cream. 26:27.498 --> 26:28.658 Do you remember Godly and Cream? 26:28.678 --> 26:29.258 Yeah, of course. 26:29.358 --> 26:31.579 Lol Cream and Lol Godly. 26:31.759 --> 26:32.439 Kevin Godly. 26:32.459 --> 26:33.120 Kevin Godly. 26:33.200 --> 26:33.980 And Lol Cream. 26:34.020 --> 26:34.160 Yeah. 26:35.000 --> 26:39.723 This is a track that popped into my head like an old friend who I'd forgotten about. 26:39.803 --> 26:40.724 Is this under your thumb? 26:40.764 --> 26:41.064 Yeah. 26:41.264 --> 26:42.805 I used to love this one. 26:42.865 --> 26:44.766 This is a proper story record, right? 26:44.906 --> 26:47.668 I had a great noir-esque video with a lady on a train. 26:47.688 --> 26:47.948 It did. 26:48.008 --> 27:00.196 It tells a confusing and not very good story all the way through full of details and a little setup and payoff and characters and everything, but the instrumentation is really haunting and the tune's really good. 27:00.396 --> 27:03.039 It bubbles away, doesn't it, in a very pleasing electronic style. 27:03.059 --> 27:04.940 Yeah, this is Godly and Cream with Under Your Thumb. 27:06.542 --> 27:07.863 Oh, come on, Godly and Cream. 27:08.023 --> 27:08.544 Oh, here it comes. 27:08.564 --> 27:10.986 This is Godly and Cream with Under Your Thumb. 27:11.006 --> 27:15.290 This is Adam and Joan, BBC 6 Music, coming to you live from the Camden Crawl. 27:15.470 --> 27:19.534 It's a great pleasure to be here, and we're joined by 20 members of Black Squadron. 27:19.694 --> 27:20.815 How you doing, Black Squadron? 27:22.671 --> 27:23.211 Look at that. 27:23.272 --> 27:23.892 They're quite ill. 27:25.373 --> 27:26.334 They're on the verge of death. 27:26.394 --> 27:28.896 They've eaten something bad and they're getting very tired and depressed. 27:29.676 --> 27:33.399 We're going to be talking to our Black Squadron members a bit later on about the whole Steven phenomenon. 27:33.619 --> 27:36.821 Yeah, we're going to make a decision today, an official decision, whether to kill it 27:37.862 --> 27:39.623 change it or keep it going. 27:40.344 --> 27:44.166 And as the elite Black Squadron force, you guys are going to be instrumental in that decision. 27:44.366 --> 27:50.070 It is, as Joe pointed out earlier, very much like the G8 summit, but just a Stevenage summit. 27:50.230 --> 27:54.093 You will get beaten up after you leave by the police, so be ready for that. 27:54.893 --> 27:56.975 That's just a little satire there, of course. 27:57.015 --> 27:57.955 Political satire. 27:58.396 --> 27:59.556 That's not actually the case. 28:00.597 --> 28:02.418 Now, we're going to launch Text to Nation, I think. 28:02.458 --> 28:04.720 So, shall we have the jingle for the nation's favourite feature? 28:07.113 --> 28:07.934 Text the nation! 28:07.974 --> 28:09.915 Text, text, text, text the nation! 28:09.955 --> 28:10.916 What if I don't want to? 28:11.156 --> 28:11.837 Text the nation! 28:11.857 --> 28:12.697 It doesn't matter, text! 28:15.159 --> 28:22.124 Now, earlier in the week, Joe, I was constructing a picnic table, right? 28:22.485 --> 28:22.705 Right. 28:22.745 --> 28:26.428 You know those benches, picnic benches you get in public parks and stuff, right? 28:26.828 --> 28:28.829 And you can sit opposite each other. 28:28.850 --> 28:30.130 The benches are attached to the table. 28:30.371 --> 28:30.791 Exactly. 28:30.931 --> 28:32.493 Yeah, they're a sort of single wooden thing. 28:32.733 --> 28:35.656 For as long as I can remember, it's been my dream to own one of those. 28:36.197 --> 28:36.457 Wow. 28:36.738 --> 28:38.680 And that dream came true this week. 28:39.160 --> 28:44.386 You know, when I went out and purchased one, very reasonably priced, you know, it makes sense in these difficult times. 28:45.648 --> 28:47.710 Just to have a picnic bench in your house. 28:48.090 --> 28:50.093 So that's what I did, I went out and got one. 28:50.473 --> 28:51.593 I was putting it together, right? 28:52.133 --> 29:00.015 And I don't know if I was following the instructions poorly or what, but I was finding it very difficult to make the large wooden bits fit together properly. 29:00.035 --> 29:09.278 And at one point, I was manhandling this very heavy cross beam thing and it swung across onto my thumb and it sort of sliced 29:10.018 --> 29:38.272 horizontally across the top of my thumb and it basically here look you see that it basically lifted the skin just over my nail closer right off the foot like a there's a meter there's a sort of horrible postulant bloody thing there on the bottom of Adam's thumb yeah and it was absolutely agonizing right so I stood up and I did some effing and blinding and and then I nearly passed out and 29:38.912 --> 29:39.212 Really? 29:39.392 --> 29:39.612 Yeah. 29:39.652 --> 29:40.873 With shock at your own language? 29:40.893 --> 29:41.493 I don't know. 29:41.573 --> 29:45.475 Yeah, maybe with shock and disgust at my own lax morals and swearing. 29:45.955 --> 29:47.816 But no, I was literally pausing. 29:47.836 --> 29:53.258 I had to go inside, get a glass of water and sit down because I was just about to faint because I whacked my thumb so hard. 29:53.878 --> 29:55.819 And then I got up and I thought, I'm okay. 29:55.959 --> 29:57.120 I nearly fainted again. 29:57.680 --> 30:01.283 And I'd just been watching, do you remember I was talking about watching the Ridley Scott film, Body of Lies? 30:01.363 --> 30:01.543 Yeah. 30:01.923 --> 30:05.987 Which I actually enjoyed, and it's all about torture and stuff in the Middle East. 30:06.247 --> 30:14.913 It was quite grim, and there's one particularly grim scene with Leonardo DiCaprio being tortured, right, in a cave in there, whacking his fingers with a hammer. 30:15.334 --> 30:17.636 It's really a hard scene to watch. 30:18.136 --> 30:20.418 And I remember when I was watching I was thinking, I could take that. 30:20.998 --> 30:21.819 I could probably take that. 30:22.359 --> 30:39.777 you were wrong and i was absolutely wrong i can't even take a little tap from a garden table so this is all leading up to our theme for text the nation this week right yeah which is um minor injuries yeah we we've done this before in the past right years and years ago but we'd like to do it again because 30:40.037 --> 30:40.697 it's really good. 30:41.317 --> 30:48.059 We had a lot of fun with it last time, but it's the most painful things you can do to yourself accidentally that aren't serious. 30:48.239 --> 30:48.599 Exactly. 30:48.639 --> 30:50.940 So you're not hospitalised, there's no permanent damage. 30:51.680 --> 30:55.841 And we're not talking about, because some kids do this sort of thing for fun these days, right? 30:55.861 --> 30:56.922 What sort of thing are you talking about? 30:56.942 --> 30:58.262 Well, Johnny Knoxville type stuff. 30:58.422 --> 30:58.822 Oh, I see. 30:58.842 --> 31:00.224 They staple things to their foreheads. 31:00.244 --> 31:00.804 No, no, no. 31:00.924 --> 31:02.646 Instead of going to the theatre these days. 31:02.746 --> 31:03.547 Yeah, that's true, isn't it? 31:03.567 --> 31:04.528 Yeah, that is what they do. 31:04.668 --> 31:05.869 They run around in nettles. 31:05.889 --> 31:07.691 We're not talking about voluntary things. 31:07.931 --> 31:08.091 No. 31:08.792 --> 31:10.393 We're talking about things that you do accidentally. 31:10.573 --> 31:12.095 Yeah, paper cuts, that kind of thing. 31:12.315 --> 31:14.217 Stubbed toes, the little toe being stubbed. 31:14.417 --> 31:16.639 Man, I stubbed my toe viciously earlier in the week. 31:16.899 --> 31:17.400 It was terrible. 31:17.420 --> 31:19.461 I've had a very injurious week, really. 31:19.562 --> 31:21.984 I mean, my thumb is still giving me a lot of jit. 31:22.544 --> 31:25.945 And I've got a little paper cut down here, which is very painful. 31:26.005 --> 31:28.286 So we'd like to hear your text on that subject. 31:28.306 --> 31:34.208 The text number is 64046, or you can email adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk. 31:34.648 --> 31:35.948 We want you to make us smart. 31:36.248 --> 31:36.448 Yeah. 31:36.808 --> 31:37.049 Right? 31:37.469 --> 31:41.530 We want stories of really, really painful accidents, but things that aren't serious. 31:41.550 --> 31:44.871 We want to hear the whole of Black Squadron here at the Camden Crawl going, ow! 31:45.992 --> 31:48.554 Can we just practice that quickly Black Squadron? 31:48.774 --> 31:56.421 So just pretend that you've heard, I'll show you my thumb again and when I show it to you, make a noise that expresses your sympathy. 31:58.956 --> 31:59.316 There you go. 31:59.536 --> 32:00.177 That's very good. 32:00.497 --> 32:01.257 Panto style. 32:02.578 --> 32:04.840 Well, this is kind of a pantomime that we're involved in. 32:04.860 --> 32:05.820 Yeah, early morning panto. 32:05.940 --> 32:06.381 Exactly. 32:06.941 --> 32:08.182 Now, let's have some more music. 32:09.382 --> 32:10.443 We've missed the top of hour. 32:10.463 --> 32:12.484 We just sailed right past the top of hour. 32:12.524 --> 32:14.105 So we're not even going to have the jingle, I don't think. 32:14.185 --> 32:14.585 Right, Ben? 32:15.106 --> 32:15.466 Have it later. 32:15.606 --> 32:16.186 Have it later. 32:16.206 --> 32:17.807 We'll have a top of hour at 11 o'clock. 32:17.847 --> 32:20.369 But here's the white stripes right now with Seven Nation Army. 32:21.041 --> 32:21.522 Very good. 32:21.582 --> 32:22.423 Congratulations. 32:22.543 --> 32:25.366 That was the White Stripes with Seven Nathanami. 32:25.726 --> 32:26.927 This is Sadam and Joe here. 32:26.967 --> 32:28.569 I didn't even bother to put myself right now. 32:28.609 --> 32:29.210 Just ploughed on. 32:29.230 --> 32:29.610 That's okay. 32:29.730 --> 32:30.531 It's the Camden crawl. 32:30.551 --> 32:31.792 That kind of behaviour's allowed. 32:31.952 --> 32:32.173 Yeah. 32:32.233 --> 32:36.337 We're supposed to be hungover, just crawled out of some kind of, uh, drain. 32:36.557 --> 32:37.378 Mm-hmm. 32:37.438 --> 32:38.259 Dressed fashionably. 32:38.479 --> 32:40.281 That's how people live their life here in Camden. 32:40.621 --> 32:41.362 Like Jules Holland. 32:41.663 --> 32:42.744 Exactly like Jules. 32:42.924 --> 32:43.184 Yeah. 32:44.845 --> 32:45.546 He's not like that. 32:45.726 --> 32:46.706 He's not like that at all. 32:46.726 --> 32:47.267 Just joking. 32:47.507 --> 32:48.547 So we were talking earlier. 32:48.867 --> 32:49.708 Were you about to say something? 32:49.848 --> 32:49.968 Nope. 32:50.268 --> 32:53.110 No, we were talking about earlier about... How can I put this? 32:54.290 --> 32:59.873 Pop songs that you customise so that you can sing them when you're doing something quite boring and they fit. 33:00.193 --> 33:02.834 Crossing the road, crossing the road. 33:02.894 --> 33:04.315 Crossing the road, crossing the road. 33:04.475 --> 33:05.175 Is that a pop song? 33:05.236 --> 33:05.776 Yeah, it is. 33:05.996 --> 33:06.456 What is it? 33:06.576 --> 33:07.957 Breaking the law, breaking the law. 33:08.237 --> 33:08.537 Thank you. 33:08.998 --> 33:10.279 So we've had one or two texts. 33:10.359 --> 33:12.341 Here's one from Ollie and Bex in Haringey. 33:12.361 --> 33:13.062 Yes, yeah, yeah. 33:24.753 --> 33:25.954 I'm just not that familiar with that track. 33:26.254 --> 33:29.915 You know, I always remember Steve Mason from the Beater Band saying that was his favourite Madonna track. 33:30.175 --> 33:30.436 Really? 33:30.456 --> 33:31.696 It's a little Steve Mason fact. 33:31.936 --> 33:32.657 That's a good fact. 33:32.677 --> 33:36.278 Here's one from Paul Sissons, who's probably Peter Sissons' brother. 33:36.298 --> 33:36.858 Almost certainly. 33:36.918 --> 33:37.719 Almost certainly. 33:38.519 --> 33:39.059 Or his dad. 33:39.499 --> 33:40.440 Or his dad, who knows. 33:40.740 --> 33:44.522 Hi Adam and Joe, I sing to myself when visiting a famous Chicken Takeaway establishment. 33:44.542 --> 33:45.222 Yeah, this is his dad. 33:45.262 --> 33:49.084 Take these chicken wings and learn to fry again. 33:50.365 --> 33:52.187 That's Broken Wings by Mr. Mister. 33:52.387 --> 33:52.608 Yeah. 33:52.948 --> 33:55.731 Nick from Ealing says Adam and Joe, what is going on down there? 33:55.832 --> 33:56.553 They're just, it's a bar. 33:56.573 --> 33:57.574 A lot of noise in here. 33:57.614 --> 33:58.635 What do you expect, Joe? 33:58.655 --> 34:01.258 It's very miffed because everybody needs not standing there. 34:01.278 --> 34:02.400 I need to go and tick some people off. 34:02.820 --> 34:05.864 They should be just standing exactly as if they're meeting the Queen. 34:05.924 --> 34:06.405 Not moving. 34:06.445 --> 34:07.867 For three hours, not moving or speaking. 34:09.168 --> 34:20.079 Nick from Ealing says, Adam and Jo, we think it's fun to sing I Feel Like London Tonight, London Tonight, London Tonight to the tune of I Feel Like Chicken Tonight when the local current affairs programme comes on. 34:20.599 --> 34:21.620 That is desperate. 34:21.760 --> 34:22.181 Do you think? 34:22.421 --> 34:22.941 Yes. 34:23.482 --> 34:24.903 You're calling your listeners desperate. 34:24.923 --> 34:25.804 Nick from Ealing. 34:25.924 --> 34:27.466 In a very appealing way, obviously. 34:27.486 --> 34:28.687 That's true, a loving way. 34:29.147 --> 34:32.250 So the show London Tonight comes on and they get so excited they start singing. 34:32.290 --> 34:33.772 They start singing that. 34:34.372 --> 34:35.793 Oh, I imagine it's a little bit ironic. 34:35.833 --> 34:36.354 Woo-hoo! 34:36.474 --> 34:37.755 London Tonight time! 34:38.015 --> 34:39.477 I feel like London Tonight! 34:39.737 --> 34:40.357 London Tonight! 34:40.377 --> 34:41.338 It's a good programme. 34:41.358 --> 34:43.921 It's got all the latest news from around London. 34:44.181 --> 34:47.023 It's got a quite attractive woman and a really creepy old man. 34:48.264 --> 34:49.285 What's the name of that guy here? 34:49.305 --> 34:52.008 I don't know, but listeners who don't live in London, that won't mean much to you. 34:52.128 --> 34:56.351 But I'm sure you have similar local news programmes with creepy old men and attractive women. 34:56.772 --> 34:59.935 That's the win-win news combination, isn't it? 35:00.055 --> 35:01.236 In Norfolk, they're all creepy. 35:01.596 --> 35:05.377 Yeah, okay, so keep sending those ideas in. 35:06.758 --> 35:07.418 Yeah, thanks a lot. 35:07.438 --> 35:08.679 Let's play some more music now. 35:08.919 --> 35:09.759 What is going on? 35:09.819 --> 35:12.400 I think Amy Winehouse has arrived in the pub. 35:12.980 --> 35:14.761 She's just walking into walls and tripping over boxes. 35:14.781 --> 35:17.522 Joe, this is what happens when you go into the outside world and do a show from there. 35:18.542 --> 35:19.584 Yeah, you don't like it, do you? 35:19.804 --> 35:20.565 You're frightened of it. 35:21.326 --> 35:22.227 You like Phoenix, right? 35:22.467 --> 35:23.028 Yes, I do. 35:23.208 --> 35:24.730 Here is a track from Them. 35:24.770 --> 35:33.401 This is a new one, brand spanking new from the new Phoenix album, which is called Wolfgang Amadeus, and this track is called Listomania. 35:34.161 --> 35:41.225 That's Phoenix from their forthcoming album Wolfgang Amadeus, and that is called Listomania, which is also a Ken Russell film, right? 35:41.905 --> 35:43.386 About the composer Franz List. 35:43.766 --> 35:44.287 Is it a good film? 35:44.847 --> 35:45.808 I haven't seen it for years. 35:45.848 --> 35:47.569 It's one of his crazy, crazy ones. 35:47.949 --> 35:48.209 Right. 35:48.929 --> 35:52.591 So I can't... Which are the non-crazy Ken Russell films? 35:52.631 --> 35:53.212 There aren't any. 35:53.792 --> 35:55.093 Yeah, they're all pretty crazy. 35:55.473 --> 36:11.663 Now I was, this is on a non-related topic, but every week after I do this show, I cycle to the station to get on the training and go back home, and I pop into like a little calf to get, what are you smiling at like that for? 36:11.683 --> 36:12.764 Nothing, just, I'm happy. 36:13.044 --> 36:13.845 I'm just smiling. 36:13.965 --> 36:15.866 You're smiling in a kind of smug way. 36:15.886 --> 36:17.307 Well, that's just me, isn't it? 36:17.407 --> 36:19.108 Like you're just arming your torpedoes. 36:19.729 --> 36:19.929 Yeah. 36:21.450 --> 36:41.864 tracking targeting so what I do is I go into this shop and it's like you know one of the chain shops what do you want to call them one of the shops that sells chains exactly it's a chain shop and so I go in there and I get the same thing every week you know I get myself a little sandwich and fruit pot thing and and the guy has come to recognize me the guy behind the counter 36:43.145 --> 36:48.568 Like, not recognize me as Adam Buxton who does this show, he's got no idea who I am, but he recognizes my face. 36:49.548 --> 36:56.792 And so after a few weeks I noticed that he started to sort of, like he would look up and realize that he was about to serve me next. 36:57.293 --> 36:58.834 And his face would light up. 36:59.494 --> 37:02.677 with happiness to see me like an old friend, you know what I mean? 37:03.137 --> 37:03.317 Right. 37:03.337 --> 37:07.701 Because he recognised me so it was just, it was like, hey, hey, it's you kind of thing, you know what I mean? 37:08.101 --> 37:08.562 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 37:09.122 --> 37:18.250 And so after a while, apart from just telling me how much my food came to money-wise, he would start chatting to me and saying, how are you? 37:19.111 --> 37:21.153 And, oh, you come on your bike, have you? 37:21.633 --> 37:25.058 Because he'd see my helmet and stuff, and I'd say, yeah, yeah, yeah. 37:25.398 --> 37:27.361 He goes, it's the best way to get around town, you know? 37:27.381 --> 37:28.703 I was like, yeah, it is, yeah. 37:29.123 --> 37:31.066 He said, we ride a lot of bikes where I come from. 37:31.086 --> 37:32.188 I was like, all right, where's that? 37:32.228 --> 37:33.650 He's like, India, I come from India. 37:34.090 --> 37:35.292 OK, thanks very much. 37:35.412 --> 37:36.654 There's the money, and you know. 37:37.635 --> 37:40.556 So I always keep it fairly brief, because I don't want to get into too much of a chat. 37:40.616 --> 37:42.516 But now I'm worried that I'm upsetting him. 37:42.736 --> 37:44.356 Because last week I went in, right? 37:45.116 --> 37:48.017 And he gave me a big beaming smile, but I was quite busy. 37:48.037 --> 37:48.937 I was late for my train. 37:49.277 --> 37:51.577 So I didn't really give him a proper smile back. 37:51.878 --> 37:53.278 Also, I didn't want to lead him on. 37:54.038 --> 37:56.398 Because you don't want to get locked into a conversation about India. 37:56.858 --> 37:58.899 Well, no, I just don't want a relationship. 37:58.919 --> 38:00.619 I don't feel ready for a relationship with him. 38:00.899 --> 38:01.199 Really? 38:01.379 --> 38:01.619 Yeah. 38:01.739 --> 38:02.499 He's not your type. 38:02.859 --> 38:03.640 No, he's not my type. 38:03.660 --> 38:04.680 And I don't know where it could lead. 38:04.720 --> 38:05.740 Why don't you tell him that? 38:06.604 --> 38:09.266 I mean, it's best to be honest about this kind of thing in relationships. 38:09.306 --> 38:12.448 You should say, look, I appreciate your chatting to me, but you're not my type. 38:13.128 --> 38:15.130 I don't think your stories are going to interest me. 38:15.470 --> 38:16.551 No, but seriously, though. 38:16.731 --> 38:18.952 So let's just get on with the business of trading. 38:19.212 --> 38:19.473 Yeah. 38:19.993 --> 38:20.753 And leave it at that. 38:20.833 --> 38:22.274 I think that would offend and upset him. 38:22.334 --> 38:25.897 Maybe he's just trying to be pleasant and trying to have a sunny disposition, right? 38:26.377 --> 38:30.420 And I feel worried that I'm just throwing it back in his face by not responding. 38:30.480 --> 38:31.500 But then I'm worried. 38:31.540 --> 38:32.021 What if he... 38:32.481 --> 38:34.502 He does want it to go somewhere special. 38:34.542 --> 38:35.342 I tell you what you should do. 38:35.862 --> 38:41.204 Next time you go to the shop, pause outside the window where he can see you and have a sort of a fit. 38:42.925 --> 38:46.626 Have a sort of a... Sort of a shouting fit. 38:47.207 --> 38:48.687 Like you're trying to get ants off you? 38:48.927 --> 38:49.227 Right. 38:49.247 --> 38:51.368 Get off... Ants get off me! 38:51.608 --> 38:52.569 Sounds like Jules again. 38:52.589 --> 38:53.489 He's got this in my eye! 38:53.929 --> 38:54.349 That kind of thing. 38:54.369 --> 38:55.030 Exactly, yes. 38:55.370 --> 38:58.271 And then... Start laughing like that. 38:59.941 --> 39:06.412 yeah but then when you enter the shop just drop that completely and behave completely normally right and then he won't want to talk to you 39:08.335 --> 39:09.215 That's the solution. 39:09.795 --> 39:11.196 What if he finds that kind of behavior? 39:11.236 --> 39:12.376 See, I didn't torpedo that one. 39:12.416 --> 39:13.076 Extra attractive. 39:13.116 --> 39:13.516 No, you didn't. 39:13.536 --> 39:14.357 You were very supportive. 39:14.377 --> 39:15.797 I delivered a solution torpedo. 39:15.817 --> 39:16.437 Thank you very much. 39:16.457 --> 39:18.017 A solution-tipped torpedo. 39:18.638 --> 39:19.158 Wind it up. 39:19.178 --> 39:19.998 We're being told to wind it up. 39:20.118 --> 39:21.858 I'll tell you how it goes next week with him. 39:22.519 --> 39:23.639 Now, what are we going to play next? 39:23.679 --> 39:24.719 Oh, yes, this is my free play. 39:24.939 --> 39:26.239 Now, I introduced this earlier. 39:26.880 --> 39:30.320 This was the track that went down very well on the CD compilation I made in the car. 39:30.801 --> 39:32.281 Neil Diamond with Mr. Bojangle. 39:46.004 --> 39:47.484 Lock the Task Bar. 39:47.504 --> 39:50.905 There we go, that's the clash with Lock the Task Bar. 39:51.245 --> 39:53.306 This is, uh, that's not actually called that. 39:53.326 --> 40:04.209 This is Adam and Joe on BBC Six Music coming to you live from the Camden Crawl, so if you can hear some, uh, unusual hubbub going on, it's because we're broadcasting from a bar. 40:04.509 --> 40:05.289 A hubbar? 40:05.789 --> 40:05.989 What? 40:06.089 --> 40:07.349 No, a hubbub, hubub. 40:08.050 --> 40:09.110 And yes, it's a bar. 40:09.170 --> 40:09.750 Sorry, I've gone off 40:11.911 --> 40:12.911 And this is Camden, right? 40:12.931 --> 40:15.612 So people are drinking already. 40:15.632 --> 40:16.452 Are they? 40:16.552 --> 40:22.174 It's 10.38 or so in the morning and there's already heavy drinking going on which should not be encouraged. 40:22.494 --> 40:23.175 Who's drinking? 40:23.615 --> 40:27.396 I'm just guessing actually I can't see but I'm assuming because it's Camden that's what people are doing. 40:27.436 --> 40:29.157 People are still having orange juice and stuff. 40:29.177 --> 40:29.577 Do you think? 40:30.297 --> 40:31.137 The sun's come out. 40:31.157 --> 40:32.498 Well, at least the sun did come out. 40:32.618 --> 40:33.498 At least it stopped raining. 40:33.518 --> 40:35.378 I got soaked on my way in this morning. 40:36.019 --> 40:37.259 Absolutely soaked! 40:37.279 --> 40:38.119 It's not my fault! 40:38.239 --> 40:40.240 Well, I should have been warned. 40:41.080 --> 40:42.580 Listen, let's do some text-on-ations. 40:42.620 --> 40:42.800 Yes. 40:42.980 --> 40:43.600 Let's have a jingle. 40:44.221 --> 40:46.641 Text-on-ation. 40:46.701 --> 40:47.721 Text, text, text. 40:47.881 --> 40:48.562 Text-on-ation. 40:48.682 --> 40:49.702 What if I don't want to? 40:49.722 --> 40:50.542 So much hubbub. 40:50.562 --> 40:50.902 Text-on-ation. 40:50.922 --> 40:53.583 It doesn't matter. 40:53.983 --> 40:54.163 Text! 40:54.283 --> 40:56.564 It's only just audible through the hubbub, the text-on-ation thing. 40:56.584 --> 40:56.804 Exactly. 40:56.864 --> 40:57.644 So much hubbub. 40:58.504 --> 41:02.005 I get this syndrome that I've been informed is called cocktail party syndrome. 41:02.225 --> 41:02.445 Right. 41:02.765 --> 41:07.506 And if there is another conversation going on in the background, my brain just tries to tune into it. 41:07.546 --> 41:07.926 Yeah. 41:08.206 --> 41:13.307 It's like if you're at a party and you're talking to someone, but you can't help trying to tune into the conversation happening next to you. 41:13.327 --> 41:16.328 Well, the worst one is when people start talking across the table. 41:16.348 --> 41:17.388 Do you know what I mean? 41:17.408 --> 41:21.429 And you're trying to conduct a conversation and you have, and you're talking to the whole table. 41:21.629 --> 41:21.749 Yeah. 41:21.769 --> 41:25.110 And then someone from across the table starts a rival conversation to someone else. 41:25.170 --> 41:25.750 And you're like, 41:26.010 --> 41:26.570 Excuse me! 41:26.850 --> 41:29.212 Because you can't focus on the two conversations at once. 41:29.612 --> 41:30.472 It's impossible! 41:30.832 --> 41:33.954 We're also joined here by 20 members of the Elite Black Squadron. 41:33.974 --> 41:36.115 Can you still hear us clearly, Elite Squadron? 41:36.135 --> 41:37.715 How are you doing? 41:37.735 --> 41:41.697 They're doing hand-wavy gestures because they can't actually hear us properly. 41:41.997 --> 41:45.219 Whose idea was it to have this show come from an active bar? 41:46.399 --> 41:48.020 James Sterling, our producer. 41:48.040 --> 41:48.881 It's a very good idea. 41:48.901 --> 41:50.121 It provides colour in Atmos. 41:50.141 --> 41:51.442 How are you doing, Black Squadron? 41:51.482 --> 41:51.782 Steven! 41:53.729 --> 41:54.669 There you go, they're still alive. 41:54.689 --> 41:55.390 There we go. 41:55.750 --> 42:09.915 So listen, Text the Nation this week, listeners, is all about non-serious injuries you've suffered that have caused you antagonising pain but can be talked about with levity because they haven't resulted in any permanent injury or hospitalisation. 42:10.835 --> 42:11.856 Are you ready for some of these then? 42:12.716 --> 42:14.036 Here's one from Elaine in Sheffield. 42:14.096 --> 42:17.698 She says, last June I accidentally dropped a glass dish on my big toe. 42:18.258 --> 42:24.020 As I was standing on a tiled floor, it was basically crushed between the dish and the tile below. 42:24.440 --> 42:29.402 Easily the most painful thing that's ever happened to me, I had to get the nail drilled to let the trapped 42:29.642 --> 42:30.182 Blood out. 42:30.282 --> 42:32.124 Shut your mouth. 42:32.524 --> 42:33.865 That's unbelievable. 42:33.885 --> 42:36.786 I mean, they should have done that in Body of Lies. 42:36.806 --> 42:39.228 That's the kind of thing that they could... That would make a good sequence in a film. 42:39.248 --> 42:39.548 Yeah. 42:39.848 --> 42:43.230 People love that kind of sort of instant improvised surgery in films. 42:43.271 --> 42:43.631 Leonardo. 42:43.651 --> 42:44.191 People love it. 42:44.331 --> 42:44.551 Right. 42:44.972 --> 42:47.913 Leonardo DiCaprio in a cave, under heavy duress. 42:48.314 --> 42:51.316 They drop a glass plate on his foot. 42:51.416 --> 42:53.017 I mean, that was, that's unbelievable. 42:53.857 --> 42:54.517 That is unbelievable. 42:54.537 --> 42:55.558 He drilled the toe. 42:55.878 --> 42:57.259 I got a blood blister the other day. 42:57.319 --> 42:58.060 I just remembered this. 42:58.120 --> 43:02.003 I slammed my finger, you know, like I caught it in the door. 43:02.023 --> 43:03.624 I didn't slam the whole finger in the door. 43:03.884 --> 43:08.447 I just caught the end of it and I got a massive blood blister and it all went numb. 43:08.467 --> 43:11.429 It was like a little eco dome on the end of my thumb. 43:11.469 --> 43:12.089 It was amazing. 43:12.129 --> 43:20.255 It was like having the millennium dome there and just full of blood and it went totally numb because the pressure was such that the whole thumb went numb more or less. 43:20.775 --> 43:22.297 So I was kind of digging it in a way. 43:22.317 --> 43:26.802 I was playing with it and tapping it and stuff because it was all taught like a drum full of blood. 43:27.342 --> 43:28.083 This is revolting. 43:28.123 --> 43:32.067 But then at a certain point I knew that I would have to drain it, right, to release the pressure. 43:32.207 --> 43:33.269 Release the pressure! 43:33.889 --> 43:39.896 So finally I pricked it with a pin and it literally spurted out like a gush of blood. 43:42.065 --> 43:47.648 And thereafter, it was agonizingly painful. 43:47.868 --> 43:51.029 Once the blister had been evacuated, it was really painful. 43:51.330 --> 43:55.112 And it was, you know, I had to put germaline on there to stop it going septic. 43:55.192 --> 43:56.492 This is what textination's about. 43:56.512 --> 43:57.633 Why are you looking at me in that way? 43:57.653 --> 43:58.473 Because of the hubbub. 43:58.974 --> 44:00.475 I can't believe how loud the hubbub's getting. 44:00.935 --> 44:01.715 Okay, here's another one. 44:02.356 --> 44:04.537 By the time this show ends, we're just going to be shouting. 44:05.137 --> 44:06.898 Don't worry. 44:07.198 --> 44:07.718 Adam and Joe. 44:08.618 --> 44:14.460 I had my fingernail nearly ripped off when I shut it in my campervan door when going to a party. 44:14.980 --> 44:20.442 It went all colours and I had to cut it with a Stanley blade to get the swelling down a few days later. 44:20.962 --> 44:22.582 Cut it with a Stanley blade? 44:23.243 --> 44:24.063 That's insane. 44:24.083 --> 44:25.623 What, like a big rusty Stanley knife? 44:25.663 --> 44:26.744 No, I guess they used a nice... 44:27.984 --> 44:30.206 You know, you heat it in a flame or something beforehand, surely. 44:30.226 --> 44:32.327 I don't know, they don't say anything about heating it in a flame. 44:33.308 --> 44:33.948 That's horrible. 44:33.968 --> 44:35.049 That's quite painful, isn't it? 44:35.069 --> 44:36.310 Nails are the worst though, aren't they? 44:36.330 --> 44:38.952 Like the tips of your fingers, because you've got all your nerve endings in there. 44:39.392 --> 44:41.634 Something as simple as a splinter under there can be agonising. 44:41.794 --> 44:43.495 I mean, that is absolute torture. 44:43.515 --> 44:45.697 What's the other part of your body that you really wouldn't want to hurt? 44:46.077 --> 44:46.297 Nuts. 44:46.978 --> 44:48.138 The nuts and the winkle. 44:48.479 --> 44:55.544 Will in Eastbourne says, let us take a moment to appreciate getting a shard of potato crisp lodged deep under the gums. 44:56.164 --> 44:56.484 What? 44:56.824 --> 44:57.845 A shard of crisps. 44:57.885 --> 44:58.806 Anybody relate to that? 44:59.346 --> 45:00.326 Under the gums, yeah. 45:00.387 --> 45:01.207 Black Squadron nodding. 45:01.487 --> 45:02.188 Black Squadron nodding. 45:02.208 --> 45:03.708 That's been approved by Black Squadron. 45:04.089 --> 45:05.650 Here's another one from Paul in Belfast. 45:05.670 --> 45:08.751 He says, when I was in primary school, I was play fighting with a friend. 45:09.192 --> 45:11.313 What I didn't realise was he was holding a pencil. 45:11.893 --> 45:14.234 He accidentally stabbed the centre of my hand. 45:14.535 --> 45:18.677 The pencil lead snapped off and is still to this day lodged in my hand. 45:18.857 --> 45:19.817 I've got the same thing! 45:19.837 --> 45:21.638 Slowly, let me finish, please. 45:22.158 --> 45:22.878 Please, can I finish? 45:23.719 --> 45:27.500 It's still lodged in my hand, slowly making its way down my hand towards my vital organs. 45:27.780 --> 45:31.841 Now that's like a sort of nerdy intellectual version of being 50 cent, isn't it? 45:32.201 --> 45:35.402 Instead of bullets lodged in the body, pencil tips. 45:36.083 --> 45:40.304 I mean, that would impress the homies on a certain block, on Sesame Street, maybe. 45:40.384 --> 45:46.686 Right, instead of showing off their bullet wounds, they just... And over there I was stabbed by an HB pencil. 45:47.086 --> 45:47.387 Yes. 45:47.447 --> 45:48.808 That kind of thing, is that what you're talking about? 45:48.828 --> 45:50.630 That is exactly what I'm talking about. 45:50.690 --> 45:51.611 We're going to play some music. 45:51.651 --> 45:54.894 We'll come back to text the nation a bit later on, so please keep your messages coming in. 45:55.375 --> 45:59.018 This is the Maccabees, and this is not a live track that we're playing, right? 46:00.060 --> 46:04.884 But after this track, we are going to play you another package, a Camden package. 46:05.325 --> 46:08.929 And in the package, I think you will be finding out how we got on when we went. 46:09.509 --> 46:10.290 clothes shopping. 46:10.350 --> 46:11.271 Joe got a t-shirt. 46:11.291 --> 46:16.915 Yeah, we'd kind of identified the fact that we were poorly dressed so we tried to fix that problem by going to a clothes shop and getting some kit. 46:17.215 --> 46:17.496 I got it. 46:17.516 --> 46:19.978 I mean, I ended up spending about 50 quid yesterday. 46:20.018 --> 46:20.638 Don't give it away. 46:21.839 --> 46:28.164 Because it was, you know, I bought the guy's shades and then I went and bought another item from this shop that we'll be telling you about shortly. 46:28.205 --> 46:29.966 But first, here's the Maccabees with Love You Best. 46:30.776 --> 46:33.878 We're back in the main drag here in Camden Town. 46:33.979 --> 46:34.279 Hello. 46:34.339 --> 46:35.680 Good, thank you. 46:35.960 --> 46:37.661 Joe's just chatting to some of the locals. 46:38.162 --> 46:45.007 We are stood in Dolly's, which is a emporium which sells pretty much anything you need to be a fashionable person. 46:45.107 --> 46:50.912 Yeah, to blend in in Camden, you'd need to spend quite a lot of money here at Dolly's, wouldn't you, to get your full kit. 46:51.272 --> 46:54.134 There's studded fingerless gloves, which everybody needs. 46:54.334 --> 46:57.196 I've seen one up there that is just a raised finger. 46:57.736 --> 46:58.557 Oh, on a belt buckle. 46:58.597 --> 46:59.337 On a belt buckle. 46:59.357 --> 47:00.818 Do you see there towards the top right? 47:00.858 --> 47:01.519 I certainly do. 47:01.559 --> 47:02.760 That's a statement of intent, isn't it? 47:02.780 --> 47:06.762 It's giving people the finger 24 hours a day, seven days a week. 47:06.782 --> 47:07.523 From the groin. 47:07.643 --> 47:14.808 From the groin is expressing something inside me that I think, you know, could be usefully expressed on a belt buckle. 47:15.008 --> 47:17.590 And there's a very good range of hats here, Adam, as well. 47:17.870 --> 47:20.051 As you know, like, chubby hats are very fashionable. 47:20.071 --> 47:20.772 Do you work here, sir? 47:21.912 --> 47:23.833 Hello, we're Adam and Joe from BBC Six Music. 47:24.233 --> 47:24.974 What's your name, sir? 47:24.994 --> 47:25.734 My name is Assam. 47:26.234 --> 47:27.094 I said nice to meet you. 47:27.274 --> 47:32.096 We're just trying to figure out what the kids are wearing in Camden at the moment because it's a very trendy place, isn't it? 47:32.317 --> 47:33.517 Brilliant. 47:33.537 --> 47:35.338 Which hat should I go for? 47:35.358 --> 47:36.778 I mean, there's a straight bowler there. 47:36.838 --> 47:38.439 No one's wearing bowlers, are they? 47:38.459 --> 47:40.780 You're being recommended one by the shop staff now. 47:41.420 --> 47:43.221 He's going for the top hat. 47:43.761 --> 47:44.361 What's your name, sir? 47:44.742 --> 47:45.122 Usain. 47:45.942 --> 47:47.964 Jose, nice to meet you. 47:48.524 --> 47:51.187 You have immediately picked out for me a top hat. 47:51.407 --> 47:52.048 Why was that? 47:52.148 --> 47:53.809 Why did you think I'm a top hat kind of guy? 47:53.869 --> 47:55.090 How much is this one, sir? 48:03.402 --> 48:06.807 It's because, you know, this one comes expensive, it's made in England. 48:06.867 --> 48:08.469 Ah, this is where we start haggling, right? 48:08.869 --> 48:10.391 It's not made in China. 48:11.092 --> 48:12.254 Cut to the chase, what's the price? 48:13.095 --> 48:13.435 45 fan. 48:13.455 --> 48:14.156 45 quid! 48:14.377 --> 48:15.859 Alright, I'll give you £30 cash. 48:15.939 --> 48:15.999 Er... 48:19.122 --> 48:20.783 £30. 48:19.762 --> 48:20.783 I'm not allowed to sell £30. 48:20.823 --> 48:26.545 What I'll do, which is my best price, and I'll get you this count, is because you know how the tour is. 48:26.725 --> 48:29.646 Actually, we charge two of these people five pound extra. 48:30.026 --> 48:31.166 Flipping eggs, I think you heard of your first. 48:31.186 --> 48:32.646 And it's because you know how the tour is. 48:32.847 --> 48:34.287 We will get you five of this count. 48:34.307 --> 48:35.047 You can have it for £40. 48:35.307 --> 48:36.248 40 quid. 48:36.388 --> 48:36.828 How about this? 48:36.928 --> 48:38.868 Adam, I've got to say that was really bad haggling. 48:38.928 --> 48:39.229 Was it? 48:39.249 --> 48:40.289 I mean, you went down by 25%. 48:40.549 --> 48:42.390 You should have cut it right down. 48:42.410 --> 48:43.750 You should have gone in on £15. 48:43.790 --> 48:44.250 You reckon? 48:44.290 --> 48:44.570 Yeah. 48:44.670 --> 48:45.010 How about this? 48:45.030 --> 48:45.551 15 quid. 48:47.151 --> 48:49.633 It's too late now because you can't backtrack now. 48:49.653 --> 48:52.155 I just bought someone a pair of shades. 48:52.255 --> 48:54.357 A 7 quid, the robot shades. 48:54.397 --> 48:58.260 Am I going to invest £40 for a hat I'm never going to wear again after I introduce magic? 48:58.300 --> 49:00.721 You know, actually this is high quality. 49:00.741 --> 49:01.862 It's top of two, yeah? 49:02.243 --> 49:04.304 So you can use fancy dress body. 49:04.805 --> 49:07.146 What about, could you recommend a t-shirt for me? 49:07.206 --> 49:09.388 Because I don't feel very trendy here in Camden. 49:09.828 --> 49:12.911 Can you pick out a nice t-shirt that might make me a bit trendier? 49:13.471 --> 49:15.413 Bart Simpson dressed as Bart Marley. 49:15.453 --> 49:17.635 But the key for me is I want to be really trendy. 49:17.715 --> 49:19.376 I want to be fashionable. 49:19.416 --> 49:20.998 He wants girls to look at him and think he's not 40. 49:33.548 --> 49:38.349 That's exactly what I want. 49:38.389 --> 49:39.690 That's got a dirty word on it. 49:40.430 --> 49:41.830 We can't swear on this programme. 49:41.890 --> 49:43.010 That's got the F-bomb on it. 49:43.391 --> 49:43.931 Sorry then. 49:44.531 --> 49:46.171 The killers. 49:46.431 --> 49:50.012 You think it's the band The Killers from a distance, but when you get up close, who's on it? 49:50.592 --> 49:53.193 It's Bin Laden, Osama bin Laden. 49:53.573 --> 49:56.414 It's George Bush, Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein. 49:58.414 --> 49:59.455 They are all the killers. 49:59.655 --> 50:02.637 You know the one I like best is Bart Marley. 50:02.777 --> 50:04.859 Bart Marley is good. 50:04.979 --> 50:07.921 I thought you might like it. 50:08.401 --> 50:13.905 If I buy that top hat then I have to wear the top hat and Joe has to wear the Bart Marley t-shirt to introduce madness. 50:13.925 --> 50:14.486 What about that Joe? 50:15.806 --> 50:20.429 Yeah, okay then. 50:20.449 --> 50:23.030 If that's what the kids are wearing, is it? 50:23.250 --> 50:23.791 Yeah, yeah. 50:24.751 --> 50:26.292 There we go, I've got to do it in that case. 50:26.472 --> 50:27.633 Hey, thank you so much for your help. 50:29.221 --> 50:30.522 Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's there. 50:30.702 --> 50:33.303 Live at the Camden Crawl, as they were last night. 50:33.363 --> 50:34.323 That was zero. 50:34.383 --> 50:40.105 You can log on to pbc.co.uk forward slash six music to see some pictures from that gig, if you'd like. 50:40.686 --> 50:41.426 Do you want to, Joe? 50:41.566 --> 50:42.386 Yes, please. 50:42.466 --> 50:43.787 OK, you can do that shortly. 50:43.967 --> 50:49.269 And we're coming live today from the Camden Crawl, hence the unusual Atmos. 50:50.350 --> 50:53.571 And we're having a great time here in a kind of a kind of a bar area. 50:53.711 --> 50:58.033 We have 20 members of Black Squadron here with us, live human beings. 50:58.173 --> 50:58.853 Hello, Black Squadron. 50:59.966 --> 51:05.428 There you go, you see they're very chirpy and alert and they're having an amazing, an amazing time, aren't you? 51:05.548 --> 51:08.710 I mean, I can just tell that you're having a brilliant time. 51:08.750 --> 51:12.011 This is about the most fun they've ever had in their lives. 51:12.451 --> 51:18.554 And these are young people who've had exciting lives and they've done amazing things, but nothing quite so extraordinary as this. 51:19.094 --> 51:23.696 It's like, can you imagine what it would have been like to be in the studio for Swap Shop? 51:24.256 --> 51:28.298 with Noel Edmonds and John Craven and Keith Chegwin. 51:28.378 --> 51:29.039 Very like this. 51:29.279 --> 51:30.460 It would have been like this. 51:33.121 --> 51:35.282 Well there we go, that's evocative stuff. 51:35.302 --> 51:37.964 So listen, we're going to do some more text the nations. 51:38.024 --> 51:41.846 Our theme today is all about non-serious injury. 51:42.226 --> 51:49.550 And we've discovered an extraordinary non-serious injury here in the bar amongst our invited guests. 51:49.710 --> 51:54.994 Before we discover what that injury is, shall we have the jingle, but shall we have Black Squadron sing along to the jingle? 51:55.635 --> 51:56.836 That's an interesting idea. 51:56.976 --> 51:59.218 I didn't say it's a good idea, it's an interesting idea. 51:59.238 --> 52:00.719 Are you in a position to do that, Squadron? 52:02.600 --> 52:03.921 Okay, fire off the jingle. 52:04.061 --> 52:04.922 Will they be able to hear it? 52:05.362 --> 52:06.163 Okay, fire it off. 52:06.283 --> 52:07.024 Text the nation! 52:07.044 --> 52:08.165 Text, text, text! 52:08.405 --> 52:11.187 Text the nation! 52:11.247 --> 52:12.208 What if I don't want to? 52:12.468 --> 52:13.168 Text the nation! 52:13.289 --> 52:14.289 What do you mean there? 52:14.429 --> 52:15.190 Is that a problem? 52:15.210 --> 52:15.991 It doesn't matter, text! 52:17.777 --> 52:19.779 Black Squadron, get out! 52:20.640 --> 52:21.481 How is this great? 52:21.501 --> 52:24.283 Well, there's something a tiny bit humiliating about it, isn't there? 52:24.744 --> 52:33.132 I mean, when you're on your own in your house, you imagine this kind of world, but when you actually see the world for real, it's not quite what you thought it could be. 52:33.373 --> 52:34.193 People singing along? 52:34.394 --> 52:35.435 No, that was magnificent. 52:35.695 --> 52:39.179 I think that was sung in exactly the right sort of level of dejection. 52:43.840 --> 52:53.123 As I said the subject of this week's text the nation is non-serious injuries and Adam was just talking about owner one of our listeners texted in about a piece of lead pencil That's still lodged in his hand. 52:53.143 --> 52:55.844 I've got the same injury and you can see what have you got there? 52:55.864 --> 52:57.244 You've got a piece of pencil lodged in your hand 52:57.264 --> 52:58.405 Yeah, like right in the middle. 52:59.385 --> 53:00.466 It might even... Do you know what? 53:00.706 --> 53:06.169 Now that I think about it, actually this may not be true, but it was around the time that I was at school with Guy Ritchie. 53:06.609 --> 53:07.170 Oh no! 53:07.290 --> 53:09.491 The famous film director done it to you. 53:09.531 --> 53:10.592 He'd give you a name then. 53:11.348 --> 53:11.708 Yeah. 53:11.828 --> 53:12.309 Lead mitt. 53:12.909 --> 53:13.470 Or something. 53:13.690 --> 53:14.330 Lead hands. 53:14.410 --> 53:14.730 Yeah. 53:15.911 --> 53:16.872 It's like that, lead hands. 53:17.252 --> 53:23.697 But I'm not sure if he actually inflicted the injury on me or if it was like a scrap and someone else actually stuck the pencil in. 53:23.937 --> 53:28.640 But you can still see a little grey circle there where the pencil went right 53:28.840 --> 53:30.441 But this is another fascinating area. 53:30.501 --> 53:37.146 People who are, to me anyway, people who are carrying around peculiar things lodged in their bodies, right? 53:37.186 --> 53:37.927 Everyone loves that. 53:38.307 --> 53:41.789 They always have pictures in the sun, don't they, of people with big nails in their heads? 53:41.809 --> 53:42.770 And that sells millions. 53:42.930 --> 53:44.011 It's like Iron Man, isn't it? 53:44.111 --> 53:44.571 Exactly. 53:45.072 --> 53:46.753 So what's the gentleman's name here? 53:46.773 --> 53:47.714 It's Matthew. 53:47.894 --> 53:48.494 Hello, Matthew. 53:48.774 --> 53:49.775 Thanks for coming this morning. 53:49.795 --> 53:52.997 Now, Matthew, you've got an alien, a foreign object lodged in your body. 53:53.057 --> 53:53.958 Is that not correct? 53:54.378 --> 53:55.379 Yeah, that's correct. 53:55.399 --> 53:57.801 Sounds slightly filthy, but it's no bad thing. 53:58.041 --> 54:00.982 I've got the same thing, a lead pencil, but stuck in my eyebrow. 54:01.762 --> 54:02.863 And it was a coloured pencil, right? 54:02.883 --> 54:05.604 It was a coloured blue pencil, and you can see the blue lead. 54:05.744 --> 54:07.004 Come over here if you would. 54:07.524 --> 54:08.505 I want Joe to see this. 54:08.565 --> 54:11.186 I know, I did have a good look at it, and it's extraordinary. 54:11.226 --> 54:13.707 It's just between the top of the nose and the eyebrow. 54:14.007 --> 54:17.928 You can actually see the tip of a little bit of blue crayon. 54:18.068 --> 54:20.049 Because it's actually glasses, though, so no. 54:20.289 --> 54:20.469 Right. 54:21.169 --> 54:27.532 Essentially what's happened is that you've had a little kind of makeshift tattoo job, because that's all tattooing is, right? 54:28.213 --> 54:31.694 And they're basically just stick little bits of dye and colour in people's bodies. 54:31.714 --> 54:32.615 To a degree, yeah. 54:32.755 --> 54:33.595 What do you mean to a degree? 54:33.615 --> 54:34.736 That's exactly what it is. 54:34.776 --> 54:38.378 Because the implement with which they're applying the dye is removed. 54:39.358 --> 54:41.660 And that's what's different here, it's still in there. 54:41.900 --> 54:43.101 He's got it in his face. 54:43.121 --> 54:44.341 It didn't break off though, did it? 54:44.381 --> 54:45.722 Yeah, yeah, it's the actual lead. 54:46.083 --> 54:48.204 It's the lead in there, Adam Buxton. 54:48.244 --> 54:48.704 Flipping heck. 54:48.724 --> 54:51.986 I don't know why my mum never thought of taking it out. 54:52.006 --> 54:53.187 Because he's taking it to be the host. 54:53.207 --> 54:54.088 She thought it looked good. 54:54.448 --> 54:55.009 That's amazing. 54:55.029 --> 54:58.651 Do you get more respect amongst crayonists that you hang out with? 54:58.711 --> 55:01.613 Yeah, they reckon you're kind of a tough guy. 55:01.813 --> 55:03.194 High up in the crayon land. 55:03.254 --> 55:03.994 That's really good. 55:04.315 --> 55:09.018 That's a pretty good non-serious injuries, but you're going to carry that around for the rest of your life, do you think? 55:09.418 --> 55:09.798 Hopefully. 55:09.958 --> 55:11.119 Hopefully, yeah, fingers crossed. 55:11.199 --> 55:13.521 It's probably why you work its way out at some point. 55:14.221 --> 55:16.123 Here's a very good one that came in via text. 55:16.263 --> 55:25.349 This is from Betty in Highbury who says, I was once trying to crumble a bit of effervescent vitamin C like one of those tablets and a shard flew into my eye. 55:25.449 --> 55:25.709 What? 55:26.629 --> 55:28.731 The more my eyes ran, the more it fizzed. 55:30.832 --> 55:35.454 It was terrible, it felt like a Catherine Wheel firework going off in my eyeball, imagine that! 55:36.595 --> 55:38.015 F of S and pill in your eye. 55:38.935 --> 55:40.516 Why have they not done that on Jackass? 55:40.676 --> 55:43.777 Man, this could be, we could be putting together material for Jackass 3, couldn't we? 55:43.998 --> 55:44.738 I would love to see. 55:44.758 --> 55:47.279 We could turn ourselves, there's a British version of Jackass, isn't there? 55:47.319 --> 55:48.599 Those Welsh guys, what are they called? 55:48.619 --> 55:48.940 Dirty Sanchez. 55:49.120 --> 55:49.520 Exactly. 55:50.540 --> 55:52.361 Is it too late to jump on that bandwagon? 55:52.501 --> 55:53.301 No, never too late. 55:53.361 --> 55:56.442 Is it very old to jump on a bandwagon? 55:56.462 --> 55:58.122 Five years too late. 55:58.982 --> 56:04.364 With stuff like putting a fizzy tablet in your eye, that is a bandwagon worth jumping back on. 56:04.564 --> 56:06.064 Now it sounds like we're encouraging people to do that. 56:06.084 --> 56:08.325 Obviously we're not encouraging you to do that. 56:08.345 --> 56:10.005 It's a very stupid thing to do. 56:10.025 --> 56:12.366 But also wicked. 56:12.506 --> 56:13.486 No, not wicked at all. 56:13.506 --> 56:16.007 You could cause blindness and all types of things could happen. 56:16.767 --> 56:17.948 Um, shall we have a record? 56:18.588 --> 56:20.108 What, are you upset about the thought of that? 56:20.129 --> 56:21.149 Oh, it's my free play, yeah. 56:21.489 --> 56:21.769 I am. 56:22.269 --> 56:22.930 Oh, I think that's enough. 56:22.950 --> 56:24.890 Those are two very, very strong submissions, aren't they? 56:24.910 --> 56:25.231 Very much so. 56:25.311 --> 56:26.351 Thank you very much, Matthew. 56:26.871 --> 56:27.872 Uh, this is my free play. 56:27.912 --> 56:28.972 This is Richie Spice. 56:29.172 --> 56:30.873 He's a reggae sort of a gentleman. 56:30.893 --> 56:31.053 Yep. 56:31.293 --> 56:35.215 And this is his song talking about how the ute dem gone cold. 56:35.615 --> 56:35.875 Why? 56:35.915 --> 56:36.475 What's wrong with him? 56:36.535 --> 56:39.276 Well, uh, I think they've just, they're cold hearted. 56:39.797 --> 56:41.978 I thought you didn't approve of that view of youth. 56:42.418 --> 56:43.558 I've changed my mind, have you? 56:43.998 --> 56:45.119 This is Richie Spice. 56:46.391 --> 56:48.754 I sought the big, great, dear castle. 56:49.135 --> 56:50.977 It is the top of the hour. 56:51.097 --> 56:52.479 Ooh, that's wonderful. 56:52.819 --> 56:56.023 I got so bored with the last hour and glad it's gone. 56:56.364 --> 56:57.445 Now here's the new one. 56:57.545 --> 56:59.087 It's exciting and it's new. 56:59.288 --> 56:59.528 Howdy. 57:00.410 --> 57:01.711 GMT there with kids. 57:01.731 --> 57:06.856 This is Adam and Joe coming live from the Camden crawl for BBC six music It's a great pleasure to be here. 57:06.896 --> 57:21.530 We're in a bar We should we should keep reminding people we're in a bar if you're confused by the unusual background noises We're in the market bar and we've got 20 black squadron listeners here elite listeners who entered a competition for which they had to log on to the website like at 9 a.m. 57:21.570 --> 57:24.373 On a Wednesday and then the first 20 10 people 57:25.874 --> 57:28.355 whose names were picked, they were able to come and bring a friend. 57:28.655 --> 57:30.295 So this really is the creme de la creme. 57:30.515 --> 57:31.015 Absolutely. 57:31.275 --> 57:34.336 People said that it was actually quite hard to find the link on the website. 57:34.356 --> 57:35.617 Do you find that, Squadron members? 57:35.977 --> 57:40.938 We really put people through it, so you are the best of the best, the elite, the geniuses at finding links. 57:41.098 --> 57:44.679 I'd say the most laid-back member is... is your name Nick there? 57:45.439 --> 57:50.144 I mean, you're looking pretty cool considering where you are and what's going on around you. 57:51.905 --> 57:53.287 He's our special ops guy, Nick. 57:53.487 --> 57:53.787 Is he? 57:53.847 --> 57:56.530 Yeah, we send him into all kinds of tough situations. 57:56.550 --> 57:57.291 How are you doing there, Nick? 57:57.591 --> 58:01.194 Yeah, I'm just trying to make the best of it, to be honest with you. 58:01.275 --> 58:01.875 It's going well. 58:02.055 --> 58:02.636 I'm enjoying it. 58:02.876 --> 58:07.358 That is the voice of an undercover Black Ops genius. 58:07.438 --> 58:08.979 Yeah, he's not giving anything away. 58:09.079 --> 58:15.962 Now listen, Chaps, we're going to talk about Steven and Stevenage, just to fill you in if you have never listened to this show before. 58:16.562 --> 58:31.229 Steven is a thing that started out about six months ago when we were talking about Juvenilia, and someone sent us in a comic, someone called Steve Curran, and he had made a comic about the action adventures of himself, and it was just called Steven, exclamation mark. 58:32.009 --> 58:36.933 And we thought it was a funny idea that he would, you know, in this comic just run around. 58:36.953 --> 58:37.874 And what would happen in the comic? 58:37.894 --> 58:40.236 I don't know, he'd just run around and shout, Stephen! 58:40.596 --> 58:41.257 Just coming! 58:41.277 --> 58:42.138 And that would be about as exciting. 58:42.158 --> 58:44.240 Yeah, people who needed his assistance would shout his name. 58:44.280 --> 58:48.743 But then another listener suggested this could become a meme, I believe is the correct word. 58:48.763 --> 58:51.646 A way that listeners could communicate to each other in public spaces. 58:52.126 --> 58:58.091 And this is kind of, despite us, taken off a little and resulted in a lot of gigs around the country being interrupted by shouts of Stephen. 58:58.792 --> 59:05.558 Now, people who listen to the show like this and find a kind of fidelity in it, but other people hate it. 59:05.638 --> 59:08.880 Well, some people find it a little irritating and invasive. 59:09.260 --> 59:12.963 But then Stephen, you know, went to a different level this week. 59:13.444 --> 59:14.124 I'll tell you why. 59:14.164 --> 59:17.407 Here's a message from Paul Jeffs. 59:17.547 --> 59:18.768 No, and Alex Herety. 59:19.028 --> 59:21.030 This was pointed out to us by many people. 59:21.130 --> 59:23.332 Sharon, Nathan, Kate and Reading, Chris Chambers. 59:23.812 --> 59:28.273 Anyway, it says, I've been listening to your podcast for a few months now and I really enjoy it. 59:28.533 --> 59:35.535 The Stephen just coming thingy thingamabob I find quite amusing, but I'd never experienced it in my own day-to-day life. 59:35.635 --> 59:36.395 Until today! 59:36.815 --> 59:45.637 I'd just got into the car with my friend and Radio 1's Edith Bowman came blurting out and she was having a lunch date-type feature with Simon Pegg. 59:46.377 --> 59:50.441 I just caught the end of a phone call from a listener to the show who said, blah, blah, blah, thanks. 59:50.881 --> 59:53.384 Can I just say something to the nation? 59:53.664 --> 59:54.685 And let's play the clip now. 59:54.745 --> 59:55.065 Why not? 59:55.105 --> 59:55.365 Yeah. 59:55.886 --> 59:56.246 Mark. 59:56.707 --> 59:57.027 Yeah. 59:57.067 --> 59:57.928 Thank you so much, mate. 59:57.948 --> 59:58.588 It's lovely to talk to you. 59:58.608 --> 01:00:00.030 I'd like to say one thing to the nation. 01:00:01.151 --> 01:00:02.032 Steven! 01:00:02.052 --> 01:00:02.852 Thanks. 01:00:03.193 --> 01:00:03.613 Steven. 01:00:03.653 --> 01:00:04.174 Steven. 01:00:04.354 --> 01:00:04.714 Yeah. 01:00:04.734 --> 01:00:06.376 I was a bit scared there for a second. 01:00:06.696 --> 01:00:06.896 What? 01:00:06.936 --> 01:00:07.236 We're live. 01:00:07.276 --> 01:00:07.897 Who's Steven? 01:00:07.937 --> 01:00:09.038 What was he going to say? 01:00:09.679 --> 01:00:10.099 Steven. 01:00:10.139 --> 01:00:10.860 Why did he say Steven? 01:00:10.940 --> 01:00:11.901 I have no idea, Simon. 01:00:12.717 --> 01:00:16.258 So there you go, that is an Adam and Jo listener phoning Radio 1. 01:00:16.738 --> 01:00:22.979 Unfortunately, Stephen was slightly covered up by Edith Bowman there, as he was legitimately worried that he was just about to swear, I think. 01:00:23.119 --> 01:00:26.359 But Bowman had no idea what was going on, neither did Simon. 01:00:26.600 --> 01:00:30.320 Well, the point is made by Alex Herety here in his message. 01:00:30.540 --> 01:00:36.321 He says, point one, why is Bowman, one of the members of the big British castle, not listening to the Adam and Jo show? 01:00:36.701 --> 01:00:39.762 Or at the very least, up to date on BBC matters and slogans? 01:00:40.302 --> 01:00:41.203 Right, that's a good point. 01:00:41.263 --> 01:00:44.286 I mean, you know, we all know Edith Bowman's catchphrases, right? 01:00:44.446 --> 01:00:44.786 Yeah. 01:00:44.867 --> 01:00:46.588 More eggs, please, Cameron Diaz. 01:00:47.669 --> 01:00:48.410 Have a jelly bun. 01:00:48.590 --> 01:00:49.691 It's the nation's number one. 01:00:50.172 --> 01:00:52.294 And sort your wig out, Uncle Dick. 01:00:52.614 --> 01:00:53.295 That kind of thing. 01:00:54.176 --> 01:00:55.357 Everyone knows those. 01:00:55.397 --> 01:00:58.280 We know all Bowman's catchphrases, so why doesn't she know about Steven? 01:00:58.500 --> 01:00:58.980 Point two. 01:01:00.141 --> 01:01:01.702 What was the guy doing, right? 01:01:02.363 --> 01:01:05.185 He's got... Alex Heraty's got a problem with the actual Stephener. 01:01:05.545 --> 01:01:12.990 He says, the Stephen concept I thought was just for gigs or events with large groups of fans that would be bonded together by it. 01:01:13.030 --> 01:01:14.091 But no, that's absolutely fine. 01:01:14.111 --> 01:01:19.555 He's applied it to the radio... Yeah, I think we can only give that guy credit who phoned in there and did the Stephen. 01:01:20.115 --> 01:01:26.861 He concludes Alex Herety, all I hope is that the good name of Steven can ride through this troubled period in its life and come out the other side. 01:01:27.181 --> 01:01:30.684 I would say that it's doing well if it's being shouted out on Radio One. 01:01:30.704 --> 01:01:33.746 Well, we've made Natasha Khan from Back 4 Lashes annoyed, haven't we? 01:01:33.766 --> 01:01:34.567 A little bit, yeah. 01:01:34.727 --> 01:01:38.850 We've kind of intruded on the world of the Fleet Foxes, who now get it wherever they go in the world. 01:01:40.211 --> 01:01:43.073 and we've also made a bit of a mess on Radio 1. 01:01:43.494 --> 01:01:57.743 So we'd like to ask Elite Squadron, who are here with us in Camden today, whether they would vote to kill the Steven meme, whether they think it should be crushed before it gets out of hand and too annoying, or whether they think it should carry on and be encouraged. 01:01:57.763 --> 01:01:58.884 Are we going to take a show of hands? 01:01:58.964 --> 01:02:04.748 Well, just before we do that, here's a message from someone very much putting the case against continuing with Stevenage. 01:02:05.068 --> 01:02:07.470 This is Charlie Tittle from London. 01:02:07.810 --> 01:02:08.370 He calls us, 01:02:09.551 --> 01:02:13.012 Adam... Adamano Bucksters and Josephus Corn Life. 01:02:13.572 --> 01:02:14.033 Good work. 01:02:14.293 --> 01:02:15.493 So, you know... Corn Life? 01:02:15.613 --> 01:02:15.853 Yeah. 01:02:16.053 --> 01:02:18.694 You have to take that into account when listening to his comments, I think. 01:02:19.314 --> 01:02:25.297 He says, I think the problem with Steven is that it's becoming a little inverted commas garlic bread, you know? 01:02:25.317 --> 01:02:26.577 Do you know what he means by that? 01:02:26.617 --> 01:02:27.037 No, I don't. 01:02:27.057 --> 01:02:27.817 What does he mean by that? 01:02:27.837 --> 01:02:34.740 He says, it's the kind of thing lads in pubs would shout for about 18 months after Peter Kay found his fame. 01:02:35.000 --> 01:02:36.541 I don't know what he's talking about there. 01:02:36.862 --> 01:02:45.089 But he says, I'm not saying that it's annoying, but maybe it's time to put Steven to bed, like in the Jerry Halliwell video where she has a funeral for her stage persona, Ginger. 01:02:45.109 --> 01:02:45.910 Remember that video? 01:02:46.110 --> 01:02:47.551 Yeah, it was rubbish, wasn't it? 01:02:47.771 --> 01:02:48.612 You get my drift. 01:02:49.033 --> 01:02:59.982 And it doesn't mean that one day there won't be a new and all exciting, a new and exciting call and response type catchphrase for the Adam and Jo Show on 6 Music, but maybe Steven is sadly coming to its end, says Charlie Tittle. 01:03:01.003 --> 01:03:02.464 Well, what do you think then? 01:03:02.484 --> 01:03:03.484 We should put it to the vote here. 01:03:03.724 --> 01:03:08.246 Yeah, but I mean, I would hope that Black Squadron here would vote to continue Stevenage, wouldn't you? 01:03:08.686 --> 01:03:09.467 I think it's fun. 01:03:09.887 --> 01:03:10.287 How is it? 01:03:10.487 --> 01:03:12.208 I think it's easily avoided in your life. 01:03:12.268 --> 01:03:16.150 It's not so all intrusive that it's ruining people's lives, don't you think? 01:03:16.570 --> 01:03:17.770 Well, I think we should find out. 01:03:17.910 --> 01:03:19.971 Have you been giving this some thought, Elite Squadron? 01:03:20.251 --> 01:03:21.272 They're nodding wisely. 01:03:21.292 --> 01:03:26.354 They've been thinking, okay, I think when I point at you, you've got to shout either the word kill. 01:03:27.054 --> 01:03:28.915 Yeah, you've all shouted that before in the past. 01:03:30.365 --> 01:03:31.965 Or the word Stephen, all right? 01:03:32.966 --> 01:03:33.346 Here we go. 01:03:33.386 --> 01:03:34.906 This is a big moment, isn't it? 01:03:35.146 --> 01:03:35.446 Yeah. 01:03:35.706 --> 01:03:36.086 Here we go. 01:03:38.467 --> 01:03:39.187 There you see? 01:03:39.607 --> 01:03:41.588 Nobody, not a single person shouted kill. 01:03:41.768 --> 01:03:42.008 No. 01:03:42.708 --> 01:03:44.849 There we go, it will not die, despite our best efforts. 01:03:45.469 --> 01:03:52.710 But we could, you know, we'd like to hear your opinion, so you can email us Adam and Joe at... Oh, it's behind me though. 01:03:53.391 --> 01:03:54.571 There it is, Adam and Joe. 01:03:55.211 --> 01:04:14.240 dot 6 music at bbc.co.uk or you can text us 64046 if you're communicating with us during the week then please don't text just email us but we'd love to hear your thoughts about whether we should continue with Stephen or whether we should kill Stephen off yeah here's some music this is the killers with the world we live in 01:04:14.660 --> 01:04:16.181 I wasn't really listening to the lyrics there. 01:04:16.201 --> 01:04:17.662 What was he saying about the world we live in? 01:04:18.022 --> 01:04:18.683 I'll tell you later. 01:04:18.963 --> 01:04:20.784 That was the killers with the world we live in. 01:04:22.065 --> 01:04:27.849 And before they were known as the killers, that band called themselves the Genius Sex Poets. 01:04:28.329 --> 01:04:29.490 Yeah, it's a better name, isn't it? 01:04:29.510 --> 01:04:30.551 Yeah, that was a good switch. 01:04:31.411 --> 01:04:31.932 Definitely. 01:04:32.032 --> 01:04:38.319 This is Adam and Joe here at the Camden Crawl and we've only got about 40 minutes left of the show. 01:04:38.459 --> 01:04:39.841 It's gone whizzling by hasn't it? 01:04:39.861 --> 01:04:41.102 It's absolutely whizzled past. 01:04:41.322 --> 01:04:45.687 We've still got some jokes coming your way in the second, in the last half hour of the programme. 01:04:45.987 --> 01:04:46.868 Some made up jokes. 01:04:47.289 --> 01:04:49.071 Why were you looking at me like that? 01:04:49.391 --> 01:04:51.574 It was just fun, it's fun to look at your face. 01:04:52.855 --> 01:04:53.676 It makes me smile. 01:04:54.096 --> 01:05:04.667 During that record we gave all the Elite Squadron members who've come to Camden to watch the show this morning an exclusive Adam & Jo BBC 6 Music Steven t-shirt. 01:05:05.087 --> 01:05:07.070 There have been 50 of these t-shirts made. 01:05:07.110 --> 01:05:10.433 We've got rid of 20 of them today and they look magnificent. 01:05:10.533 --> 01:05:13.876 They're a lovely simple font, a white font on black. 01:05:14.577 --> 01:05:18.219 And it really is making Elite Squadron look very uniform. 01:05:18.439 --> 01:05:20.439 So Steven on the front and just coming on the back. 01:05:20.559 --> 01:05:28.222 I mean, I'm getting a sort of surge of empowerment, just seeing all our listeners here dressed in uniform, you know? 01:05:28.863 --> 01:05:31.584 But for, you know, the thing is, for the detractors, 01:05:32.344 --> 01:05:37.029 You may as well be wearing a t-shirt that just says loser or nerd on the front, you know what I mean? 01:05:37.229 --> 01:05:38.791 I disagree, I think it's a heroic t-shirt. 01:05:38.811 --> 01:05:40.072 I thought you were against it! 01:05:40.132 --> 01:05:41.934 I'm just balanced, it's the BBC, isn't it? 01:05:41.994 --> 01:05:44.056 You just fly around with a prevailing wind. 01:05:44.436 --> 01:05:45.878 Exactly, I've got no opinions. 01:05:45.938 --> 01:05:47.799 You were the one that thought we should kill off Steven. 01:05:48.100 --> 01:05:50.362 Yeah, well I got voted down, I obey Elite Squadron. 01:05:50.522 --> 01:05:51.123 Yeah, fair enough. 01:05:51.623 --> 01:05:59.268 I've got a free play for you now listeners, and this is a track from pavement's album crooked rain crooked rain But it's got a swear in it right. 01:05:59.729 --> 01:06:14.478 Oh, it's got the f-word in it So what I've done is I've inserted a little pirate radio interruption for you good This is the kind of thing that you might hear if you listen to analog radio And you're driving along through the wave bands and suddenly a little pirate radio interrupts. 01:06:14.498 --> 01:06:16.340 You're listening That's what's gonna happen in this track 01:06:18.621 --> 01:06:22.768 Fiona, you're looking good. 01:06:22.929 --> 01:06:24.271 It's on your skirt. 01:06:24.291 --> 01:06:26.034 That is a really nice skirt. 01:06:29.851 --> 01:06:40.114 This is Adam and Jo here on BBC6 Music coming to you live from a bar in Camden Town as part of the Camden Crawl, which is going on for the rest of today. 01:06:40.554 --> 01:06:42.134 Get down, it's a lovely day. 01:06:42.234 --> 01:06:45.355 People are thronging through the streets of Camden. 01:06:45.595 --> 01:06:47.275 It's a decent day. 01:06:47.715 --> 01:06:48.376 It's not raining. 01:06:48.396 --> 01:06:49.896 It's not absolutely pouring, which is good. 01:06:50.736 --> 01:07:02.363 Now, just before we go into the news, Joe, I was watching TV a couple of weeks back at Easter, and I was struck by a bit of continuity announcing, because they're getting quite uppity, aren't they, the continuity people sometimes? 01:07:02.383 --> 01:07:09.448 Yes, they tell jokes, they do funny voices, they make sarcastic comments about... They try and be our pals. 01:07:09.728 --> 01:07:10.168 Exactly. 01:07:10.268 --> 01:07:11.369 I don't want them to be my pals. 01:07:11.389 --> 01:07:11.709 Don't you? 01:07:11.969 --> 01:07:18.033 No, I want to keep them... You just like a sort of... Yeah, sort of a detached authoritarian voice guiding you through the schedules. 01:07:18.073 --> 01:07:19.174 Next is News Night. 01:07:19.974 --> 01:07:20.695 That kind of thing. 01:07:20.735 --> 01:07:21.876 I don't want any opinions about it. 01:07:21.896 --> 01:07:26.200 Well, that would be a good cost-cutting measure because television is going through terrible financial troubles. 01:07:26.220 --> 01:07:28.081 There's no one advertises on it anymore. 01:07:28.642 --> 01:07:33.225 So they could cut some costs by having the continuity announcer... Stephen Hawking voice. 01:07:33.306 --> 01:07:34.206 A robot voice. 01:07:34.246 --> 01:07:35.647 Fred, I believe it's called. 01:07:36.488 --> 01:07:44.017 Well, the continuity announced to try and jazz up the fact that the... Okay, let's see if you can guess what film he was introducing. 01:07:44.538 --> 01:07:47.161 And now it's time for our big Easter movie. 01:07:47.502 --> 01:07:49.805 And legend has it, it's a corker. 01:07:51.691 --> 01:07:52.372 Uh, Legend? 01:07:52.973 --> 01:07:53.273 No. 01:07:53.513 --> 01:07:53.814 No. 01:07:54.354 --> 01:07:56.937 He was introducing Arthur. 01:07:57.438 --> 01:07:57.678 What? 01:07:58.139 --> 01:07:58.519 Arthur. 01:07:58.720 --> 01:08:01.883 Not the film with Dudley, cuddly Dudley, but Arthur. 01:08:02.244 --> 01:08:04.887 Starring Keira Knightley and Clive Owen. 01:08:04.967 --> 01:08:05.588 King Arthur. 01:08:05.648 --> 01:08:06.288 King Arthur. 01:08:06.308 --> 01:08:06.388 Yeah. 01:08:07.229 --> 01:08:08.651 Legend has it, it's a stinker. 01:08:08.871 --> 01:08:09.511 Well, exactly. 01:08:09.532 --> 01:08:10.753 Wouldn't that be the correct announcement? 01:08:10.773 --> 01:08:12.634 I mean, how disingenuous is that? 01:08:12.835 --> 01:08:14.877 Legend has it, it's a corker. 01:08:15.137 --> 01:08:15.397 Right. 01:08:15.577 --> 01:08:16.578 That's outrageous. 01:08:16.798 --> 01:08:24.386 I mean, you may as well introduce Van Helsing by saying, prepare to have your blood sucked out by one of the greatest films of all time. 01:08:25.547 --> 01:08:40.981 you know which would be a heinous lie total lie like how about this how would you introduce my best friend's wedding which is on tonight at 9 on Channel 4 oh prepare to be lowered into the pit of hell very slowly by the most boring new man and woman in the world that would be the 01:08:41.061 --> 01:08:42.041 honest introduction. 01:08:42.161 --> 01:08:45.783 Oh right, yeah you've got to do a special lying continuity introduction. 01:08:46.063 --> 01:08:55.006 Prepare to be lowered into a pit of fun and frolics for all the family with potentially Oscar winning performance by Rupert Everett. 01:08:55.146 --> 01:09:00.388 Yeah it's the lowered and the pit that are still in there that still make us sound quite bad. 01:09:00.408 --> 01:09:02.349 Yeah that's true isn't it. 01:09:02.429 --> 01:09:05.270 It's 11.30 here on BBC 6 Music and it's time for the news. 01:09:06.024 --> 01:09:08.366 David Bowie there with Heroes. 01:09:08.527 --> 01:09:18.076 You know what, one of the Squadron members earlier on, we were trying to think of commands for Black Squadron at the beginning of the show, and someone came up with the command, Talk like David Bowie for 30 minutes. 01:09:19.249 --> 01:09:21.130 That would be quite a difficult thing to do. 01:09:21.270 --> 01:09:23.732 For 30 whole minutes, I'd make it a bit quite easy. 01:09:24.012 --> 01:09:25.493 Yes, it would be very easy. 01:09:25.573 --> 01:09:27.895 That's extremely easy to talk like that. 01:09:27.975 --> 01:09:28.995 Could you pass the coffee? 01:09:29.276 --> 01:09:31.337 Certainly I could pass the coffee-sissity. 01:09:31.637 --> 01:09:32.117 Oh, love it. 01:09:32.318 --> 01:09:34.339 This coffee is absolutely super latissive. 01:09:34.859 --> 01:09:41.263 Its theatricality is extraordinarily... Did Brian Eno help you put this coffee together? 01:09:41.384 --> 01:09:43.365 Yes, he did, using some abstract cards. 01:09:43.585 --> 01:09:45.026 Is it bleak strategy cards? 01:09:45.046 --> 01:09:45.326 Yes. 01:09:45.626 --> 01:09:47.227 And where's that, where's that, where's that, where's that? 01:09:49.969 --> 01:09:54.091 That's one of those impressions that's sort of broken free from its source. 01:09:54.451 --> 01:09:55.511 It's just free floating. 01:09:55.711 --> 01:09:58.392 It's got very little to do with how Bowie actually speaks to that. 01:09:58.412 --> 01:10:00.053 No longer like your Jules Holland impression. 01:10:00.393 --> 01:10:01.174 What did you say? 01:10:01.254 --> 01:10:01.814 That was brilliant. 01:10:01.834 --> 01:10:02.234 It was brilliant. 01:10:02.254 --> 01:10:02.874 It was on the nail. 01:10:03.054 --> 01:10:08.537 I don't think it sounded like... If Jules Holland heard that impression that you did of him last week, I don't think he would go, you know what? 01:10:08.697 --> 01:10:10.038 He's absolutely catching me. 01:10:11.518 --> 01:10:11.899 Who was that? 01:10:12.059 --> 01:10:12.819 That was Hugh Holland. 01:10:12.939 --> 01:10:13.920 That's how he really speaks. 01:10:13.980 --> 01:10:14.921 I didn't recognise him. 01:10:16.442 --> 01:10:16.822 Yeah. 01:10:16.902 --> 01:10:18.523 Do we have the textination jingle? 01:10:18.543 --> 01:10:18.824 Yes. 01:10:21.045 --> 01:10:21.886 Textination. 01:10:21.926 --> 01:10:22.986 Text, text, text. 01:10:23.107 --> 01:10:23.847 Textination. 01:10:23.907 --> 01:10:24.848 What if I don't want to? 01:10:25.108 --> 01:10:25.808 Textination. 01:10:25.829 --> 01:10:26.329 It doesn't matter. 01:10:26.389 --> 01:10:26.629 Text. 01:10:29.011 --> 01:10:35.835 Now Text the Nation this week listeners is all about non-serious injuries that you've inflicted on yourself or other people I suppose. 01:10:35.895 --> 01:10:41.979 Stuff that hasn't resulted in any hospitalisation or permanent damage but that is cool to talk about. 01:10:42.139 --> 01:10:46.822 And don't forget if you're listening to this show on Listen Again then you can still contribute 01:10:47.342 --> 01:10:58.911 To this text donation by sending us your non-serious injuries throughout the week, you can email them on adamandjo.6musicatbbc.co.uk and they might be read out in next week's podcast. 01:10:58.991 --> 01:10:59.511 Who can tell? 01:10:59.832 --> 01:11:01.593 But here's a good one from Jen in Cardiff. 01:11:02.174 --> 01:11:07.217 She says, Dear Adam and Jo, I got a loft ladder in the face on Christmas Day. 01:11:08.458 --> 01:11:12.799 Now, there are accidents waiting to happen because they nestle on the inside of the flat. 01:11:13.219 --> 01:11:15.340 Have you got one nestle on the inside of your flat? 01:11:15.420 --> 01:11:16.020 Everyone does. 01:11:16.300 --> 01:11:17.440 Every real man does. 01:11:17.960 --> 01:11:20.981 And so you open the loft and it can come tumbling down. 01:11:21.101 --> 01:11:23.322 Because they fold up in a kind of triangle, don't they? 01:11:23.342 --> 01:11:24.962 What sort of thing is that to happen on Christmas? 01:11:25.462 --> 01:11:27.303 That's a horrible thing to happen on Christmas Day. 01:11:27.343 --> 01:11:28.023 Is there a God? 01:11:28.303 --> 01:11:30.886 If that can happen on Christmas? 01:11:31.006 --> 01:11:36.513 That's a very big debate, and the Catholics have been talking about that particular... It's true, isn't it? 01:11:36.713 --> 01:11:41.999 Loft ladders are the work of Satan anyway, so it's got no religion-threatening implications. 01:11:43.120 --> 01:11:44.802 Here's another one from Andy in Glasgow. 01:11:44.842 --> 01:11:50.046 It says, Dear Adam and Jo, a couple of years ago, whilst eating my lunch and dealing with my emails, I suffered a rather unusual eye injury. 01:11:50.547 --> 01:11:51.467 This is horrible. 01:11:51.728 --> 01:12:02.097 The sandwich I was eating, purchased from a well-known High Street baker's, was packaged in a shallow car tray, which, during a lapse of concentration, slipped as I was about to take a bite of the sandwich. 01:12:02.377 --> 01:12:02.938 You following this? 01:12:02.978 --> 01:12:03.218 Yeah. 01:12:03.979 --> 01:12:07.562 And it went into my eye, causing an extremely sore paper cut. 01:12:08.202 --> 01:12:09.283 So he got a paper cut. 01:12:09.363 --> 01:12:10.164 On the eyeball. 01:12:10.184 --> 01:12:12.926 On his eyeball. 01:12:12.986 --> 01:12:15.528 That's the second most painful ball to get a paper cut. 01:12:17.009 --> 01:12:18.030 That's terrible. 01:12:18.470 --> 01:12:20.172 How did he do that though? 01:12:20.212 --> 01:12:24.775 Somebody stubbed a cigarette out in my eye when I was 15 at a nightclub. 01:12:25.036 --> 01:12:30.000 He was chatting to a girl and I was sitting next to him and he just accidentally shoved it in my eye. 01:12:30.580 --> 01:12:35.463 And I had a cigarette burn on my eye, but I went to sleep and it miraculously recovered. 01:12:36.364 --> 01:12:43.448 The human eye is an extraordinarily resilient piece of tissue, even so you should not go putting things in it or anywhere near it, right? 01:12:43.468 --> 01:12:46.310 Don't put fizzy lozenges or cigarettes or anything like that. 01:12:49.352 --> 01:12:58.760 Well, Bowie got a lollipop in his eye, didn't he? 01:12:58.820 --> 01:12:59.340 He did! 01:12:59.440 --> 01:13:00.481 Bowie's had eye trauma. 01:13:00.501 --> 01:13:01.202 That's right. 01:13:01.522 --> 01:13:01.922 Wow. 01:13:02.303 --> 01:13:03.283 So it's all linking in? 01:13:03.844 --> 01:13:07.367 It stayed dangling out of the eye, didn't it, for some time? 01:13:07.807 --> 01:13:08.367 Oh no. 01:13:08.748 --> 01:13:09.809 That's the song he wrote about. 01:13:09.869 --> 01:13:11.350 He didn't even get very far with it. 01:13:11.730 --> 01:13:12.851 Anyway, keep those coming in. 01:13:13.431 --> 01:13:14.251 Will we return to these? 01:13:14.271 --> 01:13:16.072 We might do a couple more just before the end of the show. 01:13:16.092 --> 01:13:16.732 The text number is 64046. 01:13:17.072 --> 01:13:18.193 Really? 01:13:19.253 --> 01:13:22.014 We might run out of time, so maybe don't bother. 01:13:23.475 --> 01:13:30.898 Here's some music, and after this music, we're going to have another little visit to one of our pre-recorded packages, what we did in Camden yesterday. 01:13:30.918 --> 01:13:35.099 Yes, I think we went and polled a few people about what they thought of our sartorial choices. 01:13:35.360 --> 01:13:37.040 You'll hear that after this next track. 01:13:37.560 --> 01:13:38.761 Yeah, this is the fall, is it? 01:13:39.241 --> 01:13:41.182 Hey, Luciani, they're playing tonight at the Camden Fall. 01:13:41.542 --> 01:13:43.383 We've come a little way up the street now. 01:13:43.644 --> 01:13:45.805 Joe's wearing his Bart Marley t-shirt. 01:13:45.945 --> 01:13:46.986 Things have changed for me. 01:13:47.466 --> 01:13:48.908 And I'm wearing my top hat. 01:13:49.048 --> 01:13:50.469 I'm feeling a lot better, I have to say. 01:13:50.909 --> 01:13:53.771 I felt pretty good until a girl laughed at me. 01:13:53.791 --> 01:13:56.473 Are you sure she wasn't just chuckling at the Bart Marley shirt? 01:13:56.493 --> 01:13:59.395 No, I think she thought it was disgusting and tasteless. 01:14:00.436 --> 01:14:05.660 And rather than that being fashionable, I thought the reaction might be, oh, that's disgusting and horrible. 01:14:05.720 --> 01:14:06.341 You're cool. 01:14:06.361 --> 01:14:06.861 You're cool. 01:14:06.961 --> 01:14:07.382 It wasn't. 01:14:07.522 --> 01:14:09.183 It was, that's disgusting and horrible. 01:14:09.603 --> 01:14:11.004 You're disgusting and horrible. 01:14:11.305 --> 01:14:11.705 No. 01:14:12.005 --> 01:14:12.366 I don't know. 01:14:12.406 --> 01:14:13.046 I'm just being paranoid. 01:14:13.086 --> 01:14:20.232 How could anyone find a picture of Bart Simpson smoking a big fat jazz cigarette with a big load of dreadlocks on his head? 01:14:20.292 --> 01:14:21.192 And the words, Bart, not me. 01:14:23.714 --> 01:14:26.295 The man in the shop said it would help me blend in. 01:14:26.635 --> 01:14:29.917 Well, we're sandwiched between the Sainsbury's Local and the Roundhouse. 01:14:30.177 --> 01:14:38.120 Two of the most important places in Camden and of course the Roundhouse is the hub of the Camden crawl where the biggest bands are playing. 01:14:38.180 --> 01:14:39.061 Who's playing here tonight? 01:14:39.861 --> 01:14:41.062 You don't know? 01:14:41.102 --> 01:14:41.862 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:14:42.023 --> 01:14:43.063 Oh, nice. 01:14:43.103 --> 01:14:44.584 Bet-mouthed that to you, didn't he? 01:14:44.664 --> 01:14:45.205 I knew that. 01:14:45.285 --> 01:14:46.886 I knew they were playing, I just wasn't sure where. 01:14:46.926 --> 01:14:48.567 But yeah, all the biggest bands are playing here. 01:14:49.367 --> 01:14:55.532 And as a result, there's a huge queue of attractive hipsters waiting to get in. 01:14:55.812 --> 01:14:59.054 Individuals, some of whom look a little bit like Jack Pinati. 01:14:59.394 --> 01:15:03.277 There's some kind of DJ slouchy chaps with very large headphones on. 01:15:04.077 --> 01:15:09.361 Some very beautiful women wearing leggings and indecently short skirts. 01:15:10.121 --> 01:15:11.082 It's really happening here. 01:15:11.382 --> 01:15:17.084 I wonder how some of the people in this queue would judge our new outfits, you know? 01:15:17.785 --> 01:15:18.485 What's your name, sir? 01:15:18.705 --> 01:15:19.085 Tosten. 01:15:19.466 --> 01:15:25.668 We just bought some stuff from Camden Market down there to blend in a little bit more because we're a bit old. 01:15:26.589 --> 01:15:27.909 So how do you think it's gone? 01:15:27.969 --> 01:15:29.090 Joe bought this t-shirt. 01:15:29.110 --> 01:15:29.390 Yeah. 01:15:30.090 --> 01:15:32.452 The man in the shop said it would make me fashionable. 01:15:33.652 --> 01:15:35.633 Can be, yes. 01:15:36.153 --> 01:15:37.214 Tosten's impressed by that. 01:15:37.794 --> 01:15:38.694 What about my hat? 01:15:38.874 --> 01:15:39.574 I just bought this. 01:15:39.594 --> 01:15:41.135 Oh, it looks better. 01:15:42.635 --> 01:15:44.196 How much would you pay for a hat like that? 01:15:44.696 --> 01:15:45.216 Ten pounds. 01:15:48.036 --> 01:15:49.917 Thank you for talking to us. 01:15:50.357 --> 01:15:50.977 What's your name? 01:15:51.137 --> 01:15:51.917 My name's Lulu. 01:15:52.377 --> 01:15:52.938 Hi, Lulu. 01:15:53.518 --> 01:15:55.418 You look ridiculous in that hat. 01:15:55.678 --> 01:15:58.359 We've bought these things to make us blend in in Camden, right? 01:15:58.419 --> 01:16:03.020 And the man in the shop said that top hat was all the rage and that this t-shirt... 01:16:03.760 --> 01:16:04.861 was really cool as well. 01:16:04.881 --> 01:16:06.722 There are many top hats going on here. 01:16:06.742 --> 01:16:09.023 I think each of you could have something more like this. 01:16:09.323 --> 01:16:10.124 So many cool boots. 01:16:10.224 --> 01:16:11.925 Instead of like these walker boots as well. 01:16:12.085 --> 01:16:15.447 Yeah, but you're wearing hexagonal mirror things around your neck. 01:16:15.487 --> 01:16:17.268 Yeah, I've got a mirror ball around my neck. 01:16:17.368 --> 01:16:18.348 How is that better than a top hat? 01:16:18.368 --> 01:16:20.570 It's like a universe that's exploded onto my chest. 01:16:21.210 --> 01:16:22.130 How cool is that? 01:16:22.190 --> 01:16:24.212 Look, every man is wearing a checked shirt. 01:16:24.252 --> 01:16:25.172 Look, there's three of them. 01:16:25.272 --> 01:16:25.993 There's three of them. 01:16:26.853 --> 01:16:28.395 All in a row, three Czech shirts. 01:16:28.416 --> 01:16:29.577 Is that individuality? 01:16:30.178 --> 01:16:31.900 Or is that conformity? 01:16:32.201 --> 01:16:40.913 Do you not think the Bart Simpson t-shirt is a more individual statement than the than the Czech e-shirt? 01:16:41.634 --> 01:16:43.457 No, I'm really bored about Simpson. 01:16:43.857 --> 01:16:45.698 Yeah, but that in itself is cool, isn't it? 01:16:45.718 --> 01:16:48.640 I mean, when everyone else is bored, I'm still interested. 01:16:49.160 --> 01:16:50.521 So it means I don't follow the herd. 01:16:51.082 --> 01:16:54.043 Well, that's a sartorial update from the queue outside the roundhouse. 01:16:54.083 --> 01:16:54.704 Thank you very much, Lulu. 01:16:54.724 --> 01:16:55.504 You've lost your place in the queue. 01:16:55.764 --> 01:16:56.205 I don't care. 01:16:56.225 --> 01:16:59.447 I've only just... You can get back in there with my checkmates. 01:17:00.347 --> 01:17:01.008 Checkmates. 01:17:01.288 --> 01:17:01.628 Doesn't matter. 01:17:01.868 --> 01:17:02.249 Take care. 01:17:02.409 --> 01:17:03.449 Thanks for talking to us, Lulu. 01:17:03.469 --> 01:17:03.789 Bye-bye. 01:17:03.809 --> 01:17:04.270 Thank you. 01:17:05.458 --> 01:17:07.379 Was she just shouting, Willy? 01:17:07.619 --> 01:17:08.899 Yes, yes, yes. 01:17:08.939 --> 01:17:09.640 She loves Willy's. 01:17:10.420 --> 01:17:11.280 That was the song about Willy's. 01:17:11.320 --> 01:17:21.965 By Gold Heart Assembly, they were playing live at the Camden Crawl last night as part of Steve LaMax's shindig at the Dublin Castle, which by all accounts was an absolute smash. 01:17:22.325 --> 01:17:23.125 So thank you very much. 01:17:23.165 --> 01:17:24.946 They were sounding great there, Gold Heart Assembly. 01:17:25.346 --> 01:17:27.007 Adam and Joe here on BBC Six Music. 01:17:27.247 --> 01:17:31.709 It's almost time to say goodbye to your listeners, but we're going to just wrap things up in the Text-o-Nation house. 01:17:31.949 --> 01:17:47.959 Yeah, we should remind people we're live from the Camden crawl hence the peculiar acoustics and the hubbub Yeah, but we've been doing a text the nation all about non-serious injuries now I wouldn't exactly call this an injury as I know I would call this an injury the other day I got a little fly in my eye and 01:17:48.579 --> 01:17:48.799 Right? 01:17:49.480 --> 01:17:52.323 How many often times have you had fly in your eye? 01:17:52.343 --> 01:17:54.905 Often times, fly in eye. 01:17:55.105 --> 01:17:57.027 A big full-size fly, a big fat fly. 01:17:57.087 --> 01:17:59.029 No, not like a blue bottle or a house fly. 01:17:59.049 --> 01:18:00.830 But not like a tiny little insect thing. 01:18:01.050 --> 01:18:05.655 It was a sort of a midgy thing and the thing is I could see him approaching me, right? 01:18:05.775 --> 01:18:06.115 Yes. 01:18:06.135 --> 01:18:06.155 3D. 01:18:06.535 --> 01:18:08.277 And I thought, he's not coming from my eye, is he? 01:18:09.378 --> 01:18:09.778 Wam! 01:18:09.838 --> 01:18:10.999 Straight into the eyeball. 01:18:11.240 --> 01:18:12.280 Landed on the eyeball. 01:18:13.221 --> 01:18:24.565 And I immediately tried to rub it out, but I was worried that by rubbing it, I would cause it to get deeper into the folds of my eyeball and the flesh, if you know what I'm saying. 01:18:25.066 --> 01:18:30.208 And sure enough, the fly drifted around the eyeball. 01:18:30.308 --> 01:18:36.170 Was it sort of spread-eagled on your field of vision like one of those Garfield's that you put on your car window? 01:18:36.710 --> 01:19:03.279 staring at you hugely I couldn't see it because it was not over my actual iris you know so it wasn't being dealt with it was out of my field of vision but I was very anxious that it would remain there forever because I couldn't get this thing out at all and I wept I thought of some sad things to make me weep also my eye was naturally watering because of the irritation the fly was causing but you know can they just stay in there it stayed in there for about a day it felt like it was in there 01:19:04.181 --> 01:19:04.941 Yeah, I did it. 01:19:05.781 --> 01:19:06.701 You know, that's good, that's good. 01:19:07.182 --> 01:19:13.523 In there for a day, well, they decompose and their natural vitamins inside them actually enhance your eyesight. 01:19:13.603 --> 01:19:14.183 Yeah, do they? 01:19:14.223 --> 01:19:15.523 Yeah, I recovered from that. 01:19:15.543 --> 01:19:18.144 Because I used to think, I used to think that's what, you know, floaters, right? 01:19:18.804 --> 01:19:25.325 When you, when you see, sometimes you see what seems like little hairs in front of your field of vision drifting around when you move your eyeball. 01:19:25.585 --> 01:19:25.805 Right. 01:19:25.825 --> 01:19:26.645 They're called floaters. 01:19:26.965 --> 01:19:27.125 Right. 01:19:27.145 --> 01:19:29.766 And I used to think they were flies eggs, not eggs, but legs. 01:19:31.288 --> 01:19:46.108 flies legs that have got in there really why don't you read out a couple of texts there you're no use whatsoever with my first story I'm just amazed I've got this picture of the surface of your eyeball now with severed legs yeah spread eagle insects all kinds of stuff going on in that little Camden crawl on my eyeball 01:19:46.808 --> 01:19:56.051 Here is one from Jen in Muswell Hill who says, oh no, I can't read that one out I've started reading the wrong one out and now Jen's gonna get disappointed because Jen's just sent in a horrific injury, right? 01:19:56.251 --> 01:19:57.812 Yeah, it's too horrific. 01:19:58.312 --> 01:20:00.493 It involves a split lateral wrist ligament. 01:20:00.933 --> 01:20:00.973 Oh 01:20:01.573 --> 01:20:03.893 Seriously, you don't want to hear about that, do you know? 01:20:03.933 --> 01:20:05.414 The elite squadron are shaking their heads. 01:20:05.754 --> 01:20:06.954 This is from Robin Shrewsbury. 01:20:07.254 --> 01:20:11.835 On the theme of finger pain, my mother once burned the end of her finger in perhaps the most idiotic way possible. 01:20:12.335 --> 01:20:16.556 Whilst driving an unfamiliar car, she mistook the cigarette lighter for the fog light and pressed it. 01:20:17.136 --> 01:20:27.438 When it became clear what had happened, she examined the cigarette lighter, decided that she had to deactivate it before it could be returned to the dashboard, and inexplicably elected to put her finger into the lighter. 01:20:28.158 --> 01:20:46.102 the smell of burning finger skin stays with me to this day that is horrible mum that's very sweet poor mum she doesn't she doesn't smoke doesn't understand cigarettes yeah doesn't know what this thing is sticks her finger in it poor mum that's terrible have you got one more to wrap it up there no 01:20:48.702 --> 01:20:51.363 We're going to play out with Lupe Fiasco with Superstar. 01:20:51.383 --> 01:20:52.043 That's in a second. 01:20:52.103 --> 01:20:52.543 Good choice. 01:20:52.583 --> 01:20:57.344 We'd just like to say a very sincere thank you to all the people that have emailed us and texted today. 01:20:57.724 --> 01:21:04.226 But most especially, we'd like to say thank you to all the members of Black Squadron that have come to join us live in Camden this morning. 01:21:04.286 --> 01:21:05.646 Thank you very much, Black Squadron. 01:21:05.666 --> 01:21:06.647 Well done, Black Squadron. 01:21:06.707 --> 01:21:07.487 Thank you for coming. 01:21:10.848 --> 01:21:11.668 And you realize 01:21:13.707 --> 01:21:17.308 You realize you now have an extraordinary mantle of responsibility. 01:21:17.588 --> 01:21:18.588 You are envoys. 01:21:18.708 --> 01:21:20.129 You are the elite squadron. 01:21:20.589 --> 01:21:24.010 So you command your local and regional ranks of black squadron. 01:21:24.570 --> 01:21:28.551 So when tasks are issued, you have to make sure they're obeyed. 01:21:28.611 --> 01:21:33.493 And you know you have the legal right to go into anyone's house in the country. 01:21:33.533 --> 01:21:34.113 Did you know that? 01:21:35.057 --> 01:21:35.658 Well, there you go. 01:21:35.718 --> 01:21:37.360 You will get thrown out and arrested, obviously. 01:21:37.380 --> 01:21:38.061 Yeah, you'll be arrested. 01:21:38.101 --> 01:21:39.623 But legally, you can go in. 01:21:39.924 --> 01:21:40.144 Yeah. 01:21:40.945 --> 01:21:43.228 But thank you very much, all of you, for coming this morning. 01:21:43.268 --> 01:21:45.912 We're very pleased and happy. 01:21:46.332 --> 01:21:47.854 And thanks to everyone for listening. 01:21:48.074 --> 01:21:48.836 Pleased and happy. 01:21:50.017 --> 01:21:52.698 Also, I hope you have a good time if you're going to the Camden Call today. 01:21:53.759 --> 01:21:54.879 It should be a fun time. 01:21:55.200 --> 01:21:57.921 Yeah, thanks to everyone who's put this OB together as well. 01:21:57.961 --> 01:22:01.883 Lots of hard-working BBC people plugged all the wires in. 01:22:02.003 --> 01:22:03.604 Yes, we appreciate it very much. 01:22:03.684 --> 01:22:06.225 Don't forget to download the podcast on Monday evening. 01:22:06.565 --> 01:22:08.986 Stay tuned for Liz Kershaw and have a great weekend. 01:22:09.226 --> 01:22:09.687 See you next week.